I need advice badly. I have been having trouble with FHs family since day one. One of his sisters absolutely hates me, and does her best to make me miserable. The other day she had the nerve to tell my FMIL that i HATE her and their entire family, leading to a huge blow up, his mother crying and me wanting to shove her head through a wall. I am very close with his other sister, and want her to be a bridesmaid in our wedding, but I dont want to insult the sister I cant stand. Even though I dont like her I dont want to make things worse. FH says that I am supposed to like my bridesmaids so he doesnt care if i only have the sister I like. These are the same people who said if i didnt have our wedding in suffolk they wouldnt come i have no idea what to do anymore. Im seriously considering just cutting my losses and eloping.
KRISTIND
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Re: future In laws...
aww sorry u r going through this...a wedding is supposed to be joyous....maybe u can sit them down and talk
JAAMS
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They sound like a nightmare, I'm sorry that you're going through that :/
Could you maybe sit down with these people and see what is going on? Or could FH do that? So at least whatever their issue is is out in the open.
As far BM's, you should just have the sister that you want (if that's what you want to do).
Scarpak
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These people dont communicate at all. When I say his family is the complete opposite of mine i mean the COMPLETE opposite. They are so so strange. This has been going on for so long. The only way they know how to communicate is to talk behind my back. Its miserable. I refuse to let them control my wedding though. They gave me the suffolk stipulation and i fell in love with a place in nassau and i booked it. Oh well if they dont come.
asg450
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Re: future In laws...
Omg, I'm so sorry you are going through this. I agree with your FH, you need a bridesmaids that care about you and will be there for you. I think either way, if you put the other sister in your bridal party or not, there will be some issue. She might decide to throw a tantrum because she doesn't like the dress or color you choose for them. Or who knows what else. I'm sorry to say it, but I don't think you can escape having drama with that sister.
If your FH doesn't mind if only one of his sister's is a bridesmaid then that's all that matters.
KatieG2010
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ahhhh what a BEEE!!!!! I don't think you should be forced to put her in. If she hates you so much, she shouldn't even want to be in the BP anyway. In your situation it seems like you are damned if you do and damned if you don't. I'm sorry!! This girl seriously needs a new hobby.
Reesy
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It's your day, your bridesmaids should be people you love....you already know she hates you so who cares if she feels insulted. She should expect to not be a bridesmaid anyway. Plan your wedding the way that will make you happy, don't worry about what anyone has to say. Hope it works out for you.
debzy
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You need to make peace with his family ASAP. Talk to his mom one-on-one instead of letting her hear things from others.
bride2b57
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UHH I feel for you. That must be really tough. My FIL's are not a problem. While growing up though, my Mom had a lot of issues with my grandparents. It can be really difficult and unfortunatly, it won't end once you say I do. It sounds like they are pushy (demanding you have the wedding in Suffolk) My Mom has said in the past that the best thing she did was stand her ground and not allow them to push her around. Oh and another thing...we were looking through my Mom and Dad's wedding album the other day and I noticed she put my Dad's sisters in the wedding...one she did NOT get along with at all. She said she definitely would have done that differently if she could have done it all over. I think its important to remember that in the end this is your day and what makes you happy goes. Of course there may have to be some comprimising but not at your expense. Good luck.
MnM182008
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Take this from someone who knows all to well how you feel. DH has a very difficult family, well mostly his mother. They put me through so much prior to the wedding, you name it they did it to me. His mother did not want him to be married, still doesn't want him to be married.
I always believe in taking the high road. Obviously that doesn't mean you should be miserable. If his one sister doesn't like you I would still extend her an invite to be a bm,. If she doesn't like you, she will probably say no, and if she says yes maybe this will be an opportunity for you to make amends.
After the wedding things will only get worse if his family and you can't settle on things.
