Getting Discouraged....

My fiance and I were engaged in August and plan to get married in 1 year. Unfortunately something personal came up in September that emptied all our savings and so we are now left with no money to book a hall, etc.
We have still been looking at places (we are completely in love with the Venetian Yacht Club, and I'm dying to book it!) and vendors....but are struggling so much with money right now. I've decided to diy what I can but....we're just stuck right now.
I'm just getting discouraged about the whole thing and am wondering how average people afford to throw themselves a wedding! I'm very sad b/c I was so looking forward to everything!!! I want to book VYC so badly and am sad b/c I feel the date I want will be booked by the time we can come up with money just to book the place!!!!
Any suggestions/tips? How did you or are you affording you wedding? budgeting tips, or words of encouragement would be greatly appreciated!!! Thanks!

That totally sucks. On idea is to write to My Fair Wedding. That might be a long shot though. Can you possibly get married with just family and save for the wedding until you can afford it?
Hope it works out!!!

Jen

---

Posted by JenL

That totally sucks. On idea is to write to My Fair Wedding. That might be a long shot though. Can you possibly get married with just family and save for the wedding until you can afford it?
Hope it works out!!!

Jen

---

I checked into this last month and they are only accepting CA Brides

---

Posted by JenL

That totally sucks. On idea is to write to My Fair Wedding. That might be a long shot though. Can you possibly get married with just family and save for the wedding until you can afford it?
Hope it works out!!!

Jen

---

They haven't updated the casting call since they asked for Nov. 2011 brides

I'm so sorry to hear that you have to go through this. First off, this should be the happiest time of your LIFE! And although things seem like they're really sucking theres a light at the end of the tunnel for sure. Don't let it steal your joy!
FH and I are paying for our wedding all on our own and with me still in school he's the only source of income. We decided that we would have a long engagement to be sure we can pay for everything. Within this first year we are only concentrating on paying for our RH since thats the biggest thing. We'll be done paying for it a year before the wedding. We aren't going to stress about paying for anything else until next year around Sept once the RH is paid off. Thats how we're budgeting ourselves for now. Of course I would love to book my DJ and Photographer already but it's just something I know is not possible at the moment. Good Luck and cheer up! Remember to still try and enjoy these moments as much as you can!

---

Posted by KDNY133

I get discouraged from time to time. The one thing i did away with was limos. Since im staying on the grounds of the place i am having me and my girls get ready there. I went with a low ceterpiece that saved some money and i love love them. Think im going to DIY invites. Walmart has them for $19.00 for 50, im just going to print them up (not picky about the invites, i cant see spending a fortune but thats me) Most important thing that i learned is shop around. I went from crazy DJ quotes to finding a reputable DJ for $900.00 Go for a photographer that will give you the option to order your book at a later date. I am using the place cards that the hall is providing me with. I am paying attention to certain details that are important to me like my cake topper. Its so easy to wanna get carried away and want the best of the best but that ugly budget word is a reality, Just keep shopping and make sure you enjoy it. I had to step away from the planning for 2 months because i was ready to throw in the towel. You are not alone feeling this way.

---

ITA! This is my daily stress but everyone says it will get done. You have to come up with a budget and do some DIY projects. I'm not crafty at all but will enlist the help of some creative people. Perhaps have a small wedding or destination wedding of just close friends and family. There are venues out there that offer pacakges too and price also depends on what season you get married. Good luck!!

I get discouraged sometimes as well. I've had a few moments where I was worried that we weren't going to be able to afford having a nice wedding since we are paying for practically all of it on our own.

Just like KDNY133, we are not using limo's. Our ceremony and reception are at the same place so I don't see any point in wasting money on one.

Venue: We got the cost lowered since we eliminated a lot of food during cocktail hour. And even with that we still have a lot of food.

Centerpieces: I'm not using flowers. I'm only getting flowers for the bouquets and boutineers.

Photographer: I'm having a family member do them for $500. No photo album. We can put one together ourselves.

Invites: I'm still trying to decide on. 123print.com is the cheapest website I have found so far but you can't customize anything except for the font. I haven't seen anything I love though. I might go with DIY invites.

Videographer: My FI has a friend he knows that we are planning to ask. Don't know the cost yet.

DJ- We have a few in mind to look at.


Doing a nice wedding for cheap is do-able. You just need to look around and find ways to cut costs. Good luck! :)

Dont rush yourself. If you know what you want and you are willing to wait for it you can do it.
FH and I were both unemployed when we got engaged and moved out of state when we found jobs, which cost us almost all of our savings. We will have waited almost 3 years but we are now able to have the wedding we want.
We made a strict money diet and have stuck to it. Once we are married we want to continue on our 'diet' lol to buy a house.

Hun, I think I was the 2011 Posterchild for 'broke and discouraged', so I feel your pain! BUT, if I was able to do it, anyone can! We can share horror stories if you like ... but believe me, I went through it all!

I was totally in love with VYC too, but when they quoted me, those hopes and dreams were shot down quick! First things first - think of what you love most about VYC and see what other RH's offer it. For instance - if its the view of the water, check out CLM (and do it at TWOTY!). If it's the abundance of windows, not so much the view, check out places with lots of windows. If its the food, ask places for tastings. I was heart set on a weekend, late night, summer wedding, so I had no choice but to change venue. I fell in love with my RH hall, and oh man, it was the greatest day of my life! I would do it all again, regardless of (almost) everything I went through!

Keep your head up, feel free to FM

---

Posted by msz01587

Photographer: I'm having a family member do them for $500. No photo album. We can put one together ourselves.

---

PLEASE tell me you have seen their work, and you love it! If not, no offense to your family, but please don't do this to yourself. I had to put in endless hours editing all my pictures to make TY cards and albums just because I went cheap on photography. Again, if you saw their work and you already like it, then ignore me - I just don't want to see a fellow bride go through what I did!

Thank you everyone, I knew that talking to you would make me feel better :) It's always nice to know that you're not alone....No one ever talks about any struggles, and sometimes it passes off like nothing to just have a wedding!! I have been looking into diy'ing a lot of stuff and think I definitely am going to go down that road, besides I think it will be a blast!!! I want to diy my invitations, centerpieces, and save the dates........... Also, I was thinking that save the dates may not even be entirely necessary! so...idk! Also, we have already pretty much decided that 99.99% we will not have limos, being our ceremony and reception will be on sight.

Jen L : Thanks! It probably is a long shot though! The problem that cost me my savings is personal and legally I'm unable to talk about it. That would be a long shot! but thank you all input is appreciated!

KDNY133 : I was looking at the invitations at wal mart....I think the w.m. by me is getting rid of that section entirely b/c it has been greatly condensed....I didn't see anything I like but have been keeping my eye open! They had some good sales though, I just don't wanna just go with something only b/c it's cheap....I think if I'm patient I will find something I really like to diy. I know Michael's has kits too....Can you FM me the DJ name?? I know that High Energy Entertainment has packages starting at $900 as well, we plan on looking into them! A co-worker reccommended them to me....I didn't know that halls provide place cards! When the time comes I will definitely ask that question, it's very good to know! I have been enjoying my 'shopping' though, even if that's all it is for now! haha so that's good at least :) Thank you for all your advice!

nyrvixen: Hi! I think my sister bought a flower girl basket for really cheap...and I know I can find a ring bearer pillow at wal mart for cheap as well....but that's great to know!!! STD magnets,DIY?!! That's exciting I didn't think of that!! I would love for you to FM me about the details as of what to do.....are programs necessary?? I'm not sure of what they really consist of....do they get sent with the invitation or guests receive them upon arrival? what information do they contain? I didn't think of DIY'ing the card box! I was planning on DIY the invitations and centerpieces with table numbers...I've thought of chocolate favors, even have the molds! Going to use them for the engagement party...FH isn't really liking them as a wedding favor....we are exploring our options....We may still end up just doing the chocolate favors though! I didn't realize how much more I'd be able to DIY!!!! I would love help! My sister, mom, and cousin are going to help me with centerpieces/table numbers...I may just take you up on your offer though and FM you in the future :) Good Luck with everything....Thanks so much for your input!!! By the way, I notice your RH is Fox Hollow...It's right near my job...it looks gorgeous!! I always love seeing the lights in the evening!

tianamarie: I didn't think of just paying off the hall for a year and then everything else the next, that's a good idea we will consider! Thank you and good luck with EVERYTHING!!! :)

Bride2Be78: Hello, getting help is always a plus!! :) I have enlisted the help of my cousin, mom, and sister so far.... as far as a destination wedding, no one would be able to afford to come, and we've talked about just having the ceremony with just family and friends and than just a small celebration either at home or a restaurant/ knights of columbus etc.....FH agreed on ceremony only but if we're having a celebration, he wants all or nothing.....and the more time went on my heart is now just set on the whole shing ding! It doesn't have to be a million dollars glamorous....but just something nice...I don't mind DIY at all! I think it will be fun and am looking forward to it! :) Thanks for your help!! Talking to everyone has made me feel better

msz01587: Hi, I don't think I will be doing limos...that's something we've pretty much decided on works for us! and I agree about the flowers!! I don't want flower centerpieces anyway!!! So I am going to DIY them and I know I will save a ton there....Photography/videography- That's great! I am not sure yet....Photography/videography is where I want my one splurge to be b/c I just know that After all is said and done the digital memories and my own memories will be all I have left from 'my day'! Oh, and venue!!! we have decided to go with a winter wedding, definitely most reasonable for our budget and it is when our anniversary is, so it works out nicely :) that was something I didn't mind compromising on as long as I found a hall that suited what I want and for winter! and I fell in love with VYC, it's perfect!! for us :) Dj I'm not sure yet...we are definitely shopping around, if you come across any worth mentioning let me know! My co-worker reccommended High Energy entertainment...and I know on their website they have packages starting at $900 +
Thank you for all your ideas I find it so comforting to hear how other people are planning for their wedding!

DunkandBunk: Thank you!!! Thank you!!!! It's always worth a shot! I am definitely keeping that information for when I am ready! Thank you :)

ElizabethAndDan: Hello, thank you :) That is how we've started to look at it so now it's a matter of figuring out budgeting to meet our goals :)

LMEL1223: You're right :) Thank you....it's always helpful to talk to people in a similar boat! Good luck to you with everything!!!

Jovigirl414: Hi :) aw, thanks! We are going to have a winter wedding so VYC prices for the time we are looking at are actually pretty reasonable and they're willing to throw in some extras being the off seasonso that will definitely be helpful ...(it's the view annnnd the windows I am so in love with, and they've renovated...the inside looks amazing too!)...We have looked at CLM and they were cheaper, but I just....didn't like it, so being that VYC is and O K price, we will probably go with them.....the top 2 things we didn't want to compromise on are RH and entertainment.....season, food, etc. we are willing to work around....the food has to be good of course! haha
What is this TWOTY thing everyone is speaking of?!?!?!
I am so happy everything worked out for you!!! Thank you for your insight It's nice to know I have someone I'd be able to talk to, thank you....I don't know many people that have gone through the whole wedding thing....the ones I do know aren't entirely approachable!

its really rough; we've been scrapping every cent we have to pay for it. fiance forked over every penny of his holiday tips - i felt so bad. i told him to keep 50 for himself.
one of the things we did, was book our hall 2+ years in advance so that we could pay it off over time and save up enough. i also saved by buying a gown off the rack that is a few years older. and my invitations are going to be as diy as possible.
wish you the best of luck! every girl should be able to have the wedding of her dreams.

Another idea (it may be a little late since you are already paying your RH) is to go just beer and wine. That took off $10/person for us! Michaels has the DIY STD magnets 30 for $10! They always have coupons and thats what I am doing.

I am right there with you with the depressed everytime I think of money! I know how you feel. We all gotta hang in there and lean on eachother.

There are a few places out there who can do almost everything in one place for you in one package cost.

I just read this on another website about Brentwood Country Club:

They offer a package deal that includes: video, photo, DJ, Cake, flowers and Limo for about 10K. This is for 100 people and any addtional is $65 per person. The food is good, the open bar is good and generally the staff is pleasant. You can also remove vendors to drop the price although it isnt signaficant and normally you can't find better price. To take out Video, photo or flowers it's $500 each. I will also review each vendor seperately but in brief: I dont really recommend the florist(Ken & Eva's Flower Cottage), the centerpieces were ugly and not what i expected. We are still waiting on photos but so far so good. Video guy was pleasant but again we're waiting on that. The food was good, the cake was good. We also had the ceremony there which was a $500 fee and it was beautiful.

I'm sure if you DIY the favors or centerpieces, maybe cut some of the menu options or open bar, the price will be significantly lower, too, wherever you choose.

---

Posted by NPenak13
What is this TWOTY thing everyone is speaking of?!?!?!
I am so happy everything worked out for you!!! Thank you for your insight It's nice to know I have someone I'd be able to talk to, thank you....I don't know many people that have gone through the whole wedding thing....the ones I do know aren't entirely approachable!

---

Aww, don't mention it, that's what this website is all about, brides helping each other out! The good thing is, that you have PLENTY of time to price out all different vendors. I had a fairly low budget wedding, and I got some GREAT vendors at awesome prices (most about 6 months from the wedding date).

TWOTY is short for LIW's annual event, 'The Wedding of the Year'. I just noticed you might be a little too new to join this year, though.