Would you give a gift if you were invited to a wedding but couldn't attend (if it were family)? If so, when would you send it? With the RSVP or at another time?
Boop2704
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Re: Giving gift if not going to a wedding?
I would send a little something. If not cash, then maybe a giftcard or gift to where the couple is registered. I would send it with a nice card a few weeks before the wedding.
RedHead
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depends...150 i think
marymoon
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You are obligated to give a gift when invited to a wedding..that's etiquette. Etiquette aside, since it's family I'd defintiely give a gift. It should be before the wedding. You cna send a check with the RSVP (which some people have done), but I think it's more personal if you send a separate card expressing your well wishes and how you wish you could be there, etc etc. If you mail it the same day as the rsvp it'll get there at the same time.
kptoys
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thanks!!
Rob-luvs-me
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I always send a nice gift when I can't go I don't like to penalize the person if I can't attend their wedding.
I send it though right before the wedding. I think it is nicer to get it around your day than so far in advance.
ChristineC68
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Posted by marymoon
You are obligated to give a gift when invited to a wedding..that's etiquette. Etiquette aside, since it's family I'd defintiely give a gift. It should be before the wedding. You cna send a check with the RSVP (which some people have done), but I think it's more personal if you send a separate card expressing your well wishes and how you wish you could be there, etc etc. If you mail it the same day as the rsvp it'll get there at the same time.
Actually, you are never obligated to get a gift. It goes against ettiquette to expect one also.
KP - if we can't attend a wedding, family or friend, we send a gift with the RSVP card.
Ang&Rich
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I agree with Christine - you are not expected to send a gift and it's completely up to you. My rule of thumb - if I like you or if your family then I'll send a gift - especially if you are invited to my wedding or attended my wedding. I have not given gifts to a few people - one I regret (we were young and stupid) but the other one I had no intention of giving a gift.
I usually give about $100 - $200 if not attending (and depending on who the person is).
HTH
nicknmb
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I would send a gift if it was family. I think you can send it with the RSVP. I don't think you need to give as much as you would if you went to the wedding though. Or you can send something off their registry.
sweetadeline
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I would send a gift... no matter if the person is a relative or a friend.
DecBride04
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We can't attend one of FI's co-workers weddings come this June, becuase one of his very good friends is getting married the same day. We have to attend the friends wedding over hers, so when we send back the response card, we are slipping in a check for a gift. We would have attended otherwise, so felt bad. It is the only nice thing to do.
Scoop
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I normally send a gift if I can't attend the wedding. I sometimes check send something from their registry or a check.
sag530
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I send a gift especially if it is a family member or close friend. Usually cash a week or two before the wedding.
marymoon
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according to EP it's obligatory when it's a close friend or relative. Which is why if it's someone far away who you know won't come, you should send an announcement after the fact, rather than an invitation..but that shouldn't be your reason for giving a gift. I'd want to anyway!
Pickle
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We're sending one to a cousin who is getting married a week after us, in CA.. :)
I put a reminder in my computer for a couple of weeks ahead of time to send them a card & present before our wedding (unless i see something i love on their registry sooner)..
AliKing
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Re: Giving gift if not going to a wedding?
If it is family I would send a gift with the RSVP.
