Guest counts

Guest counts

Re: Guest counts

Guest counts - Long Island Weddings

I'm way past the guest list shock...lol
that's the very first thing I did..I was hoping for 150 invites, wasn't happening without offending both sides of the family!! luckily for us we liked the bigger/ biggest room in our hall so our min is 175 so now I'm thinking of 210 invites? I don't want to be over 175!!! I'll freak out again about head count when invites are out and I'm waiting for no's lol

Guest counts - Long Island Weddings

It's completely normal. My FMIL flipped out when we told her she couldn't invite all or her work friends to the wedding because we are keeping it small... it'll all fall into place (well, that's what I keep telling myself, haha!)

Guest counts - Long Island Weddings

Have a glass of wine might help you to relax & unwind !! :) I have to guarantee 125 and I am praying that we get to 125 but on my guest list we wrote up we came up with 160 people so... Kind of counting on some people not being able to make it?

Guest counts - Long Island Weddings

We're garunteeing 175 n my initial final count (that's a blatant oxymoron, I'm aware) is 233!! They say (whoever 'they' are) to expect 80% to respond 'yes' so that'll bring us to about 185 which isn't terrible but knowing that I could have a possible 233 freaks me out. After I wrote this post I handed all three lists over to the FH and told them to combine them all for me n give me a number. That was a lot easier than just watching the number rise with every name. He sat at the kitchen table and write them all out AND checked the ones we still need addresses for. He's my anti anxiety...for now.

Guest counts - Long Island Weddings

We were solid at inviting 100, but had our B-list back up in case some couldn't make it.

There were some people we knew HAD to be there and others who we would like to have there. When we found out my cousins from CO couldn't come, we sent a save the date to 4 from our B-list. We continued doing this as we found out up front some couldn't make it. We also weeded out some 'and guest' as we know some people aren't in a serious relationship so we can add some other guests in those spots.

We don't want our B-list guests to Feel like B-list guests. We are still sending invites to those we know can't make it so as not to leave them out, but now we can also send to our B-list guests with the main bunch and know we haven't gone over our count.

We would have invited more, but we can't afford even one extra guest.

FH has been between jobs for 3+ years, and is a Biochemist. He keeps applying, but can't find work in his field, so we need to keep a tight lid on the guests invited as well as extras.
We are only upgrading the limo so far and that is because I have a bad back and will be in a dress. We are also making a lot of our stuff to save money.

We will be sending out or invites early with an early rsvp date so we can send out more to our b-list if necessary so theirs aren't last minute invites.

Good luck with your invites. Might want to see if the way we are doing it works for your and helps you de-stress and narrow down the Must haves and the Like to haves.

Guest counts - Long Island Weddings

The head count is the topic I'm dreading the most ??

Guest counts - Long Island Weddings

This is SO stressful!!! Both FH and I have large families, so we have to be stringent on either friends or family members (or I am being strict anyway)! My word of advice, or at least my guideline for the guest list, is that it's both you and FH's day...not a day to be concerned about who is offended or not by a lack of invite. If someone is offended by not being invited, then they obviously don't understand the cost of weddings nowadays. Besides the cost factor, if someone is offended and becomes distant for not being invited, then even more reason for not receiving an invite. And I am totally not this type of person (I'm a major people pleaser), but it's your day and you and FH's say! The most important thing is the two of you are happy, not disgruntled uninvited persons.

Guest counts - Long Island Weddings

It just...keeps...GROWING. Feeeeeck!

Guest counts - Long Island Weddings

I actually have the opposite problem lol - FH's mother is from Germany so her entire family is over there (besides her). I think only about 5 people are coming from Germany for the wedding. Also, my father's extended family is HUGE but we don't really talk to or see any of them! So we are guaranteeing 125 I believe, and a majority of this will be friends and family friends. I will probably have seats to fill lol. I am stressing over paying for seats that are empty! So I feel your pain, just for another reason :)

Re: Guest counts

Have a a n b list but have a glass of wine doing it lol

Re: Guest counts

Guest counts - Long Island Weddings

Buy your dress and I think from there it all feels easier... and yes, wine!! Then after the wine, have the talk with FH about realistic #s, and tell him it's giving you too much anxiety! I've done this a few times with FH, because he wants to invite everyone he's ever said Hello to. After telling him the full costs of $pp, tax, and service at different places for 100 guests vs 125+, and the difference of thousands and thousands of dollars, he really gets it even more. Unfortunately I have 60+ family members of cousins, aunts, uncles that I really have to invite, or I'd be pushing for the 100 mark lol. Having big families are both a blessing and a curse when it comes to wedding planning. You'll get through it!!! Just breathe, drink wine, and/ or get a prescription for Ativan lol. FM me if you need to vent, I think we're stuck in the same place!