Guest list help needed..what would you do?

Guest list help needed..what would you do?

Our invites went out this week, and some people already got them. My fi's brother, his fiance and daughter were invited, all names were on the invite. My fi's brother asked my fi today for us to invite his step-daughter from a previous marriage. Basically, he is no longer married to this girl's mother, but since she is half-sister to his daughter and he lived with her for several years, he wants her to be there. He even told my fi that he would 'cover her plate'. I just feel the pressure even more of being on such a tight budget and trying to keep the guest list down w/o hurting people's feelings. What should we do?

Guest list help needed..what would you do?

If the girls are like sisters and he is still a father figure to this girl I think it would be unfair to NOT invite her too. Divorce doesn't change the fact that he loves this child and has helped raise her. I am sure he must still spend time with her. Also doesn't your FH knows this little girl? Does she call him Uncle? Regardless of whether or not he covers her plate, I would not pick one little girl over the other. Just my opinion.

I would invite her ...

and avoid a family conflict ... plus I'm sure she will be less expensive since she is a kid. I know how you feel though, I have relatives coming from Canada who I did not invite their child, but is coming anyway. I couldn't say no - they are making the trip. This person does consider this girl to be his daughter and he is not asking to bring his friend's friend or something like that! So, I would most likely avoid all conflict and just say fine - and vent to my mother and FH - but hey, tis life! :-(

Guest list help needed..what would you do?

We are planning on inviting her, b/c fi's brother requested it. And of course we would never expect or accept for him to cover her plate, but he is the one who came out and said it. If we invite someone, we invite them b/c we want to. The only thing is that he is not her father, and is not raising her, but lived with her from when she was 6-10 yo, now she is 15. When we think of my fi's brother and his family, it's him, his fiance and his daughter. We see this other girl 1 x per year, she lives upstate. For example, we only buy his daughter a xmas present, since she is my fi's niece. The other girl is not his niece. I'm just trying to figure out if we offended anyone, or made a mistake by not inviting her.

Guest list help needed..what would you do?

what a tough situation. I don`t know what I would do, tell you the truth. I guess you have no choice but to invite this girl, or it seems you WOULD offend someone. I don`t know where people get the idea that THEY can start inviting people to YOUR wedding...who ever started that rule??
Maybe, in their defense, maybe they plan on seeing the girl the weekend of your wedding and to leave her home would be rude? Just trying to think of a reason why they would add an extra person on to their invite and that makes the most sense to me.
Now that I think about it, I might have to be hard nosed about something like this..can`t you just tell people that you budgeted for a certain amount of people and there`s no room for extras? They should respect that since it IS your wedding. I would think if someone pushes the issue, then they are the ones being rude, not you. It doesn`t hurt to ask, but if you say no, it`s no and that`s that!!