Ok, I have a large family...on both mom and dad's side of the family. All except for 1 Uncle live out of state AND my entire mom's side of the family lives overseas. I am trying to make a tentative guest list of approximately how many people will be invited and the thing is, a big chunk of people who will be invited MAY NOT be able to attend due to financial reasons and because it's such a long way away (they are in Peru) but I still have to invite them. MY MOTHER does not understand the fact that I have to book the catering hall NOW with an IDEA of how many people to invite. She said she CANT give me a number of people who are coming b/c she has NO IDEA if they will be able to attend. She doesnt understand that I have to know how big my wedding will be in order to reserve a catering hall. Her argument is she knows hundreds of friends and family in South America and the majority WONT be realistically able to make it. AAAAGH! How does this work? How long before the wedding date can you give the catering hall your final tally?
jfabbride
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Re: Guest List Question
hi,
We don't have to give the final head count till a week before the wedding. We did have to guarantee a certain amount of people.
Good luck and Congrats
MarcellaBella
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ours wanted a number 30 days before and the final number 1-2 weeks before...
Alright, I know about etitquette.. but is it possible for you to send the ones you know won't come announcements as opposed to actual invites? you need to know this information..
do you already have a hall booked?
JZNCK
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Re: Guest List Question
for our hall, we had to give a minimum.. We went with a room that could occupy as little as 120 people but as many as 200+ so just in case if we had more then our minimum (150) we'd be ok.. check with your halls, and see what there minimum is.. We have to have 150!!!
nsgraham
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Re: Guest List Question
I think you need to figure out your budget and work backwards. If you have a $15,000 budget for the reception, you can *maybe* have 150-170 people, depending on the hall. I think. Work your list around the figure you come up with.
Good luck!
neesiepie
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We figured about 150-175 people....so we are working around that... this is such a HEADACHE!
tourist
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I think most places have a big range- mine is 75- 130, I think that's defitinely helpful. I have a feeling FMIL will add on some later on.
Besides the hall, you need to know how many invites to order & in general need to base your budget on the # of people. I would say, unless they ferquently come to the US from Peru, the majority of them won't come. Try to get your mother to at least say how many she wants you to invite, even if she can't predict who will come. That will give you your maximum. Then do the count without any of them, to get your minimum. Some of them may come, but some local people may not, so it should approximatley balance out.
butterfly20
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Re: Guest List Question
my hall was a minimum guarantee of 100, but holds upto 200..
... i know my sister originally was planing on 75, then she ended up adding people after she picked the place and had like 110(which was the room max) and it was crowded... maybe you can pick a place with a bigger range just incase those people show up, but not to count on it?
Jen_n_Dale
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We have to guarantee 150. I am not sure if we will make it or not because Dale is taking his sweet old time getting the lists from both parents. So worse comes to worse if I am short some of you will be getting invites.
shelly3950
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I am in a similar situation. My FH's parents are each one of 11 children. But they all live in another country. What I did is figure out about 20% will not come (that is the usual average- I think). I found a place that did not have a maximum but had a large capacity for everyone we need to invite. I am figuring (and hoping) that not everyone will be coming, but I picked a place we can afford in case people do come.
It is a helpful that my FMIL told me that she is not inviting all her and husband's siblings and thier spouses, but that we will have a party in thier country within 1 year of the wedding. Can you suggest that to your mom, that you will have a party in Peru to celebrate with all your family there?
neesiepie
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Re: Guest List Question
Yeah, we were thinking of having a party in Peru after our wedding here....but we still have to send out the invites...which is where she is giving me the headache. lol. I toldher to make a list of EVERYONE, whether they come or not, and when we go there to visit in 2 weeks, we will ask them each if they SERIOUSLY think they can come. Hopefully, they will be honest and this way we will have some kind of idea when we go to book the catering hall..... So, I just have to find a place with a low minimum and a lot of room to grow.... Thanks for all your help ladies!
Maribelle7777
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Re: Guest List Question
They say about 20% to 30% normally decline the invitation. So tack on another 20% and say between 40% and 50% decline (and I'm being good ... you might want to say 75% of those you invite from Peru won't show up but you don't want to overestimate).
Then make up the list of everyone you plan on sending an invitation to, subtract the 40% to 50% and then decide on how big your hall should be. Remember you need moving around and dancing room.
Nora101004
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Re: Guest List Question
I'd talk to the banquet managers about your situation and see what they say. Do you have any 'B' list type friends in case you don't meet your min. number of guests.
