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Guest vent....what do you think?

tropicalbride07 Posted:

Guest vent....what do you think?

I have mentioned we are having an extremely intimate wedding of 24 guests total. Of the friends, they all know eachother. We have 2 guests who are not dating anyone, so the invites were addressed to just them, no '& guest'.

We expected it of him, but we got the reply of 'yes & guest'. How would you feel if a guest took it upon themselves to invite a guest? Especially since they know this is extremely small, and not a typical wedding he is probably used too. Plus it's not a wedding where he 'needs' to show off that he can find a date. We all know he is not with anyone serious.

We are not going to say anything, but I wanted to see all your thoughts on this.

nbc188 Posted:

Re: Guest vent....what do you think?

We had a small wedding also, but thankfully didn't have this problem. I personally would reiterate the fact that you're only inviting 24 people and want the 'intimate' feel of a small wedding with only your closest friends & family, and if he would reconsider bringing a random guest. I don't think it's rude to ask for what you want.

LaurenluvsTJ Posted:

Re: Guest vent....what do you think?

Usually I would say that I don't agree not inviting people without guests, but the fact that you are having such an small, intimate wedding means that only people who are very close to you are going to be there, and this is not the place for strangers. I would definitely call him and explain this and tell him he cannot bring his guest.

CLMon7906 Posted:

Re: Guest vent....what do you think?


Posted by LaurenluvsTJ

Usually I would say that I don't agree not inviting people without guests, but the fact that you are having such an small, intimate wedding means that only people who are very close to you are going to be there, and this is not the place for strangers. I would definitely call him and explain this and tell him he cannot bring his guest.



I'm with Lauren on this one.
AMGBride2008 Posted:

Re: Guest vent....what do you think?

I wouldn't not say anything either. Its your day, he's going to have a great time because he'll know everyone... he doesn't need a date there to make him at ease... also, the date isn't going to know anyone so that's weird for his date. Good luck!

eden Posted:

Re: Guest vent....what do you think?

if it's your friend i would say give him the message again, if it's ur FH's friend, let him do the talking...

it's very rude to take it upon urself to invite someone w/o the host's permission, no matter how large or small the affair.
Keywi231 Posted:

Re: Guest vent....what do you think?

i would say something...

LBride Posted:

Re: Guest vent....what do you think?

Personally, I would want to have the option to bring a guest if I'm single.. if you have a large group of singles maybe ok, but not if he's one of the only ones

tropicalbride07 Posted:

Re: Guest vent....what do you think?

it's my FH friend and I normally would feel it's impolite to invite someone withour a guest, but again if these are our closest 24 people in our lives and everyone knows eachother and it's more or a dinner party than a high energy wedding reception. Plus there is another friend who is married & going solo because the wife can't attend. So have another friend in the same group invite his own guest is rude in my opinion. He's a great guy and probably means no harm so I am not upset, I just wondered the opions of other brides. I don't care either way, but to know all the guests, but her is awkeward. MAybe he really likes her?

nala3378 Posted:

Re: Guest vent....what do you think?

I would contact your friend and explain to him that this is a smal wedding of 24 people and you would prefer to keep it at 24.

cherilicious16 Posted:

Re: Guest vent....what do you think?


Posted by nala3378

I would contact your friend and explain to him that this is a smal wedding of 24 people and you would prefer to keep it at 24.



Exactly. Maybe have a family member contact him on your behalf. There is a reason you are having a super small wedding and it is not up to him to ruin that vibe.
Mandyin2007 Posted:

Re: Guest vent....what do you think?

I would be annoyed if a guest took it upon themself to invite a guest. I would just explain to him that due to money and other restrictions that it would not be possible for him to bring a guest.

Bklyngrl Posted:

Re: Guest vent....what do you think?

especially since you're keeping it small - - we were trying to do the same and a couple of people asked if they could bring a guest (like dopes we said OK - they were strangers to us). P.S. one 'guest never showed', 'one guest & their guest' never even gave us a card (we paid for them) and another showed up bombed mid-reception (the hall had to rearrange the table seating etc...

thelastresort Posted:

Re: Guest vent....what do you think?

Normally, I would think that this is very rude. But, your having a DW, right? So maybe he has a new beau and wants to make a vacation out of this? Or he doesn't want to travel alone? Well, either way, it doesn't matter, he should have spoken to you first before he went and invited her.

tropicalbride07 Posted:

Re: Guest vent....what do you think?

no, we are no longer having the destination wedding. it's now sooner and smaller here in NY. I'm over it, and figured whatever, can't stress it!

TnOiOnL Posted:

Re: Guest vent....what do you think?

Honestly, I'd tell him- listen, NO guest. Sorry! If its your friend- you tell him or if it's FH's friend- he tells him.. I completely understand where you're coming from and it irritates the hell outta me! Especially for an intimate wedding.. some balls on that guy... grrrrr!!!!

Mooshyboo Posted:

Re: Guest vent....what do you think?


Posted by LaurenluvsTJ

Usually I would say that I don't agree not inviting people without guests, but the fact that you are having such an small, intimate wedding means that only people who are very close to you are going to be there, and this is not the place for strangers. I would definitely call him and explain this and tell him he cannot bring his guest.



I agree with you on this one...

(I have been on the receiving end of an invitation with no guest and I was dating someone & found out one of my cousins was bringing some chicey he was shortly dating ~ It was a terrible feeling) If I was the receiver on your invitation I would totally understand since it is such a small/intimate wedding and be honored to have received an invitation!

Good luck!

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