GUESTLIST HELL - Thanks to FH

So Fh and I are actively planning our wedding for early 2012. We are super excited and can't wait. I came home and said we need to work on our guestlist so we have a guessimated for a head count. We have a few issues:

1. Background: FH lost his mother at the age 3, and recently lost his 2nd mother so to say(grandmother) two years ago. She gave us a list of people for the wedding and everything. FH looks at the list and he like I don't know any of them. Also, they are all OTT. Do I invite them? I have no one on his mother side to confirm yes or no to invite and since they are 99% OTT, do I chance inviting them ;hoping they said no and just send a gift (so bad, sorry LOL).

2. FH father side is even smaller. I just did a rough count and it will be 11 people... REALLY?I guess this isn't an issues but like it really bad....

3. Now after the fun with the family, we move onto friends and this is where I went nuts. He invited everyone and anyone who crossed his pass. )I understand he lacking the family members but we are on budget and I was thinking 120 max for guests). He told he promise some guy he would invite him, and I am why did you do that and he giggled??

4. Who gets a guest? I have a lot of single friends and I really don't want to be paying for guest I don't know. Is that okay? I mean how do you word the invite to guaratnee no guest will be brought?


5. Since we have this issue with OTT we don't know, we were thinking of doing to set of invites with two different RSVP dates, so we see where we stay with the OTT and we can invite more friends ? Has anyone though of this and do you think it will work?

Sorry I didnt mean for this to be long but I been waiting all night for FH to leave to log on :)

ITA

We went from a guest list of 269 to about 130.
We cut out most of the OOT people cuz we knew they wouldn't come and we plan on sending them like a 'we're married' announcement.

Only the people who are in serious relationships and are older then 18 are getting '& guest' otherwise they are fresh out of luck.

FH & I are paying for this wedding ourselves, so we had to make alot of cuts!

Good luck!

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Posted by AutumnMrs2011

We went from a guest list of 269 to about 130.
We cut out most of the OOT people cuz we knew they wouldn't come and we plan on sending them like a 'we're married' announcement.

Only the people who are in serious relationships and are older then 18 are getting '& guest' otherwise they are fresh out of luck.

FH & I are paying for this wedding ourselves, so we had to make alot of cuts!

Good luck!

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did the OTT get cut because you push up the wedding though??

I feel bad, we sent them an engagement announcement (not my idea)

No the list was cut before we moved up the wedding cuz I had addressed all the STD's so I needed a correct count and revised list.

We had sent engagement announcements to everyone on the original list too, but like I said we will just send 'we're married' announcements.

I wouldn't chance it with the OOT. Talk to his family and see if they can cut down the list, explain to them your situation

as far 'guests' go, if you are not in a serious longterm relationship with someone you are not getting a guest

I will handle this by having the RSVP cards say just their name on it or possibly something like A seat has been reserved for you or 1 seat has been reserved for you or if its a family and im only inviting 2/4, then it it will say 2 seats have been reserved for you.... you get the idea

the people close to me I flat out told them that space is limited so no guests if you dont have a long term bf/gf

and you need to FH in check lol tell him he cant invite the world, I really feel strongly that people invited to your wedding should be those who are close to you and know and love you as a couple!

We are only inviting friends in serious relationships to allow a guest...and i prewarned my friends of this

And i told both sides of parents if the people you want to invited was not invited to my son's christenoing then they r not invited to the wedding

I'm only inviting friends with a guest if they are serious and I KNOW the significant other.

My dilemma is how to word it, because I'm having guests email or phone in their rsvp's