About a month ago my brother passed away very very suddenly. It was a terrible shock and my entire family is a mess. I am supposed to be doing all this wedding stuff and I just can't put my heart into. I'm afraid I never will be able to. I feel like the happiness that comes with planning a wedding is gone and i'm afraid it won't come back. The day he passed was our engagement party day...so needless to say it was cancelled. My family wants us to reschedule it b/c 'they need something to celebrate' but I just can't imagine it being a celebration without my brother. I'm sorry I am rambling...I just want to be able to enjoy this time. I know I should reschedule the engagement party, the place (milleridge carriage house) refunded the money. THey have been great. The wedding is a year from june. Should I reschedule?
lovergirl
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Re: Hard to be happy
I am so sorry to hear about the loss of your brother. That is a horrible to go through, especially around what is supposed to be such a happy time. Maybe I would give it a little more time before rescheduling the engagement party-especially since he passed on the day of the original. You will eventually feel happiness planning your wedding again, but it will take time. My thoughts & prayers are with you & your family during this horrible time.
kath
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Re: Hard to be happy
thank you that was very sweet
Happybride2005
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Re: Hard to be happy
I'm sorry for your loss. When you do get married, your brother will be looking over you. He would want you to be happy.
Boop2704
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Re: Hard to be happy
I know exactly how you feel. I too lost my brother and May 25th will mark 8 years he has been gone. Even though his death was so long ago, planning my wedding was so hard, because in my mind, he was supposed to be there. And I totally understand what you parents want you to do. They need something to celebrate. Because of the tragic loss of your brother, they need something to lift their spirits and having you, and being able to celebrate your engagement and be surrounded by family will truly help you all. After my brother died, we all went to a party down in Florida for my uncle. It was the best thing we did. Although the party was just one day, it took our minds off the loss of my brother and finally gave us a reason to smile. I think you should reschedule. Give everyone a reason to come together to celebrate. It will be one day that of course you'll miss your brother even more, but your whole family and all their love will be there to surround you. I am so so sorry for your loss!
violetfairy
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Re: Hard to be happy
Kath, I am so sorry. Yes, I think you should reschedule, but give yourself as much time as you need. Your brother will be there looking down on you, and he would want your family to celebrate your marriage, I'm sure.
kath
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Re: Hard to be happy
Thank you all so much for your caring words. It means alot to me!
janwinterbridejoy
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Re: Hard to be happy
im so sorry to hear about the loss of your brother. i think your family is right though i think that when someone passes on you should celebrate there life as much as you mourn there loss. im sure your brother would have wanted you to have your engagement party and a beautiful wedding . you should mention him in a toast or have a photograph of him on your table.
TeReSa8A
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Re: Hard to be happy
I am also very sorry for the loss of your brother. The other girls are right, your family and you need to get together and celebrate your life. I can't imagine how hard it must be for you, but I am sure your brother wouldn't want you to postpone everything. He is still with you in spirit, so try to be strong and go on with your plans. we are here for you on this board anytime.
Jax430
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Re: Hard to be happy
I am so sorry to hear about your loss. I can't imagine how hard it must be to plan a celebration like a wedding during such a difficult time. As far as the engagement party, I agree with whoever said you could put it off awhile longer until you feel ready for it. I can understand your family needs something to celebrate, but if it's not something you're emotionally ready for, you won't be able to enjoy it. There's nothing saying that you need to have an engagement party...many people don't. However, I can understand your family wanting and needing to celebrate something happy. Maybe you can do something a little more subdued or smaller than you originally planned. You have to do what feels right for you, while keeping in mind that your brother would want you to enjoy this special time in your life. He's with you in spirit
soon2bmrs2004
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Re: Hard to be happy
Posted by violetfairy
Kath, I am so sorry. Yes, I think you should reschedule, but give yourself as much time as you need. Your brother will be there looking down on you, and he would want your family to celebrate your marriage, I'm sure.
