Has anybody ever had a BAD experience with pre-cana?

We enjoyed pre-cana as well. It was very informative...and a chance to make friends as well!! Plus you do learn things about one another that you hadn't really ever thought to ask and therefore have never spoken about.

It's definitely worth taking the time to spend a weekend with nothing to do but talk to one another!

Good luck!


ETS: Our host couples actually did a candle lighting ceremony for each couple and said special prayers for us that were specifically about us. It was very nice. They also made us write love letters to one another and hold hands...very sweet. if anything, pre-cana fosters intimacy, it does not discourage it.

precana is not about being catholic..
its about making sure the couple knows each other before they get married..
they bring up topics so you two can discuss them

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Posted by tourist

Are those the friends' bad experiences you spoke of?

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That would be them.

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Posted by Anniegrl

I'm getting kind of nervous because FH is not Catholic and he's not happy with the fact that we HAVE to take pre-cana. He doesn't think it's right that any religious faith forces you do something in order to get married.
Did anybody have any bad experiences, or just thought pre-cana was a waste? I need to know what I'm in for!

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I'm not really sure I understand this much. If you are two different faiths and he is so against this, why get married in a church?

We attended the interfaith pre-cana (which I am assuming you are also?), and it was very fair. Yes they do discuss things that you may or may not believe in, like family planning, but pre-cana is all about what you make of it. A lot of the topics we discussed would not have come up if my husband didn't open his mouth. You take from it what you put in really.

The one thing that I didn't like about the interfaith pre-cana, was that it wasn't conducted by an interfaith couple. But, they were still very informative, and led a very good discussion and were very open to all opinions.

Go in with a positive outlook, I think your FH will be very pleasently surprised.

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Posted by cp0329

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Posted by tourist

Are those the friends' bad experiences you spoke of?

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That would be them.

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It seems like 90% are fine, 10 % are creepy.
I just have a feeling, that like your friends, my church is of the creepy variety.
We will try not to say anything that gives anyone a reason to yell at us.

It seems like most palces don't have the preist there. I wonder why mine does.

We are considering going in March or April- I think maybe March to get it over with.

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I'm not really sure I understand this much. If you are two different faiths and he is so against this, why get married in a church?

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Because even though FH doesn't agree that there should be any denominations of Christianity, he accepts that I am Catholic and I like being Catholic, and I wouldn't have it any other way then to be married in a church. He's fine with it now, but being raised a Bible- thumping southerner, it was kind of weird for him at first. He wasn't too happy about the pre-cana thing when I first told him, but now he's fine with it. He wants nothing more to make me happy, no matter what it takes. He's not even religious anymore either. He kind of fell by the wayside.
Anyway, I've never heard of interfaith pre-cana, but we'll see if my church even has it.

Ok ladies - it's quittin' time! Thanks for your input!

I'm sorry if that came off icky, I totally didn't mean it that way. If anyone understands the struggle behind all of this it's me! lol.

The diocese offers interfaith precana classes, they are usually listed in the same book as the regular classes. Just ask your preist!

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Posted by tourist
It seems like 90% are fine, 10 % are creepy.
I just have a feeling, that like your friends, my church is of the creepy variety.
We will try not to say anything that gives anyone a reason to yell at us.

It seems like most palces don't have the preist there. I wonder why mine does.

We are considering going in March or April- I think maybe March to get it over with.

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These 2 instances involved clergy conducting the pre-cana - one was a priest, one was a deacon. Which I found interesting.

I didn't realize the priest was even involved in pre-cana. Maybe that's the reason for the bad experience since priests are not married and don't have any life experience to discuss.

HEy tourist, if you go to the March class FH and I are enrolled in that class. You'll have company!!!!

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Posted by melanee

i think pre-cana really isn't to preach so much about the religion but to prepare couples on what to expect about married life...they talk about relationship, money, etc...

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Thats exactly what is in my opinion Pre Cana was not bad AT ALL!

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Posted by cp0329

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Posted by tourist
It seems like 90% are fine, 10 % are creepy.
I just have a feeling, that like your friends, my church is of the creepy variety.
We will try not to say anything that gives anyone a reason to yell at us.

It seems like most palces don't have the preist there. I wonder why mine does.

We are considering going in March or April- I think maybe March to get it over with.

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These 2 instances involved clergy conducting the pre-cana - one was a priest, one was a deacon. Which I found interesting.

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My Pre Cana was done in the school (at the church) It was hosted by a couple and a priest and 2 Deacons They were there everytime we went and the deacons wives were there also.