My friend whom I've known for over 10 yrs and asked to be a BM will not speak to me because (and I admit I was wrong) I sent her an e-card for her birthday. It was during the week, we had a huge thing that needed the whole security department working going on, and I guess I thought of our birthdays as not a big deal during the week, but we would celebrate on the weekend. Might I add, she never showed up when we were going out for my birthday.
Long story short, she hasnt spoken to myself or another girl (who's also getting married) in almost a month. She hasnt answered her phone, emails, nothing. She claims we are too busy with our own lives to bother with her...not true. I've been there for her through the darkest she's been through.
Was I wrong? I've made several attempts to reconcile with her, and she doesnt bother...I feel like sh*t because I even sent her an email inviting her to the beach this weekend, and no response...
Firkx3
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Re: has anyone in your BP gotten mad at you?
Try not to feel bad, you've made many attempts to make it right with her. She seems to be holding too much a grudge now. Does anyone really have time to get togher during the week for birthdays??!! I know i don't
egem523
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Re: has anyone in your BP gotten mad at you?
I honestly do not think you are wrong. I feel like that today everyone sends greeting electronically. The point is you did not forget and you had good intentions. I think society has made things so easy for like even sending a card via email. I think it is cute gesture and fun. I send to family for birthday's all the time now. For my birthday I barely got actual phone mostly text messages??? If you have time to text why not call but it does not bother at least they remember and I know they are coming from a good place. You have a valid reason for work too. Maybe she is bothered by something else.
DonnaPWhite1124
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Re: has anyone in your BP gotten mad at you?
You're right...we used to make a big thing in highschool about it, like decorating the lockers and such. But since we got older, we would wait till the Saturday after the bday and go out.
Fh said the same thing, she's holding a grudge, and shes scapegoating the 2 of us (me and my other friend) for reasons only she knows.
She didnt talk to me for a year once because my ex didnt say hi to her...yes we could all say thats a little crazy, but I got over it. But honestly, Im thinking now, this isnt worth it anymore.
DnJ0809
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Re: has anyone in your BP gotten mad at you?
I WISH I got an e-card for my bday. Usually I get nothing from friends except the occasional 'MySpace comment' or text message. She should be happy you remembered her bday. Weekdays are usually very hectic for everyone.
I hope she doesn't hold this grudge too long.
StefPalma
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Re: has anyone in your BP gotten mad at you?
you're not wrong AT ALL. i never send real cards, i always send e-cards. and, three of my BM's forgot my birthday this year since it was on a weekend and they all called or emailed me the next day and i didnt care. people get busy in their lives, it doesnt mean they dont care.
DonnaPWhite1124
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Re: has anyone in your BP gotten mad at you?
Thanks guys. I'm just miserable about it. i know its so stupid and petty, but Im a true friend especially to someone I've known since I was a kid. And I really dont like it when someone is upset with me. I mean if they are, they get over it shortly. But shes one of those stubborn people who wont ever admit to being wrong either.
SOTHISISLOVE53109
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Re: has anyone in your BP gotten mad at you?
People just need to relax...you have made the attempt to reconcile you can't beg her.
to get to your original question yes my FSIL hasn't talked to me in over 4 months, she told me I'm dead to cut and that I'll never be accepted into the family and that I'm a poor excuse for a woman, don't come over the house and don't come to any family events cause I'm no longer welcome...nice right? sure glad I asked her to be a BM...if I could take it back I would or I just might go on with the whole silence thing until after 5-31-09
VickiR510
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Re: has anyone in your BP gotten mad at you?
I know its hard because you have been friends for so long. But you have to realize that she probably feels out of the loop. Rather then tell you she is acting out by ignoring you both so that she can get some attention. I dont think you are wrong. You attempted to get in contact withher several times. I say wait it out. Maybe she will call you. If she doesnt in a week or two then leave a message about what she wants to do for your wedding. Wether she still wants to be apart of it.
By the way My sisters (2) are my MOH's of course we fight, but we stil love each other & would always be there for one another nomatter what!
JnA823
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Re: has anyone in your BP gotten mad at you?
I think that sometimes people can't just let things go... You at least acknowledged her birthday. As we get older and people have jobs and more commitments in their life it's hard to act like we did when we were younger. It might be something more then just the birthday thing. Maybe she feels left out since the people around her are getting married and she's not.
Future Mrs Roo
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Re: has anyone in your BP gotten mad at you?
I actually dont think you did anything wrong. you sent an e-card which means you acknowledge her birthday, what more did she want?
GT143EA
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Re: has anyone in your BP gotten mad at you?
Tell her to get over it! She's lucky you contacted her on her bday at all!
purplerain
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Re: has anyone in your BP gotten mad at you?
You did not do anything wrong! You remembered it was her birthday and you sent her a card (e-card or paper card makes no difference)!! I think shes annoyed about something else, try having it out with her. Good luck!
chicky724
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Re: has anyone in your BP gotten mad at you?
Nope, no one's gotten mad at me at all... but that's also bc I haven't asked anyone to be in the BP yet.
MrsInglima
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Re: has anyone in your BP gotten mad at you?
You sent her an e-card and she's angry at you? To me that seems a little silly. I don't even get cards from most of my BMs and my MOH hasn't given me a real gift since high school. She should be appreciative of the fact that you even remembered and are planning to get together with her to celebrate. It seems like if you've made all these attempts to reconcile this issue, there might be something a little bit deeper going on here.
flairforfashion
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Re: has anyone in your BP gotten mad at you?
Honestly, I think she's a little out of line to be pissed that you sent an E Card. I don't think you were wrong at all. I mean, people are so busy and the point that you remembered her birthday is the thing that makes people feel good. Maybe there is something else bugging her?
flairforfashion
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Re: has anyone in your BP gotten mad at you?
Posted by DnJ0809
I WISH I got an e-card for my bday. Usually I get nothing from friends except the occasional 'MySpace comment' or text message. She should be happy you remembered her bday. Weekdays are usually very hectic for everyone.
I hope she doesn't hold this grudge too long.
Same here- I get messages on Myspace and the occasional phone call. It s*cks that friends are so distant when we need them the most!
PoppedInASnap
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Re: has anyone in your BP gotten mad at you?
OMG an e-card is so nice!! I had alot of people FORGET MINE!!
DonnaPWhite1124
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Re: has anyone in your BP gotten mad at you?
Ya know what I really felt like doing calling her up and ripping her a new a s s hole because of all the things ive done for her and dealing with her childish nonsense.
She even came over to FILs house on christmas eve because she called me saying she was alone and had nothing to do. 5 months later you're gonna tell me I'm not a true friend? Fawk you biotch.
