So, I have a question about etiquette. My venue minimum is 120, and I'd like to stick as close to that as possible. Luckily, even with our extended list (and everyone getting their proper +1's..those with SO's that have been around for a while/fiancee's/married, etc) we are at about 155 people we would invite.
My mother (who is splitting paying for the event with my father) thinks that I should so A and B list invites. She said to send out 130 a little early originally, making the RSVP about 2 months before the wedding, then depending on how many no's I get, send out the rest, that way we don't end up way over.
I've heard from a few people who think that it's fine, but generally I seem to read that it's rude. I also feel like it would make it obvious to people that they were on the B-list, which again, is kind of rude as well.
What are your opinions? Is mom right, or should I just send them all out, seeing as I'll probably get a decent percentage of no's anyway?
lizzyro
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Having a B-List for Invites?
Hmm that's tough. Its hard to predict the amount of no's. I think as long as you don't wait too long to send out the second wave it's okay since you are sending out the first batch early
rcotter90
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Re: Having a B-List for Invites?
Posted by lizzyro
Hmm that's tough. Its hard to predict the amount of no's. I think as long as you don't wait too long to send out the second wave it's okay since you are sending out the first batch early
I agree. My plan is similar to your moms. We went 5k over budget already on venue and cannot afford to have more than the minimum they require. Ask your parents and future in-laws to looks through the list and see if they know of any that are definitely not going to come but have to be invited anyway.
haw4
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Having a B-List for Invites?
I think as long as you send out your invites early, and that the A list and B list people don't talk to each other about your wedding you should be fine.
Deirdre-and-Joe
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Re: Having a B-List for Invites?
If you sent all 155 people invites, the 'standard' 20% saying no would bring you to 124. That's just over your minimum. I'd look at your list again, I'm not a fan of a B-list personally.
Msatomrsb
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Having a B-List for Invites?
I am def doing a b list. I am trying really hard to stick to my 200 and I am so afraid to invite like 240 and have 240 come. I figure if i send invites early enough that as soon as I get a no I will send another one right out.
christinechristian
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Having a B-List for Invites?
I have to guarantee a minimum of 125 and my guest list is around 155-160. I am thinking we are going to invite everyone because I know there will be some No's. If you feel more comfortable doing a B list I don't think there is anything wrong with that! I for a fact know that I am going to have Nos but there are some people I am obligated to invite.
FBC81
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Having a B-List for Invites?
I am in the same situation. We want to keep our number as close to our minimum as possible. For financial reasons and for the fact that we just wanted a smaller-size wedding. We have hardly any people out of town, so I fear we will not get any no's. We will probably do a B-list but not with a different RSVP date. We will probably send out invites early and a few weeks later send out some B list if we start getting back no's.
Soon2BeMrsMango
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Re: Having a B-List for Invites?
Posted by Deirdre-and-Joe
If you sent all 155 people invites, the 'standard' 20% saying no would bring you to 124. That's just over your minimum. I'd look at your list again, I'm not a fan of a B-list personally.
this!
Jsabbatino
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Re: Having a B-List for Invites?
Posted by FBC81
I am in the same situation. We want to keep our number as close to our minimum as possible. For financial reasons and for the fact that we just wanted a smaller-size wedding. We have hardly any people out of town, so I fear we will not get any no's. We will probably do a B-list but not with a different RSVP date. We will probably send out invites early and a few weeks later send out some B list if we start getting back no's.
We are going to do the same thing. We have to guarantee 175 and would like to stay somewhat close to that. If we start receiving some no's back we will send out a few more
alissacataldo
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Re: Having a B-List for Invites?
We have to guarantee 130 and we are at about 150. I'm sending them all out, figuring that even if 15 people say no (which say is 7 couples), we are close enough to our minimum.
