Hello...and Help!!! (Long)

I've been lurking on these boards for a while, but can't resist the lure any longer.

I'm getting married in 152 days, and am stressed out and totally overwhelmed. FH and I got engaged in November 2004, but with all the Christmas stuff happening, we didn't get a chance to really start planning our wedding until last month. After looking and looking, we finally booked a place, but that's about it.

I've been trying on dresses like crazy, but haven't found anything I love enough to buy. We've looked at Something in Blue photographers and will most likely book them since I don't have the engergy to look at any more.

We just sent out half our STDs. Have no clue on the BM dresses, favors, DJ, limos, hair/makeup, programs, etc., etc., etc. To top it all off, we have to do a traditional Korean ceremony which is a whole other beast.

I want to just crawl under the blanket with FH and hope the wedding gets planned somehow. Just writing all of this out makes me freaked out. He's been so great about helping, but the problem is that I'm totally indesicive and can't figure out what I want. My parents aren't really helping me by saying things like 'your sister did this' and 'why don't you just use the place your sister did?' Said sister is the MoH and can't seem to get over her wedding 2 years ago. Other BM is great, but lives in DC.

Is anyone feeling like I am? I am so looking forward to marrying my darling FH, but don't know how I'm actually going to get there!

first off, breath! Everything will get done - even though it may seem it's a little rushed.

Check out the vedors on this board - and ask questions on the Vendor's board - a lot of them can give you quotes and information to help you narrow your search. Try finding dresses online, and then try them on at the store. Also, trust the ladies at the store. I wasn't interested in trying on any strapless dresses, but the lady at the bridal shop had me try on one - and it's the one I ended up choosing!

Good luck!

Oh you poor thing!

If it makes you feel anybetter I am getting married on the 3rd and I have only booked the place and the church. I am also very behind in the planning process. You have come to the right place for help in planning these girls are amazing and will help with whatever they can. All you have to do is ask..

So keep your chin up and get in gear. Your wedding day will be great!

Take a deep breath and relax! You just need to start one step at a time. Make a comprehensive list and do each task as it comes up. Start looking for invites, go bridesmaid shopping, and book the photographer. As you do each task, you will feel better. I live in CA and did all my planning online and booked my vendors within one week this summer. I also went dress shopping and found my dress that week. With the exception of one vendor who I replaced, I am thrilled with everyone I booked. Post questions and get advice. You can do this!!!

For me, it was incredibly helpful to break the wedding into smaller parts.

Once we chose the date, we realized that we only had eight months to go. I listed each month and assigned a few things to accomplish each month to keep it more manageable. I try not to worry about things until the right month, for example, last month's big item was invitations, this month's is flowers.

RELAX! Take one day at a time! u took the first step towards peaceful planning by asking for help!!!!
LIW is a great place to get ur ideas, The girls are wonderful here and they will help you along the way!

Good luck & Happy planning!!

Welcome aboard too!!

I agree with using the checklist on wedding channel.com It says what needs to be done when and will send you email reminders.

Also, concentrate on one thing at a time so you don't overwhelm yourself.

GOOD LUCK!!!

I think there's something wrong with me. I can't check the checklists on weddingchannel and theknot.com any more. I have so many 'past due' items on WC, it's almost funny! It just stressed me out to see all the stuff I haven't done yet. I think I'm self-defeating. Hah.

Thanks everyone for all the support and advice.

Besides the dress (since that takes a long time to come in) what should I try to do next? Flowers or photgraphy? How much in advance do invitations need to be ordered. I was hoping to get letterpressed invites.

How many places did you try for hair and makeup? Did you pick a place near your home or near the ceremony/reception site?

I can't wait for the honeymoon!

I ignore all knot/wedding channel/magazine lists. Please stop looking at them if they're stressing you out. Make your own list.

Flowers: Since you have to use a house florist, they go to the bottom of the list. Way at the bottom. Don't worry about them for a while. Ask your banquet manager to notify both house florists of your date and schedule appointments with them for way off in the distant future.

Photo/video: you may want to make it your goal to hire them by the end of this month. Many are already booked.

Invitations: involve less coordination than bm dresses. It's almost unheard of to need five months for invites, so don't worry about them today. Work on bm dresses instead.

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Posted by thefourth

Besides the dress (since that takes a long time to come in) what should I try to do next? Flowers or photgraphy? How much in advance do invitations need to be ordered. I was hoping to get letterpressed invites.

How many places did you try for hair and makeup? Did you pick a place near your home or near the ceremony/reception site?

I can't wait for the honeymoon!

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Hey there! Please let me know if I can help out with anything. I'm not sure where you're planning from but I've been visiting New Rochelle pretty frequently and have a good idea of which makeup/hair people from NYC and LI will/won't travel up there.

Definitely get your photographer done first. Since you can only choose between Arcadia and Diana Gould for flowers, IMO I think that can wait. Worst case scenario, they tell you that they're totally booked and you have to find someone else. This really isn't the 'worst' thing though since they're both a little overpriced (DG more so than Arcadia but DG seems more well-known/respected in the NYC-area if that matters for anything).

I would say the order should be dress, photographer, music, flowers. For invitations, here's a good timeline I found on the Not from a Box website:
How do I know when I need to place my order for invitations?
Here is general timeline, applicable to weddings and other special/formal events:

Count back 8 weeks from your wedding date. This is your Mailing Date.
Then count back an additional 2 weeks, to give yourself enough time to stuff and address your envelopes. This is your Delivery Date.
Count back another week for shipping. This is your Shipping Date.
Count back 4-6 weeks for printing, production, and assembly. This is your Order Date.
Example: May 31 event
Mailing Date: March 29
Delivery Date: March 15
Shipping Date: March 8
Order Date: Feb. 1 (or earlier)

Hope this helps!!

Take it one item at a time.

1. Dress - Make appointments with Bridal salons and be open to their suggestions. I was set on a simple a line dress and the Robin at Moonlight Couture made me try on others. She was so patient with me, I tried on half the dresses in the store. Well my dress is nothing like what I was looking for and absolutely perfect. I love it. Most of the bridal shops will be very helpful.

2. Bridesmaid Dresses - If you are having trouble deciding ask your girls for input. I am doing separates b/c I knew that I would never find the right dress for all my girls.

3. Photographer - These boards are great for info. I would search here and narrow it down and take it from there.

Don't worry, I am just as behind as you, and I am trying to plan from out of state.
I have the ceremony/reception site, and I just ordered my dress on Friday. My next step is BM dresses. My sister is working on finding a photographer and DJ but nothing is booked yet. And I am also working on the Florist, my aunt actually works at one, so I am hoping I can get them done there. But I am just taking everything I step at a time, and this site is a BIG help. You'll get in done!

I agree with everyone and I want to add:

Do you have it in the budget to hire a wedding coordinator? It might help alleviate alot of the stress if someone else can help you plan and get you going right now...

something to think about.

Thanks again everyone! You guys are really making me feel somewhat better.

I'm looking into hiring a 'day of' coordinator, but I don't really have the budget to hire an entire event coordinator. After finding out how much wedding stuff costs, I think I'm in the wrong profession!

Are most people getting a photography package? Is anyone hiring their photographer per hour? The photographer we're planning on using doesn't include albums in any of their packages. FH and I calculated that it would be less expensive to hire by the hour if the photographers were there less than 7 hours, but more cost efficient to do the package if they were going to be there more than 8 hours. Did you have your photgraphers stay to the end of the night, or did they leave after the cake cutting?

Jennie--where are you having your hair and makeup done? I'm having my ceremony at GIHC, so do I ask the stylist to come to New Rochelle? Are you getting dressed there? We booked GIHC for the whole day, so we're planning on taking pictures before the ceremony.

Thanks again everyone! This site is SO great!