HELLO.....You weren't invited!

Ok I can't take it! We invited over 250 people (our Max at Rh is 250) so obviously we are planning on some not showing...so far that is 3 people not coming...not good...

So anyhoo...My cousin who is 18 had her boyfriend email me and ask if he could come to the wedding! We did not invite any of the under 21 cousins with a guest because there are millions of 2nd cousins and some 1sts that we aren't in touch with costantly so we figured this would be fair and simply invited everyone as a family.

No he can't come, but I feel so bad saying so! Why do people put me in this situation???

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Posted by misbran

Ok I can't take it! We invited over 250 people (our Max at Rh is 250) so obviously we are planning on some not showing...so far that is 3 people not coming...not good...

So anyhoo...My cousin who is 18 had her boyfriend email me and ask if he could come to the wedding! We did not invite any of the under 21 cousins with a guest because there are millions of 2nd cousins and some 1sts that we aren't in touch with costantly so we figured this would be fair and simply invited everyone as a family.

No he can't come, but I feel so bad saying so! Why do people put me in this situation???

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I just had the same problem. I don't mean to be cheap but if I let all the18 year old cousins bring their boyfriends and girlfriends, I will be broke. Not at 120.00 a person anyway!

In this situation, you really have to put your foot down. Some one is going to get upset and so be it. I have the same issue and a couple of our guest decided not to come because we don't allow them to bring their kids. Cousin or friend, no exception. As far as I know this is my wedding (not trying to be a bridezilla) and we're paying for it.

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Posted by joan_db

In this situation, you really have to put your foot down. Some one is going to get upset and so be it. I have the same issue and a couple of our guest decided not to come because we don't allow them to bring their kids. Cousin or friend, no exception. As far as I know this is my wedding (not trying to be a bridezilla) and we're paying for it.

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I agree! We can't please everyone! Immediate fam are invited with kids, friends are not, all adults over the age of 21 are invited with guest, youngers are not....sorry we had to stop somewhere! Thanks for making me feel better about this!

I am in the same position. WE invited 260 and our hall holds 230 max. FFIL's friends decided to add their children to the invite that weren't invited.

We are going to call his dad and tell them that he is going to have to call his friend due to our occupancy issue

Don't worry about that...he can't come he can't come. I should had been you MOH because I have NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO PROBLEM SAYING NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO TO PEOPLE

On the serious side you can't please everyone. My son wants to bring his girlfriend and I said NO.

if the room holds 250 why are you nervous?
if you invited more than that i would be but you will be fine

my room holds 156 and i have 180 on the list and im freaking out

tell him sorry, you'd love to have him there.... but you are already over the max for your hall.

what the hell is wrong with people??? geezzz!

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Posted by diva7531

I would eplain that you are at your max for the hall and if later on you get a lot of no's he can come but as of right now it doesn't look good. That was completely unfair of your cousin to do that. I would forward the email to her as well!!!

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This is exactly what I would do.

Be very honest--say you have a 250 limit, and it's a hard limit, you can't go over. (I had my wedding at Timber Point, and you're definitely going to be tight at 250 people.) Say you're sorry, you hope to meet him or spend time with him at some other occasion, but no. If you make up excuses, or 'maybe if' possibilities, they may come back and bite you later, such as if the cousin hears that someone isn't coming, then you might get a 'Aunt Mary isn't coming, so now my BF can fit!' When of course you're counting on a few 'no' RSVPs.

Good luck! Especially since you're probably going to get more of these situations. People just don't get it, which is funny, you'd think that some of them just have had their own weddings, or been close to someone planning a wedding...

I hear ya ~ I actually did not invite my cousins (they are twins) who are in there early 20's with a date plus they change boyfriends like they change there underwear - it would be different if they were in a serious relationship or something... So I was telling my aunt none of her kids have RSVP'd she has 4 kids and she said well the twins are undecided on who to bring... I was like well they dont have to worry about it they were not invited with dates...so frustrating....

what does everyone think $$$ grows on trees...we are paying for our own wedding and now with FH layed off from work I want to say Wedding is cancelled... (no only kidding)