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HELP ME NOT KILL MY FH.

Original post by flibbertigibbet

FH likes to play what I call 'alarm clock olympics'

For example:

Say he has to be up at 7 am.

He sets his alarm for 6:15. He will snooze button, snooze button, snooze button in shorter more frequent bursts. So he will press the button maybe 5 or 6 times before he actually gets out of bed. But this is all planned.

Whereas, if I need to get up at at 7 am... I set the alarm for 7 am and get my body out of bed and awake... at 7 am.


We both have day jobs and when we move in together... we will need to be out of the house at approximately the same time. NEITHER of us are 'morning showerers'. We are both very 'get up and go'. That is... once he's actually 'up' he goes.

This is the ONLY thing I can see as being something I may actually verbally destroy him over out of sheer annoyance and anger. Verbally destory or possibly deck him in the face.

Because yes, its annoying to me... I don't live with him yet but I experience this with him at least once week and have for the past 2 and a half years when we've slept at eachother's places. It's annoying but it also makes me lose 30-45 minutes of sleep.

It'd be one thing if he was setting the alarm ONCE and waking me up ONCE to get up early. Because then I could fall back asleep for 45 minutes. But he's setting the alarm for four/five individual times and not even getting up out of bed. And sometimes, when it gets to 7 am - I still have to be like 'DUDE, AWAKE, PLEASE, GO, NOWWWWW'

I know there's a whole society of you snooze-button goons out there but... I don't feel I'm being unreasonable.

I know he's not doing it to bother me. But the way I see it is that if I got up 45 minutes before HE wanted to b awake and yelled for 30 seconds at a time loud enough to wake him up ... then went back to bed. He'd be quite annoyed.

Are there any other couples out there who have this situation? What can we do to let this not become a problem?

And before you respond:

1. I've already gotten lots of responses elsewhere online but I wanted to hear what you ladies have to say. But 'Just get up and shower when his first alarm goes off' is not what I see as a fair option. Losing 4.5 hours of precious morning sleep per week just because my FH is a zombie in the morning is not what I consider a fair compromise.

I am otherwise open to suggestions.

HELP
Michy2009 Posted:

Re: HELP ME NOT KILL MY FH.

Hi, my name is Michelle...and I am a snooze button goon....

I wish I had an answer for you....I drive my fiance totally insane with this!! What I do is set my cell phone to wake me up..the first time on ringer, all my resets on vibrate...but he still hears it!! It makes him crazy!!
Mommy2BeBride Posted:

Re: HELP ME NOT KILL MY FH.

No help here... I do the same thing your FH does.. I set my alarm for an hour earlier and snooze it like 5-6 times before I actually get out of bed. lol and My FH does the same as me..
Cacarina Posted:

Re: HELP ME NOT KILL MY FH.

Oh, I am a HUGE snoozer! It is so bad. I snooze for 15 minutes AFTER I needed to be out of bed too. NOT a morning person...it is the worst. DH is a morning person and can get out of bed so easily in the morning. Once my alarm goes off the first time, he is out of bed and in the living room watching tv...I am snoozing for another 20 minutes.

flibbertigibbet Posted:

Re: HELP ME NOT KILL MY FH.

The first year we were together I went to his house if we were spending a week night together.

Now he comes to my house... and I'm in charge of the alarm and so it's a little better.

Sometimes I'll wake up before the alarm even goes off and I'll just tell him 'Look this is your 10 minute warning' or whatever it is.

I use my cell phone for the alarm so once its off its off. But I know when he's at his house by himself... he's still doing the ol' snooze button olympics. I've told him before that it's not going to fly when we live together.

I just wanted to see what as many people as I could find would say so that when I bring this up again to actually have some sort of a 'plan of attack' conversation I have some productive ideas.

I think what we will do is...

If it turns out that we ARE needing to get out of the house at the same time...

One of us will have to becomea morning showerer. And maybe we can alernate. So, sometimes I get up and he gets to snooze on repeat and the other times he gets up and I actually get to sleep.

Or, I will tell him he can have ONE snooze but it has to be far enough away from the time I'm going to actually get up that I can actually fall back asleep within that window.

Or he could do a snooze with a vibrating alarm but maybe... wake up and go lay back on the couch after the first alarm.

I actually had A LOT of people on another board tell me 'you might just have to sleep in different bedrooms.' And I'm like ***, that's a worst-case scenario last-resort option.

Chanwich Posted:

Re: HELP ME NOT KILL MY FH.

I have the same problem and we have been living together for 4 years and it has not gotten any better! FH hits the snooze at least 5 times every morning when he has to get up. I've resorted to wearing construction grade earplugs which he got for me and throwing elbows after 2 snoozes go off. He gets pissed, I get pissed, we yell at each other half asleep, then once he gets up I fall back asleep. Am I exhausted during the day? Yes. Does it ****? Yes. But my body has slowly adjusted to it, and now sometimes I am even able to sleep through the snoozes. I know thats probably no help to you, but at least know there are people in the same boat as you!
jackieee Posted:

Re: HELP ME NOT KILL MY FH.

Posted by springsandra

DH sets two alarms -- one on the clock radio and the other on his iphone. The first one goes off and he gets out of bed and turns it off. When the second one goes off, he gets up.

So, yes, it's a single snooze alarm olympics thingy but it's not bad at all. After a few months of this, I actually sleep through it most mornings now.

Good luck working through your situation! He has to realize that you're a couple and there are some things you need to do for each other.

I used to do the 'listen to the radio in bed' thing for an hour in the morning and DH HATED it so I stopped. Compromise is the key to a happy married life together! Might as well start now!!


hahaha this is me. I have two alarms going, plus FH's alarm. Three alarms going off from 530 am to 715am ahhahah our poor neighbors
NYBride Posted:

Re: HELP ME NOT KILL MY FH.

This made me crack up because I am one of those people who puts their alarm clocks on for 7am and gets out of bed around 7:30-7:40am, I once thought about how ANNOYING it will be for FH when he gets up around 9-9:30am... I guess I'll have to make some changes and put my alarm clock on for later and maybe just hit the snooze 3 times instead of 6! LOL

HSsweethearts Posted:

Re: HELP ME NOT KILL MY FH.

I go through the SAME thing with FH, and I actually HATE alarm clocks, the sound stresses me out

MayBride2010 Posted:

Re: HELP ME NOT KILL MY FH.

aw....FH and I are exactly the opposite! I am the one who has to hit snooze for at least a half hour (otherwise I can't get up) in the morning -while he gets up the first time it goes off. I can't change it...at all, I have been that way forever. Luckily FH has gotten used to it and sleeps through it now...we were actually just talking about it yesterday too.

Good luck!
Soon2BMrsAlini Posted:

Re: HELP ME NOT KILL MY FH.

I HAD this issue also. Simple solution for me. I put the alarm clock on my side of the bed. It goes off, and I'll snooze it once for him. After that, it's shut off and I go back to sleep. If he goes back to sleep, he's screwed. It has been almost a year and it's worked so far. For a long time I got away with not snoozing at all cause I'd be like 'but I don't know where the button is'.... lol. But now I'll snooze it once for him but after that he's on his own. He definitely doesn't wanna be late for work so this works for us (me )
Iluvpoodles Posted:

Re: HELP ME NOT KILL MY FH.

You would hate me bc I'm the girl version of him lol. Only I don't hit the snooze button, I just get up half an hr later then I'm supposed to on the weekdays.

colEvapaige Posted:

Re: HELP ME NOT KILL MY FH.

Well my FH also is a snooze goon.

He will snooze for about 45 min to an hour. That means on the days I dont wake up before him (rarely) I am up when the alarm goes off and I f*king HATE it.

He actually is very aware of this and I think he is willing to compromise. He is going to have to.

I think you and he have to make a compramise. Itrs not fair to you that you have to wake up 45 min early because he cant get out of bed.

I would say tell him to start setting the alarm for 40 min instead of 45. Then 32, then 28, then 20, then 15. (or something that works). have him work himself up to one snooze instead of 2. Or 2 instead of 7.

tell him you are willing to compramise and get up a little earlier, but HE has to stop all the snoozing. Its not fair.

See if that might work for ya!
FutureMcBride Posted:

Re: HELP ME NOT KILL MY FH.

My fiance does the same exact thing and it drives me CRAZY. I seriously get so mad because on days when I am off and he has to work or when I have to wake up earlier than him he sets his alarm for seriously hours before. Not to mention that his alarm clock is half an hour fast. And it's set to this annoying jazz station that is so obnoxious and our neighbors probably hate us.

I am not sure if this was said already because I didn't get a chance to read all of the posts but What if you told himto just set the one alarm for when he needs to get up and you can tell him that you will help get him out of bed... does he set the alarm that way because he is afraid he won't get up? What if you tell him that you will literally shake him out of bed when his alarm goes off.... other than that I really don't know what you could do (other than separate beds of course which I am sure isn't an option)!

I don't know why I haven't done this with my FH but maybe I will strip him of his alarm clock privileges!

Good luck!
bluj786 Posted:

Re: HELP ME NOT KILL MY FH.

FH is like that, but he only it like 3 times. honestly when we first moved in together it drove me nuts, but now im soo use it i dont even know it goes off half the time. i only know hes up when he kisses me bye.

kimmaymb20 Posted:

Re: HELP ME NOT KILL MY FH.

sorry no help Im the one who sets one alarm at 6 and one at 7 and I dont wake up till 730-745 it drives everyone nuts but my bed is so comfy oh and the alarm clock is half hour fast!
whispersamethyst Posted:

Re: HELP ME NOT KILL MY FH.

OMG my fiance is the exact same way! It drives me nuts! We don't live together, but the times that I've slept over, he set his damn alarm about an hour earlier. Everytime I would fall back asleep, thinking he got up, the alarm would go off again and he'd roll over to hit the snooze button yet again.

The only way I think you can get around this is by having one alarm clock in which YOU set the time for. Get up a little earlier if you have to. I know when I do that, FH gets really annoyed when I turn the lights on, put the news on, and start talking to him. At that point he just wakes up in annoyance
futuremrsetch Posted:

Re: HELP ME NOT KILL MY FH.

Posted by springsandra

DH sets two alarms -- one on the clock radio and the other on his iphone. The first one goes off and he gets out of bed and turns it off. When the second one goes off, he gets up.

So, yes, it's a single snooze alarm olympics thingy but it's not bad at all. After a few months of this, I actually sleep through it most mornings now.

QUOTE]

My FH does the same thing.....He sets the alarm and his cell phone. He wakes about 45 minutes before I do and he sometimes forget sto turn the phone off but I def got used it lol

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