I have these three single older(40's and 50's) cousins that we are inviting to the wedding. At every function we ever go to they never have guests and we have never invited them to anything before with a guest. Now do you think we should invite them to the wedding with a guest? We never have before and we know they are not dating anybody. What would you do? Should we just invite with a guest or single? I have to mail out my invites this weekend, so Please help me. This is the only thing holding them up right now. Thanks!!!
jennyhet
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Re: HELP ME!!! What would you do in this situation??
I have the same dilemna--I just decided to invite w/guest out of courtsey to them. I know that they won't bring a guest, but I am not going to deny them that option.
franksbride
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Re: HELP ME!!! What would you do in this situation??
Why stress? If no one has ever invited them before with guests and they've never had problems and they are your cousins and they do not have significant others...just send the invite to them...no guest.
Now get those invites ready to be mailed...woo hoo!!!!!!!!
KathleenG
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Re: HELP ME!!! What would you do in this situation??
I agree. Invite them with guest out of courtesy. It is the safest bet!!
EvenEdan
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Re: HELP ME!!! What would you do in this situation??
I feel that adults should be invited with a guest regardless of their dating situation. If they feel comfortable coming alone, they will do so, if not they have the option of bringing someone, whether it is just a friend or a significant other. I think it is rude to invite an adult to a wedding without a guest.
minniebride14
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Re: HELP ME!!! What would you do in this situation??
With guests, I believe. Just to avoid any problems. Good luck!
BMD'sPeanut
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Re: HELP ME!!! What would you do in this situation??
I'm not inviting with guests unless the invitee has a significant other. I've checked all the books and this is not improper ettiquette. What I want to avoid is people searching for someone to bring to my wedding. It takes away from the intimacy that I want. If they feel annoyed at not being invited with a guest, then they don't have to come.
AliKing
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Re: HELP ME!!! What would you do in this situation??
Invite them with a guest. Chances are they will come solo, but at least you are giving them the option and they will totally appreciate that.
EvenEdan
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Re: HELP ME!!! What would you do in this situation??
Wanted to add something:
I went to a formal Engagement party a while back and at our table was a lovely woman in her fifties that came solo, she was not invited with a guest. She was nice and friendly and we made conversation at the table but alot of the time she just sat there quiet. Every once in a while everyone at the table would get up to dance and she would just be sitting there alone. She didn't seem to be enjoying herself and she even left before cake. I really felt sad when I looked at her and I thought it was pretty miserable that she, a full grown adult, didn't have the option of bringing a guest. She clearly would have been having a better time if she had a companion there with her. After that experience I know 100% without a doubt that I would never invite an adult to my affair without a guest. I recognize that some people may be more outgoing than others and many times the single person might know tons of people there at the event, but still they should be provided the option. I do believe that the people who are comfortable coming alone will, but the ones who might feel lonely will bring someone. I don't care what proper etiquette dictates, sometimes etiquette is outdated. This is JMO and lord knows there are plenty of people on this board that don't agree, as this thread has been posted many times.
ChristineC68
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Re: HELP ME!!! What would you do in this situation??
I say invite them with a guest.
EvenEdan - I agree 100% I have been that single woman sitting at a table by alone with couples. It was not fun and I could never put anyone in a similar situation.
btrflygrl
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Re: HELP ME!!! What would you do in this situation??
proper etiquette calls for anyone over the age of 16 to be invited with a guest and with their own invitation. I'm including guests for my 14-18 yr old guests also....to be nice (since one of the 17 yr olds is my brother....)
Kathy116
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Re: HELP ME!!! What would you do in this situation??
I agree that you should invite them with guests.
kathy2176
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Re: HELP ME!!! What would you do in this situation??
EvenEden, I am with you 100%. I don't see why they shouldn't be given the option. One of my aunt's didn't attend a family wedding because she was not given the option of a guest. She was so offended. She was seeing someone at the time as well.
BMD'sPeanut
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Re: HELP ME!!! What would you do in this situation??
since there is some disagreement about this...i would like it very much if you can find a specific ettiquette book that dictates what's been written about inviting guests with dates. all the books i've looked in have said you don't have to do it. besides why should she have THREE strangers at her wedding. her cousins can all mingle with each other. she mentioned they've done this before.
Boop2704
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Re: HELP ME!!! What would you do in this situation??
Well, thank you all for your advice. I think we are going to just go ahead and put with guest, even though we know they are not going to bring anyone. I guess just giving the option is a nice thing to do. I just hope they don't get insulted by it, since we know they are not dating anyone and they have never had anyone with them before. I don't know why I would think its insulting, it is just that we know them so well, and since they have never been invited with anyone before, I just feel like they are going to think we are kind of rubbing in their face that they have no one. Oh well, I guess I'll just hope for the best. Thank you all for you help!!!
