I just asked my dad if he would be offended if I had my step dad meet us half way down the aisle and have them both give me away... and he said:i guess if that is what u want but let me think a day or so on that. i was planning to give him half of the dance. which i thought would be a nice gesture I am totally freaking because I already asked my step dad!!! What should I do I am soooo upset right now!! help advice needed!!
MarcellaBella
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Re: Help please!!!
well, it;s your wedding day, and your father has to respect that.. wait a few days, and if he hasn't said anything, approach him on the matter and just tell him flat out that you telling him was more of forewarning, not a question..
good luck!
Jen_n_Dale
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Re: Help please!!!
why not have a special dance for your step dad? On walking down the aisle, that is a difficult thing. I think if you are close with your dad maybe it should just be with him. But maybe your step dad could do a reading??? Good luck!
shannon326
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Re: Help please!!!
I know I totally screwed up I should have told him not asked him... I have been putting this off for a while now because I didn't want to make him feel bad or anything and I messed up...
Jen_n_Dale
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I am sure your step dad will be totally understanding!!!!
shannon326
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I know my step dad will understand but the thing is I really want to have them both.
OctGroom
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Re: Help please!!!
I would do something to make your step-father feel special. When in doubt, just be honest with the gentleman. If you are 100% forthright and genuine.. and there's no reason you shouldn't be.. he'll respect what you say.
Don't get down on yourself if you made a 'mistake.' Frankly, I don't think it was a mistake. You were trying to do something good.. and when you attempt to do something like that, it means something. And people will recognize your thoughts for the wonderful and kind purpose that you had behind them.
GOOD LUCK!
MarcellaBella
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Re: Help please!!!
Posted by shannon326
I know my step dad will understand but the thing is I really want to have them both.
This is your wedding.. you shouldn't have to compromise.. once your dad thinks it through, he will understand..
One thing I learned when I was planning is that you cant please EVERYONE, inc. or shall I say especially your parents//
NYCHICK
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How about just letting them both have a dance, with 2 seaprate songs?
MrHostility
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Re: Help please!!!
Posted by NYCHICK
How about just letting them both have a dance, with 2 seaprate songs?
That's definately the way to go on the dance issue. As far as walking down the isle, do what you need to do. He can understand, or not. But it's your wedding. Explain you already asked him, because it would mean a lot to you. Your dad should understand.
Nora101004
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Maybe have you step dad walk you down the first part this way your dad gets to give you away.
wc0143
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Why not have both walk you down? one on each side!
jar823
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Re: Help please!!!
My sister is having our step father and our dad walk her down the aisle. One on each side. I opted to only have my father do that. (my personal decision) But we are each doing seperate dances with them, to different songs. Maybe your father feels like if he walks you down the first half, he would feel like he is giving you away to your sepfather, not to your husband. I would either have them both walk you the whole way, or have your step dad, start and half way he can give you away to your dad, who then can give you away to your FH.
am I making any sense????????
neesiepie
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Re: Help please!!!
I think your father also should have something reserved just for him, ya know? In your attempt not to exclude your stepdad, you kind of took away a little bit of your father's time to shine...ya know? I mean, it's not like you did it with bad intentions...but maybe you can explain to your step dad that it really meant a lot to your father to walk you down the aisle and you misjudged and just didnt realize how much it meant to him. MAybe ask you stepfather if he would be upset if just your father walked down with you? I think if you have a good relationship with your stepdad, he will understand. And then, I would have a special dance reserved just for your step dad. If you cant do this without offending and hurting your stepdad, then have him walk you halfway down the aisle, hand you off to your dad and have your dad give you away.....
cocoa
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Re: Help please!!!
i like the idea of having your step dad bring you to your dad who then gives you away. you are honoring both, which is important. i also like the idea of having a dance for each. believe me, i am with you. i have my dad, my stepdad and my grandpa!!! all three men are important and i don't want to slap the face of any of them. good luck with your decision and they both sound like good men, so they will be understanding.
butterfly20
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Re: Help please!!!
what about both them walking you down? one on each arm?
also ... instead of 'half' a dance, I would say two dances, one for your dad, then one for your step dad, i think thats a beautiful gesture
