Help... suggestions on what to do, to modify crying it out (CIO).

Mishy626 Posted: Mar 02, 2005 07:26 AM

Help... suggestions on what to do, to modify crying it out (CIO).

My son is now waking up every hour to hour and a half. My DH and I are walking zombies, I've had a headache for a week straight now that won't go away, and I can't stay up past my son's bedtime because we are so tired. I hate to have him Cry It Out but I feel we may be doing something that is only going to lead to future problems and have this problem continue.

He wakes, starts to whimper, and we run so he doesn't wake fully, and give him the pacifier. Last night, just to see if he could soothe himself back to sleep, we waited 3 minutes and the cry got louder and more intense.

Are we doing the right thing by getting up and always giving him the pacifier? How can we get this to change? He is 5 months 1 week old. Should we start letting him cry for a couple mintues before getting up, and if so, do we give him the pacifier when we do get up, or just try to pat him back to sleep. I don't think this would work. Any suggestions on what to do to break him of this habit. He is also waking so early now, between 4:30 and 5:30 every morning now.

Please help! Thanks.

DaniRN Posted: Mar 02, 2005 08:04 AM

Re: Help... suggestions on what to do, to modify crying it out (CIO).

I don't think I would run in at every whimper.
My dd just turned 6 months-her bedtime is usually 8pm but for some reason she will start crying in her crib every night at about 10 or 11pm-not sure if it's teething pain, or what but we wait it out, after about 5 or 10 minutes she'll just start whimpering then go right back into a sound sleep till 7 or 8am.

emilain Posted: Mar 02, 2005 09:06 AM

Re: Help... suggestions on what to do, to modify crying it out (CIO).

The crying it out thing never worked for my daughter, (she HATED the ferber method, every time I'd go back in her room to console her she would get soooo pisst when I'd leave), so I modified it a little and laid down on her floor, so she could see I was there and I could see that she was fine, and finally she learned to go to sleep. I did this for 2 nights and by the 3rd night she slept through the night, sometimes I'd have to go in but I'd grab my pillow and blanket so I could get some sleep as she did, but she learned I was not going to pick her up, and I laid on the floor with my back toher so she could she I was not paying attention to her.

The pacifier c an be a nasty little thing, I'd make him break that habit quick if he can't keep it in his mouth. I started taking the pacifier out of my daughter's mouth as soon as she fell asleep then she got use to not having it, plus it is dangerous to have them sleep with it without superivsion (if it comes apart they can choke). Good luck, this will pass, but he may need your help in becoming adjusted to a new routine.

flyin'bride Posted: Mar 02, 2005 02:41 PM

Re: Help... suggestions on what to do, to modify crying it out (CIO).

Our 5-month-old son goes to bed at 8:30 p.m. At around 1:30 - 2:00 a.m. he wakes up and just needs a pacifier or a couple of 'shhhs' to go back to sleep. He doesn't go to sleep with the pacifier and after he falls back asleep, (usually takes about a minute), the pacifier falls out of his mouth and we take it out of the crib. We stopped the feeding at that time so I think he still needs to adjust his sleeping routine.

He does stir a little bit here and there but as long as he doesn't get to 'Level 3' we let him fall back to sleep on his own. My husband is the one who came up with the 'levels'. 'Level 1' is when our son makes some noises or groans a couple of times in a row. He'll do this then usually falls back to sleep. 'Level 2' is when he lets out a couple of light cries in a row. He'll usually fall back to sleep after doing this too. 'Level 3' is the 'come get me now' cry. If he makes it to Level 3 we go and get him. With our son, if he is crying like that, something is bothering him (hunger, teeth, stuffy nose, etc.). We don't let him CIO at that level. BTW, he gets up at 5:30 a.m. to eat and then goes back to sleep until 6:30-7:00 (when we leave for work/daycare).

Good luck with your little boy! Hang in there, I'm sure he will settle into a routine soon and give mommy and daddy some much needed sleep!

Dee7772 Posted: Mar 02, 2005 02:53 PM

Re: Help... suggestions on what to do, to modify crying it out (CIO).

Posted by flyin'bride

Our 5-month-old son goes to bed at 8:30 p.m. At around 1:30 - 2:00 a.m. he wakes up and just needs a pacifier or a couple of 'shhhs' to go back to sleep. He doesn't go to sleep with the pacifier and after he falls back asleep, (usually takes about a minute), the pacifier falls out of his mouth and we take it out of the crib. We stopped the feeding at that time so I think he still needs to adjust his sleeping routine.

He does stir a little bit here and there but as long as he doesn't get to 'Level 3' we let him fall back to sleep on his own. My husband is the one who came up with the 'levels'. 'Level 1' is when our son makes some noises or groans a couple of times in a row. He'll do this then usually falls back to sleep. 'Level 2' is when he lets out a couple of light cries in a row. He'll usually fall back to sleep after doing this too. 'Level 3' is the 'come get me now' cry. If he makes it to Level 3 we go and get him. With our son, if he is crying like that, something is bothering him (hunger, teeth, stuffy nose, etc.). We don't let him CIO at that level. BTW, he gets up at 5:30 a.m. to eat and then goes back to sleep until 6:30-7:00 (when we leave for work/daycare).

Good luck with your little boy! Hang in there, I'm sure he will settle into a routine soon and give mommy and daddy some much needed sleep!

at what age did your son/daughter settle into a routine? My son will be 4 months old in a little over a week. I am still having such a hard time getting into a routine. His sleeping pattern over the past 2 weeks, has been crazy. I just can't wait to get into that 'routine'.

flyin'bride Posted: Mar 02, 2005 03:07 PM

Re: Help... suggestions on what to do, to modify crying it out (CIO).

He got into his routine just about 1.5 - 2 weeks before he turned 5 months. He's never had any trouble going to sleep at 8:30, he just wanted to wake up and eat a lot.

Florenze Posted: Mar 02, 2005 11:52 PM

Re: Help... suggestions on what to do, to modify crying it out (CIO).

I feel your pain. Andrew WAS a horrible sleeper! We had such a hard time with him. From 0-5 months he would only sleep in his infant carrier. He hated the crib and bassient, but he slept like an angel in the infant carrier. He got too big for the carrier and the only way we were able to get him sleep was in our bed. Which, wasn't that bad, because I was BF and supplementing. So whenever he would wake up hungrary it was so convient. That lasted for about 3 months and our sex life was almost dead. When Andrew was 8 1/2 mths old I went back to work and decided that it was time to try the crib. It was Extremely hard the first 2 weeks, but well worth it. Andrew is now 11 months and sleeps in his crib! I usually put him to bed at 9pm and he'll sleep until 11:30am. Yes, he crys when I put in him in his crib, but as soon as I leave the room he's quiet. I guess he now realizes mom means business. What ever you decide to do be consitent and don't expect a lot from a 5mth old all babies are different and the they say boys in general aren't good sleepers.

What-Now Posted: Mar 03, 2005 10:05 AM

Re: Help... suggestions on what to do, to modify crying it out (CIO).

Posted by Florenze
they say boys in general aren't good sleepers.

oy! really???

emilain Posted: Mar 03, 2005 11:07 AM

Re: Help... suggestions on what to do, to modify crying it out (CIO).

Posted by WhatNow?

Posted by Florenze
they say boys in general aren't good sleepers.

oy! really???

I have never heard this, I in fact have read in medical Journals the total opposite and the researchers related it to higher amounts of energy. On average, boys are more energietic than girls so their rest is much deeper because the 'play harder'. I guess everyone is different, but all the boys that I know are much better sleepers than the girls I know. Everyone is different I guess!

What-Now Posted: Mar 03, 2005 11:11 AM

Re: Help... suggestions on what to do, to modify crying it out (CIO).

Posted by emilain

Posted by WhatNow?

Posted by Florenze
they say boys in general aren't good sleepers.

oy! really???

I have never heard this, I in fact have read in medical Journals the total opposite and the researchers related it to higher amounts of energy. On average, boys are more energietic than girls so their rest is much deeper because the 'play harder'. I guess everyone is different, but all the boys that I know are much better sleepers than the girls I know. Everyone is different I guess!

See, that's what I heard too, that boys are better sleepers and also throw less tantrums. I heard it from parents who have both gender kids. I hope it's true!

Florenze Posted: Mar 03, 2005 01:23 PM

Re: Help... suggestions on what to do, to modify crying it out (CIO).

I actually read that boys weren't good sleepers in 'Sleeping through the night'. by Dr. Mindell. She also mentioned that boys are also more likely to die of sids and are more likely to develop illness. After reading that I was glad Andrew woke up every 3 hours!!! Each child is different and you can't believe everything we read.