Help with a so called friend\

Ok, need your help ladies and also need to vent.

I have this friend I've known forever. We've drifted over the last couple of years. She is def. a selfish person at times.

Ok, so a two weeks ago she left me a message at work and I didn't return her call (been super busy), then she left me a message saying why I didn't return her call. I then responsed with 'I've been super busy at work, got a promotion, and my DH's Nana passed away and I've been really busy'. So, now its like almost 2 weeks later and nothing, no call, no message.

Its kinda bothing me because last night I was talking to another friend and they mentioned why I didn't go to my other friend Tri Race (she's an athlete). I responsed with how busy I've been and she said that my friend would have liked me to go.

Ok, its pisses me off because here's a friend who has yet seen my new place (which I was super excited for) and moved into over 6 mos ago, never responded back with a 'I'm sorry for your loss' about my DH's Nana death (meanwhile my other friends were amazing), and never said 'Congrats' for my promotion which everyone knew I busted my hump for. I've been to several of her 'Tri' Race things.

She's such a selfish friend, but the lack of communication about my DH's Grandmother really set me off.

Should I say anything? Is it even worth it? I just really didn't like hearing about it through another friend, you know...


Thanks

Honestly, it sounds like this friend is a loose friend now. Not someone whom you're as close to as you once were.

If you continue with the relationship, keep it simple. And if she raises that you haven't been there for her, you have every right to spin that back on her.

Good luck, Kerry!

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Posted by ewickens

Honestly, it sounds like this friend is a loose friend now. Not someone whom you're as close to as you once were.

If you continue with the relationship, keep it simple. And if she raises that you haven't been there for her, you have every right to spin that back on her.

Good luck, Kerry!

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yea, the LIF gals made me realize its not even worth it. She's not a friend who cares about my boring life (ie marriage, babies, homes, etc). I have enough friends that do, especially you all!

Thanks Betsy!

I had a friend like this. She was supposed to be in my wedding and ended up backing out because 'the other girls are better friends with you.' ...as if that is true! The friendship became one sided with me calling her all the time and me having to extend the friendship back to her. In the end, I tried to talk to her several times about how I was feeling and she kept putting it back on me. I was angry about this but I decided to just stop putting in the effort. And, we haven't spoken since (2 years ago).

I think that you could try to talk to her about how you are feeling, but if she doesn't respond or at least validate how you are feeling, then she isn't really a friend at all.

Omg Kerry, I'm so sorry for your DH's nana!!!!!!!!!!! I remember you posting that she was very sick but I must've missed you posting that she had passed on.

As for this 'friend', it might make you feel better to confront her and go off on her about how much she's hurt you. But if she's not worth it, and it sounds like you've already decided that she isn't, then it's best to just let things go and enjoy the real friends that you do have. Cut her loose and don't look back!!

Thanks Cindy. I appreciate it!

It was a rough road, but at least she's not in pain anymore.

I think I'm not going to bring it up to my friend, we'll see if she gets the message....