How can I explain this?

So I asked FH to find out who his parents wanted to send STDs to. Their reply was, 'why wouldn't we just send them to everyone?' My response to him was that we only want to send them to people on our A++ list so that in the event that we have to cut people, they haven't received a STD. He's still confused. I guess they don't do STDs in PA.

Did anyone else have this problem? How did you explain it to FH and FILs?

we're also having the same problem.. coz of worries how ppl would feel if we just decided to invite them just coz other ppl couldn't make it. dunno how they'd feel being second choices.

Laura, you are 100% right. You can't send people on your 'B' list a STD. What if all of your A's RSVP yes

Tell FH to tell his parents that these can only go to people that are on the A list and OOT guests bc it could make for a potentially embarassing/awkward situation if you send them to EVERYONE that you are considering inviting. I'm sure he'll get it

sorry.. i meant we were wondering how to notify the B list of the std. by the time we decide on sending out the b list its probably best to just send out the actual invite instead.

were you planning on sending out the std to your b list or just sending out the invite?

I sent out my STDS to everyone!!!! I'm having a hard time finding 150 people to come to my wedding, I want to make sure I can make the minimum! I ahve a very very small family and so does FH so I'm hoping everyone we invite will attend! But you're right if you're trying to be conservative with the people you invite then I would only send it out to the most important people.
XOXOXO
Kitty

LOL, oh boy Laura!! Some people just DON'T get it, huh?? Geez, well I would just explain to them that you would LOVE to have everyone at your wedding but you either can't afford to have the entire world or your place cannot accomodate it... then try to get them to understand that you also have a minimum to guarantee so if the most important (first wave of your list) people for some reason can't make it, you start taking from the next wave of people just to make sure you have enough. i would then explain that you only want to send the STD's out to the people that are DEFINITELY invited just incase you DON'T need to reach from the second (or third LOL) waves those people are not offended because they think they are getting invited b/c they have an STD but they are not...

Lord, I hope that works!! I'm sure they will understand once you explain it that way. I mean, tell them you would love to send them out to everyone but unfortunately you don't know who will or will not RSVP... so there is no way of knowing and being able to do that, you are not a psychic you know?! haha... HTH and good luck!!


ETA: me personally, we have a huge guest list with a big guarantee so I did what you did, STD's to the immediate people-- most important people who I knew were invited no matter what and that includes the important OOT guests so they have a heads up-- and the 'B List' is not getting them just incase we have TOO many people and we need to start trimming the tree-- b/c we have a guarantee of 215-- but knowing FIL's side everyone will come so then if we have 230-- YIKES, i don't even want to think about it-- but you understand, so I'm doing the same thing you are!