engaged and newlyweds----what do you do to keep the relationship from feeling like you've been married for 30 years...?????
MrsTC
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Re: how do you keep your fiance happy?
keep the laughter flowing, a sense of humor, a shoulder to cry on, remember you're a team, keep the spark alive ....the rest I will let you know after 30 years! Or I can ask my parents...they have been married for 29 and together for 32 years!
Anniegrl
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Re: how do you keep your fiance happy?
I try not to nag him too much. He's such a great guy; he's so good to me, but there are times when I want to wring his neck. It's then that I have to remember that he's just a guy and tries so hard to please me, so I just calm down and let it roll off my back. It's hard, but the last thing I want to do is make him feel like he's not good enough, you know? I think guys can be sensitive like that....
aliasPook
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Re: how do you keep your fiance happy?
I try to treat him the same way I treated him when we were only dating a month. I know what he likes and dilsikes and I know he loves to be spoiled. Even though we have been together six years already, I don't think it should be any different from day one?
Anniegrl
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Re: how do you keep your fiance happy?
aliasPook - I agree and I wish FH would feel the same way! I tell him that I would love for him to treat me the way he treated me when we were first dating. He kept his room clean, he was super sweet to me and paid a lot of attention to me, bought me little gifts.....*sigh*. Well, he's still really good to me but he's comfortable now and doesn't feel like working that hard anymore, so he says. Men!
xjulietx
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Re: how do you keep your fiance happy?
We sing silly songs (Monday night after our dance lesson where we were tangoing and he was spelling out T-A-N-G-O I switched to B-I-N-G-O and we sang about Bingo the dog) We laughed so hard I felt like a little girl.
I also scratch his back, which instantly puts a smile on his face. I have never seen a facial expression change so quickly yet so genuinely.
Overall, we try to be silly and laugh and go on 'dates'. I think going on real dates (dinner, movies, mini-golf or some activity) is really healthy. It keeps the romance alive. When you prepare for a date it reminds you that you shouldn't take each other for granted just because you have been together for a while.
aliasPook
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Re: how do you keep your fiance happy?
Annie~Don't be sad! I was havign the same problems as you a few years ago so we broke up for five months and he came back a changed person. We hardly ever argue anymore and now if he or I do something that the otehr person doesn't like, we tell eachother right away. He is great now. He use dto be a jerk...
And I think having puppiues has softened him. He is a mush now and he also sings to the dogs.
nrvbrd
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Re: how do you keep your fiance happy?
We both laugh alot. We crack each other up.
I try not to be a nag, which is something I am guilty of. I learn to pick my battles with him.
I give him his space and let him do his own thing.
We are constantly finding new ways to re invent our relationship- we have been together 10 years for goodness sake. We try new things, we go new places etc etc.
We just always try and have fun and keep the frienship alive.
Anniegrl
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Re: how do you keep your fiance happy?
Oh I'm not sad! It just bugs me sometimes how I do all these things for him and then he does nothing for me in return, unless I ask him which is no fun. I would love for him to surprise me with flowers or plan a date for us. For some reason he was able to do this in the beginning but now it's become 'hard' for him. He's really busy with work and school so I'm giving him a break for now! But, I told him that relationships are hard work and you shouldn't take them for granted. You should show your mate every now and then how much you appreciate them. If I cook him dinner, do his laundry and all this other stuff, he could at least buy me flowers once a month darn it!
aliasPook
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Re: how do you keep your fiance happy?
That's a very good point!!!! I give him space. I trust him and as long as he is not neglecting me, I let him go out with his friends, play pool and softball, Rangers games and whatever else he wants to do. We have teh rest of our lives to be togetehr, a couple of days without him at home won't kill me!
aliasPook
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Re: how do you keep your fiance happy?
Wow, it's been a while since I got those! But he does take me on shopping sprees. He is ggod though, we plan dates. I don't get surprises like taht anymore, but we do different things. Please don't think he is not a pig, I do it all. But I have gotten him to cooking for us. That is one less thing I have to do at night.
And he is going on strike with Verizon on 8/2, so I told him, he will be teh house husband. I expect the house to be IMMACULATE when I get home and he promised that it woudl be, laundry, dishes and all...so I will keep you posted.
WithThisRing
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Re: how do you keep your fiance happy?
a lot of laughter and a lot of sillyness. We make date nights, movie nights, and just relaxing nights.
We always try and find the humor or the brighter side of things. If I am upset he will above and beyond to make me smile.
We always make sure to laugh, smile and be there for each other. No matter how hectic a day can get, or a week can get we always try to have at least 5 minutes of just us. No tv, no phone, just us sitting there and smiling at each other.
butterfly20
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Re: how do you keep your fiance happy?
bumping
februarybride
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Re: how do you keep your fiance happy?
Keeping things alive takes work...and every now and then we get a little lazy. It's important to be friends and to remember that! We try not to take things too seriously...
I think the fact that my DH travels a lot, keeps things new. We get to really miss eachother and appreciate eachother.
kmcwed
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Re: how do you keep your fiance happy?
Since we aren't living together YET, it really still feels like we're dating...
I guess that's one of the positives of our situation! LOL!!
HeatherandNick
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Re: how do you keep your fiance happy?
laughter is key. Nothing can be taken to seriously. I also think giving him space helps out too. He has his thing, I have mine and then we have ours. There is no need to do every little thing togehter
mattnnic327
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Re: how do you keep your fiance happy?
We always laugh at each others stupid and private jokes and that only we get,, It's funny and we can always make the other feel really good.. We always play Say what Karoake in the car .. He tries to Stump me!!!
MrsTC
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Re: how do you keep your fiance happy?
yes I totally agree - that is one BIG thing I have learned - pick your battles. And try not to nag so much - I catch myself doing that. And every now and then I throw in something special and unexpected - like a little present etc
