How do you know it's time? (Just kind of a vent!)

kazee525 Posted: Jun 13, 2007 01:01 PM

How do you know it's time? (Just kind of a vent!)

I always thought I would be one of those people who wanted a big family and to be a young mom. I got married when I was 27 - and I thought for sure, in one year we would start trying. A year passed, and I felt like we were having too much fun to have kids. Then another year passed, same thing. I love being with my husband and we have this private little world going on....This summer will be our 3rd anniversary. I am starting to think I may be ready - but then I talk to friends with kids (and believe me, they all have them!) - and I feel like, No that is not what I want - I am afraid of losing my own identity. I want to still be known as ME, not only as so-and-so's mom. I am also facing a ridiculous amount of pressure from my MIL to produce a grandchild, and I know it sounds spiteful, but part of me doesn't want to get pregnant because of her - not really, but I feel like she never comes over or calls now, but if I got pregnant, she would show up at my doorstep all the time.
So DH and I have discussed it and we keep saying soon, soon....I feel like if I was genuinely ready, these thoughts and fears would not matter to me....

sparkle Posted: Jun 20, 2007 10:49 PM

Re: How do you know it's time? (Just kind of a vent!)

I totally 100% know what you are talking about. I am not married yet and I am only 25, so my opinion might not count too much, but I just know I am going to feel the same way after I get married next year. I ALREADY get really pissy when people (especially FH's mom) make little comments about babies. It makes me so angry. Do I just look like a freakin baby machine?! Will I only matter when I start popping out kids?? Ugh it gets me so angry, I can't even begin! Sometimes I want to be like '@#$% you, I'm not having kids, NOW what???' and see what she says lol

I agree too, I just want to spend time with my husband when we get married and do what WE want for a while - travel, go out, etc (if we have enough money - unlikely ) It's like, you're finally married, is it so wrong to want it to just be you two?!

Well sorry my reply turned more into a major rant
but yea the point is that I totally know where you are coming from! Everyone is different and I don't think there is anything wrong with feeling this way!!!