how much on average do you give combined

lrs2005 Posted: Mar 30, 2005 11:53 PM

how much on average do you give combined

Ok, this might be sensitive topic, but on average for a friend how much do you give combined as presents for bridal shower and wedding gifts if you are not in the wedding party and both you and DF are attending the wedding?

marymoon Posted: Mar 31, 2005 12:03 AM

Re: how much on average do you give combined

it all depends. I usually spend $50 on a shower gift, and then I give around 200 for the wedding, but I've given much more and much less, depending on my closeness and my finanial situation at the time. Like for one cousin's wedding, who I'm not close with at all (had barely even met before) I gave $125 because I'm still in college, they weren't paying for the wedding,a nd they were MUCH older than me..but for a cousin who was my age and just getting married right out of college, paying for part of the wedding, I felt they needed it more, so I gave $300, but would have given more if I could have afforded it. Maybe I shouldn;t think this way. But I'm at a stage where FH and I are not really well established financially, so if it's someone much more established than we are, I'll give less. If they're really not established, I feel more inclined to give a bigger gift, because I feel like they need it more. Does that make sense?
Maybe I just feel for them more b/c I'm in thier situation and I know how difficult it can be.

AJsMommy122 Posted: Mar 31, 2005 01:55 AM

Re: how much on average do you give combined

I usually dont spend less then $100 for the shower and at least $200 - $250 for the wedding.

AnniesSS Posted: Mar 31, 2005 08:29 AM

Re: how much on average do you give combined

I try to sped less then $100 for the shower, but give at least $100 per person at the wedding

Jan05Bride Posted: Mar 31, 2005 08:40 AM

Re: how much on average do you give combined

About $100 for the engagement, $100 for the shower and about $300-$400 for the wedding.
Plus bachelor / bachelorette parties

JimmysBride Posted: Mar 31, 2005 09:29 AM

Re: how much on average do you give combined

I would give around a $100 gift for the shower and around a $200 gift for the wedding. More depending on who it is.

july06bride Posted: Mar 31, 2005 10:20 AM

Re: how much on average do you give combined

FH and I went/go to all
past two weddings i did not attend showers (not invited) and we gave 250 (one was a ct wedding one was a li wedding)

my good friend from college is getting married and i bought her a setting of her china-and lingerie-a bit over a hundred and for wedding i was thinking 300.00
we are pretty close
i think each situation depends on closeness of people and financial situation i dont THINK there is a set #

kia74 Posted: Mar 31, 2005 10:26 AM

Re: how much on average do you give combined

at least $100 for BS and $250 for wedding

suven Posted: Mar 31, 2005 10:28 AM

Re: how much on average do you give combined

I have scaled it down since my wedding.

I used to give $100 toward a shower gift and between $200-$350 as a wedding gift for friends.

Now, I will give $50 for a shower gift and $200 from me and DH at the wedding.

again, this is for friends, not family or if we're in the bridal party.

Jan05Bride Posted: Mar 31, 2005 10:39 AM

Re: how much on average do you give combined

I'm adding that since the wedding for any future couple I now will 'match' what people gave me ... except for my little cousins and such who are in college and are struggling - they'll get tons from me.

nferrandi Posted: Mar 31, 2005 10:49 AM

Re: how much on average do you give combined

I usually spend between $50-100 for the shower gift and we usually give $300 for the wedding. DH's brother's wedding is in a couple of months, so that will obviously be a much different story- we'll be over $1000 on that one.

BridalBliss Posted: Mar 31, 2005 12:22 PM

Re: how much on average do you give combined

I usually spend between $50-100 for the shower gift and we usually give $300 for the wedding.

Ditto for me!

DMcK Posted: Mar 31, 2005 12:32 PM

Re: how much on average do you give combined

Posted by Jan05Bride

About $100 for the engagement, $100 for the shower and about $300-$400 for the wedding.
Plus bachelor / bachelorette parties

Same here

VS11 Posted: Mar 31, 2005 01:55 PM

Re: how much on average do you give combined

Family and friends are differnet amounts

family shower 150.00 (usually place setting)
family wedding 350-400

friends shower 100.00
friends wedding 250.00

Nautical bride Posted: Mar 31, 2005 02:02 PM

Re: how much on average do you give combined

Get this -
We just got a combined shower and wedding gift from DH's family (includes mother, two brothers and their families, sister and her family, and grandma - total of 12 people) and the whole gift totaled $350!!!

I might add they are not from the NY metro area and people have very different ideas of what to give around the country, but c'mon. They are immediate FAMILY and are not contributing to our wedding in any other way!

akaMrsT Posted: Mar 31, 2005 02:18 PM

Re: how much on average do you give combined

Posted by lrs2005

Ok, this might be sensitive topic, but on average for a friend how much do you give combined as presents for bridal shower and wedding gifts if you are not in the wedding party and both you and DF are attending the wedding?

I have not been to a bridal shower since like 1990 so I can't answer that part. Most of my close friends are single or were married well before I met them. Baby showers are a different story.

We have only been invited to a few weddings (Bahamas, Rhode Island & NY) as a couple and I went to all but 1 alone. I personally don't have an average amount that I give and would have to say it depends on what we can afford.

ssdbk Posted: Apr 01, 2005 01:21 PM

Re: how much on average do you give combined

I don't want to add it up..........don't want to think about it! But......up to or about 100 for an engagement or shower, up to $450 for a wedding, usually about $300.

suven Posted: Apr 01, 2005 02:16 PM

Re: how much on average do you give combined

Posted by Nautical bride

Get this -
We just got a combined shower and wedding gift from DH's family (includes mother, two brothers and their families, sister and her family, and grandma - total of 12 people) and the whole gift totaled $350!!!

I might add they are not from the NY metro area and people have very different ideas of what to give around the country, but c'mon. They are immediate FAMILY and are not contributing to our wedding in any other way!

I can top that! When one of my step-cousins got married, I was a college student working a crummy part time job. I still scrounged up a $100 bill to give her as her shower gift. And, my father gave her $1,000 for her wedding gift to cover him, his wife, me, and DH (we weren't even engaged, yet and were both in school).

When it was my turn, I got NOTHING for my shower. For the wedding, her, her husband, her sister, and their mother and father gave me a miniature Waterford Vase that was on clearance at Macy's for $45. On top of that, her mother works at Macy's and got 20% off of the $45 gift.

So, from 5 people, I got a $36 wedding gift.

IF she was mad at me for 'adding my name' to my Father's wedding gift to her, she could have AT LEAST given back the $100 cash gift that I gave her for her shower.