I do believe age is just a number, but one of my 25 year old friends is dating a 43 year old. We recently hung out as a group, and he had nothing in common with my DH (28), or DH's friends. They still play video games, etc...I just started thinking that having couple friends as a couple with such a large age difference would be difficult--she told me his friends mostly have kids already, some already in their late teens...The wives and girlfriends of his friends don't take her seriously since she is so much younger...They are at a totally different stage of life than she is at right now...So how old is too old? What is the greatest age difference you have ever dated? I dated someone 6 years older, but he was still doing his medical residency so was still somewhat in 'school' mentality, and I was in college...
MuchInLuvMichi
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Re: How old is too old in terms of dating?
i dated someone who is 36 and I am 23 and it was totally fine..it just depends what ur into and what u want out of life..but sometimes the age diff is soooo great it just cant even compare to understand what that person has already been threw or hasnt experienced yet...
violet
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Re: How old is too old in terms of dating?
I don't think there's such thing as too old. It doesn't matter if the guy your friend is dating has nothing in common with her friends, just as long as him and her have something in common and are getting along.
Kathy116
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Re: How old is too old in terms of dating?
This topic is so relevant to me!
I am 28, and my DH is 49!
There is a 21 year age difference between us, but we rarely notice.
Our friends are all inbetween our ages... around mid to late thirties. I've always had much older friends...some of my college friends (who are also 28) love him, but we don't see each other because they live in Virginia.
The only other time I notice an age difference, or I realize that there is one, is when I'm with his brothers...he has an older brother who is in his early 50s, and he has college age children!
My DH has never been married before, has no children, so I don't have anything that really reminds me of his age...he's the most wonderful man I know.
wc0143
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Re: How old is too old in terms of dating?
My ex before DH was 12 years older than me and the only time we had an issue was when he turned 40 and decided to stop calling me!!! Doesn't the midlife crisis usually make you want a young chippy for a girlfriend?
nov04LIbride
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Re: How old is too old in terms of dating?
Posted by wc0143
My ex before DH was 12 years older than me and the only time we had an issue was when he turned 40 and decided to stop calling me!!! Doesn't the midlife crisis usually make you want a young chippy for a girlfriend?
Was he picking them up in high school then!? Was this the guy you continued to use as your dentist!?
usuk2004
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Re: How old is too old in terms of dating?
I think it really depends on the guy. I dated a guy taht was about four years older than me when I was a sophomore in college and I really felt that difference - we just had a different mentality. But DH is four years older than me (we met when I was 23 and he was 27) and I never noticed any difference at all.
Just before I met Seb (okay, so they overlapped for a week or two ) I was seeing this guy who was about 10 years older than me. And that kind of freaked me out. But, I think it freaked me out most because he was 34 and didn't really have it all together in terms of career, life decisions, etc. Not that Seb did either, but he was only 27 at the time. Does that make any sense? I guess it just wasn't meant to be because about a year later, I saw his wedding announcement in the NY Times! I guess he found everything he wanted in someone else and I did too!
Calla
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Re: How old is too old in terms of dating?
I think it depends on what age you are starting with, as its about being in the same stage of life. I can not see a relationship between a 25 year old and 43 year old -- especially if she wants children.
xjulietx
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Re: How old is too old in terms of dating?
I think the gap closes up as you get older. I think a 21 and 31 year old couple might have less in common than a 40 and 50 year old couple. I think life experiences play an important role too. if you both have them or both don't, it can change your maturity level.
wc0143
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Re: How old is too old in terms of dating?
YES!! This was the dentist ... very odd & twisted tale!
I was 26 when we started dating in 1994 ... he gaev me the 'I can't get out of 2nd gear' speech the week following his 40th birthday in Sept 96 (fine, I had also just scraped the right side of his Explorer along a concrete pole in the garage but ...).
So we didn't talk for a while, then he called a few times after I started seeing Tim and he came by my apartment to bring me some framed poster I always wanted. He called me after he left and told me he wanted me back, things would be different, if it meant getting a ring blah blah blah ... but I said no
usuk2004
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Re: How old is too old in terms of dating?
Posted by wc0143
YES!! This was the dentist ... very odd & twisted tale!
I was 26 when we started dating in 1994 ... he gaev me the 'I can't get out of 2nd gear' speech the week following his 40th birthday in Sept 96 (fine, I had also just scraped the right side of his Explorer along a concrete pole in the garage but ...).
So we didn't talk for a while, then he called a few times after I started seeing Tim and he came by my apartment to bring me some framed poster I always wanted. He called me after he left and told me he wanted me back, things would be different, if it meant getting a ring blah blah blah ... but I said no
good for you!
And to think, he'll be 50 next year!!!!
Kathy116
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Re: How old is too old in terms of dating?
wc0143
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Re: How old is too old in terms of dating?
Posted by usuk2004
Posted by wc0143
YES!! This was the dentist ... very odd & twisted tale!
I was 26 when we started dating in 1994 ... he gaev me the 'I can't get out of 2nd gear' speech the week following his 40th birthday in Sept 96 (fine, I had also just scraped the right side of his Explorer along a concrete pole in the garage but ...).
So we didn't talk for a while, then he called a few times after I started seeing Tim and he came by my apartment to bring me some framed poster I always wanted. He called me after he left and told me he wanted me back, things would be different, if it meant getting a ring blah blah blah ... but I said no
good for you!
And to think, he'll be 50 next year!!!!
And he's still alone!
nov04LIbride
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Re: How old is too old in terms of dating?
Posted by wc0143
YES!! This was the dentist ... very odd & twisted tale!
I was 26 when we started dating in 1994 ... he gaev me the 'I can't get out of 2nd gear' speech the week following his 40th birthday in Sept 96 (fine, I had also just scraped the right side of his Explorer along a concrete pole in the garage but ...).
So we didn't talk for a while, then he called a few times after I started seeing Tim and he came by my apartment to bring me some framed poster I always wanted. He called me after he left and told me he wanted me back, things would be different, if it meant getting a ring blah blah blah ... but I said no
That's crazy! And I can't believe you and Tim use him as your dentist! Are you suurreee you need those fillings he tells you about!?
wc0143
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Re: How old is too old in terms of dating?
Posted by nov04LIbride
That's crazy! And I can't believe you and Tim use him as your dentist! Are you suurreee you need those fillings he tells you about!?
Ah, the things I've done in a dentist chair ...
nov04LIbride
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Re: How old is too old in terms of dating?
Posted by wc0143
Posted by nov04LIbride
That's crazy! And I can't believe you and Tim use him as your dentist! Are you suurreee you need those fillings he tells you about!?
Ah, the things I've done in a dentist chair ...
Hope he washes those chairs down! Ewwww!!!!!
Robeymuse
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Re: How old is too old in terms of dating?
I once dated someone 18 years older than me briefly. But I had a long relationship with a guy 16 years older than me. I loved it. He was such a great guy. IMO, Age is just a number. My DH is 5 years older than me...but I always loved older men.
070502
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Re: How old is too old in terms of dating?
I think dating is fine.. but marriage is slighty different.
My parents are 10 years apart... (Go, Dad for dating your bosses secretary way back 30 something years ago!) 22 and 32
I always had the older Dad but whatever it had it's advantages and disavantages over the younger ones and he was still and is the best Dad.
But now when I look at their marriage it seems harder now because they always had us kids in common and you never saw the age gap but now add that my Dad is retired and my mom feels to young to not work little things have crept up on them. My Dad is more set in his ways and my Mom is still active. But alas they will soon be Grandparents and can't wait and that is firing my Dad up again.
And even though in my eyes they have a perfect marriage and is part of the reason I felt so 100% secure marrying my husband at 23...but it may also be part of the reason why my husband is is a mere 30 days younger then me!
I think you can make anything work these days and who cares if it's just dating if they are in love and even in marriage who cares if they are happy they already are doing GREAT!
Kate07
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Re: How old is too old in terms of dating?
Posted by 070502 My parents are 10 years apart... (Go, Dad for dating your bosses secretary way back 30 something years ago!) 22 and 32
I always had the older Dad but whatever it had it's advantages and disavantages over the younger ones and he was still and is the best Dad.
But now when I look at their marriage it seems harder now because they always had us kids in common and you never saw the age gap but now add that my Dad is retired and my mom feels to young to not work little things have crept up on them. My Dad is more set in his ways and my Mom is still active.
My Mom is two years older than Dad. He always seemed older than her to me. I guess because she was always the fun one. She's 18 at heart, which is great. Now they are approaching retirement and Mom was always the social butterfly and active and Dad is still the type that just wants to be home. I kind of feel bad for my mom in that sense. I'm hoping things will change but I doubt it,
When I was in college I know two guys that were born when their fathers were over 50! (and I thought my parents were old - they were in their mid-thirties when I was born). One Mom is like 13 years younger and the other is 20 years younger. I think over the years there was less in common - the Dad 20 years older sleeps on the couch as long as the guy could remember. The other Dad is in bed at like 7:30 at night. Maybe that's just men !!!
cocoa
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Re: How old is too old in terms of dating?
i was 'with' someone about 20 years older and with kids and while it was nice having someone who had a house, a car that worked, and real food, i also feel he was using me in a lot of ways. while i am old in terms of being responsible and working, i am also young mentally...sometimes i think i belong with my 5th graders. but it does come down to state of mind.
