I have a friend who lives out of state. Her family still lives here. On several occasions she has made mention of bringing her son (he will be 2 at the time) to my wedding. We are not planning on inviting children AT ALL. My fh has a big family, and we are not inviting the children. The only kids that will be there, are my FG and RB.
It really hasnt been said to me directly.. example: My other friend just came out about her pregnancy on facebook. Out of state friend said 'COngratulations! It will be so great when our kids can play together at Kristy's wedding!' um... no it wont be :) There have been several other comments along the same lines. How the heck do I address this??? HELP!
SimHawk8
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Re: How should I handle this?
You have to be honest and let your guest know it is an adult only affair.
Jessc4985
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Re: How should I handle this?
I agree, just be upfront and honest with them.
FutureMrsLots
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Re: How should I handle this?
I agree...just tell her that you don't want to hurt her feelings, but you weren't going to have any children there. I love how people that have children just automatically assume they are invited. Don't parents want a night out?!?!
HoopsnYoyo
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Re: How should I handle this?
Posted by MzBridezilla32
You have to be honest and let your guest know it is an adult only affair.
You have to let them know NOW! I told people already that my wedding is an adult only reception, so they can find a sitter.
ellie424
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Re: How should I handle this?
Posted by MzBridezilla32
You have to be honest and let your guest know it is an adult only affair.
ITA! Better to let them know ASAP especially because they are already planning on bringing their children.
springsandra
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Re: How should I handle this?
I definitely agree with the other posters that you have to let them know now... however, I would definitely NOT go posting on FB in response to their posts about how it's adult only!
I would suggest this: email them both together and tell them that you are so happy they're already making plans to attend your wedding and you can't wait to see them and meet their children, but that the reception itself is going to be adults only. But explain that you'd be happy to help them in finding a local babysitter who can stay with their children at the hotel (or something along those lines) so they can enjoy your adult only reception without having to worry about the children.
Your wedding is in the evening anyway and kids that age usually go to sleep pretty early, so they should be able to understand.
FutureMrsTlasek
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Re: How should I handle this?
I agree with everyone else, be upfront and honest. I see no problem having a no kid wedding. I think I am going to experience the same problem...but am planning on giving out #s for nanny agencies for parents.
mybabylovesmoi
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Re: How should I handle this?
Since she hasn't said anything to you directly, it's a PERFECT opportunity to beat her to the punch and casually mention it to her in you next conversation such as, 'Just to keep you up to date, FH and I have been letting all our friends with children know now that we are having an adults only celebration. That way, our friends have plenty of time to plan.'
Moonmist09
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Re: How should I handle this?
Just a word of advice: none of this has been said to you directly, and from you have mentioned, no one has actually asked you directly either if the kids could come to the wedding. Your wedding is still over a year away, so there is plenty of time to let people know whether or not kids will be invited to the wedding or not.
with that said, many people let their guests know on the invitation by putting 'Adult reception' on the invitation so this clues in their guests.
once invitations go oout, people will automatically start to call and ask if they can bring their children, this is when you or someone in your family, depending on who receives the call - will let them know that for whatever reason, children are not invited. This same thing happened to me during the planning of my first wedding (which never happened) and worked fine.
also, when addressing your invitations, make sure you put 'Mr & Mrs. John Doe' not Mr. & Mrs. John Doe & Family' this will also let the recipient know who exactly is invited.
Notwedyet08
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Re: How should I handle this?
I agree-be honest. Since she has family here then it's not going to be that hard for her to find someone to watch the baby durng the wedding. Make sure you put adult reception on the invitation-and hope the word gets to her b4 that, that you aren't having any kids.
Notwedyet08
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Re: How should I handle this?
Posted by mybabylovesmoi
Since she hasn't said anything to you directly, it's a PERFECT opportunity to beat her to the punch and casually mention it to her in you next conversation such as, 'Just to keep you up to date, FH and I have been letting all our friends with children know now that we are having an adults only celebration. That way, our friends have plenty of time to plan.'
Perfect example! You've got plenty of time-this is a great way to go about it!
KN2011
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Re: How should I handle this?
Thanks for your advice. I'm thinking if she finds out he's not invited she won't come, but I guess that's her own choice. I'm not having children from our families so I certainly can't have friends kids. Why do people assume?? My other friend that she said that to was like ummm I'm getting a babysitter!!!!
adelya21
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Re: How should I handle this?
I agree that you have to let them know up front!!!! I am not sure if maybe a mass email to most of the guests that have children will be okay saying that your wedding is an adults only reception?
FutureMrsDe
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Re: How should I handle this?
just say it on the invitations that its Adults only! and address the invitations directly to him.
KN2011
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Re: How should I handle this?
Thanks Ladies! Im sure it will come up again, since my wedding is over a year away. Ill just have to address it at that point.
JuneBride14
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Re: How should I handle this?
Posted by Notwedyet08
Posted by mybabylovesmoi
Since she hasn't said anything to you directly, it's a PERFECT opportunity to beat her to the punch and casually mention it to her in you next conversation such as, 'Just to keep you up to date, FH and I have been letting all our friends with children know now that we are having an adults only celebration. That way, our friends have plenty of time to plan.'
Perfect example! You've got plenty of time-this is a great way to go about it!
