How to honor deceased parents...

I just went thru this. Both my Mom and dad are deceased , and it was hard to have something to honor them. I did not want it to be morbid, and I did not want to be shedding tears of saddness on my wedding day, so this is what I did.
A few days before the wedding I put my throw away bouquet on there grave site , ( another girl on this site gave me the idea.) , I made sure I had my moms sterling silver bible put into my bouquet for the ceromony, I renacted some poses they had for there wedding and I am going to somehow incorpoarte it into my final album with 1 or 2 of there wedding photos, and I also had right after my first dance song, I had there wedding song played right after mine, and the DJ just said, 'at the bride and grooms' request please join us for the song, 'More'. This way no one was crying and I was able to remember them without anyone pitying me.
Hope this helps. Fm mail me anytime if you need to talk.

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Posted by hbradio

Is your mom re-married? If not, maybe you want to put their wedding picture on your guest book table?

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Yea, she's remarried. Step-dad is walking me down, but brother is dancing with me. Hmm... I'm not sure if step-dad would mind the picture of my parent's wedding day displayed... I'm sure he would understand... we have a big picture of my dad displayed in the livingroom, and he's never complained.

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Posted by chichila15

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Posted by hbradio

Is your mom re-married? If not, maybe you want to put their wedding picture on your guest book table?

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Yea, she's remarried. Step-dad is walking me down, but brother is dancing with me. Hmm... I'm not sure if step-dad would mind the picture of my parent's wedding day displayed... I'm sure he would understand... we have a big picture of my dad displayed in the livingroom, and he's never complained.

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In that case, maybe that would be nice? Just a suggestion! If I were you, Id sew a piece of a shirt he loved into my gown or pin a little picture of him inside the gown. I am getting all sad for you now....

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Posted by hbradio

In that case, maybe that would be nice? Just a suggestion! If I were you, Id sew a piece of a shirt he loved into my gown or pin a little picture of him inside the gown. I am getting all sad for you now....

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It's a sad thing... but it's life. Those were really great suggestions... and I might do them all! lol...

That is a beautiful idea to honor them.

My FSIL lost her mother and put a poem in her program and was going to have someone read it. The poem was called 'When Tomorrow Starts Without Me'. It was really beautiful.

I am wearing my grandfather's tie tac under my dress. do you have something like that in honor?
but my minister is going to say before the unity candle that we would like ot keep in our hearts these people

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Posted by aimerliny

Hi

My FH lost his father November, 2003, and I lost my father in February. We KNOW how you feel.

Since we are not getting married in our church, our officiant is leading everyone in a short meditation in the beginning of our ceremony saying something like this:

““It is the Bride & Groom's wish that before we begin today you all join with them in a brief moment of remembrance.”

You may begin, by closing your eyes, and allowing yourself, to feel all the love and joy that radiates from each of you and fills this place. Remember now, the loved ones, who could not be with us today. See them in your minds eye, sitting among us in their rightful places, beaming with pride, rejoicing for that which Bride and Groom have found in each other and sharing in the love and joy that is this day. Secure in the knowledge that they are all loved and remembered.”

Maybe you can do something like that at the beginning of your reception.

We also plan to put something in our program.

Hope this helps!

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OMG I KNEW you must be using April from CoAW!!! We are too!!! And she is doing the same for me --- well for my dad and grandmother.
Isn't she the best????

I had little things that remembered my parents.
I wore my Mother's engagement ring on a chain.

I had 3 red roses in the center of my bouquet. 1 for each parent & 1 for my Nana.

My husband had a red rose on his boutiner for his Dad.

I had a picture of my parents & DH parents on the alter. (It was also on our table at the reception)

We had them mentioned during the ceremony

The back of my program had a dedication & an Irish blessing.

Thanks for having this thread. I have been thinking the same thing. My FH's mom passed away a few months before we got engaged and we haven't really been able to really really grieve yet (almost 2 years by the way. We have more like, come to terms with it and go on. But everytime I think about it my eyes start to well up.

But to everyones point, I still want to honor her. But wanted something there which would not make me sad if I were to see it. If you know what I mean. The only thing I saw that I can bear with is a vase bud with a message engraved on it to remember her. Which I will simply put a rose in, where it would sit, I have yet to decide.

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Posted by Karacg

OMG I KNEW you must be using April from CoAW!!! We are too!!! And she is doing the same for me --- well for my dad and grandmother.
Isn't she the best????

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Yes, we are using April. I was a little nervous when we first met her, but she is such an eloquant speaker, and so knowledgable about other cultures, so that even though we are not having a 'religious ceremony' it will be spiritual. I've been in the process of fine tuning our ceremony script that she provided for the last few days. She is fabulous!

We are using a memorial candle from either www.printedcandle.com or www.theprintedcandle.com - I always forget which it is.

We have on for my sister and one for his father.

I had DH's mother's & sister's momgrams embroidered on to my slip and didn't tell him about it until he saw me dressed (both passed away in the last year).

Like someone else mentioned, we put my bouquet at his sister's grave and our table flowers at his parents grave (his father passed away when he was a child).