How would you feel if one of your BMs wasn't coming to your Bachelorette Party?
EvenEdan
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How would you feel if one of your BMs wasn't coming to your Bachelorette Party?
I am in a wedding party this October but because it is so soon after my own wedding, I won't be in town for the Bachelorette Party. I missed her Engagement Party too because I was out of town for my mom's 60th Birthday celebration. I feel terrible about this. In my opinion, a bridesmaid, especially one that's a good friend, should be there for all the wedding related moments. I know my friend totally understands, but I am still bummed. I would be so sad if one of my BMs didn't make it to mine.
nj42305
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Re: How would you feel if one of your BMs wasn't coming to your Bachelorette Party?
Don't get too down on yourself. What's really important is that you 'want' to be there but unfortunately, the timing of the engagement party and bachelorette party was and is incompatible with your schedule. It happens! Why don't you try to make it up to her somehow...maybe plan an afternoon together, go get your nails done, go for a facial , even just plan for lunch. The fact that this bothers you is enough in my mind to recognize that you are indeed a good friend
suven
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Re: How would you feel if one of your BMs wasn't coming to your Bachelorette Party?
From my own perspective, I was very sad that my best friend (who is the maid of honor) was not at my shower...
hbradio
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Re: How would you feel if one of your BMs wasn't coming to your Bachelorette Party?
I am sure she realizes that you just didnt decide to sit at home and not attend, you have other very important events that obviously cant be rescheduled. I have 3 OOT BMs and when I asked them to be BMs I told them that I would COMPLETELY understand if they couldnt make it to the shower or bachlorette party due to money or other constraints.
brideinapril
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Re: How would you feel if one of your BMs wasn't coming to your Bachelorette Party?
I didn't go to one of my best friends bachelorette party's - I felt terribly about it, but I had my own reasons. In the end I think she understood, 6 years later we are still friends.
August2004
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Re: How would you feel if one of your BMs wasn't coming to your Bachelorette Party?
do something extra special for her on your own then. Like, take her out to movie and a dinner or do a spa day with her to make up for it. I think it is sweet that you feel so bad about it. I am sure she will understand, but I would just try to do something on my own with her if I could then.
september2004
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Re: How would you feel if one of your BMs wasn't coming to your Bachelorette Party?
i ordered one of my BM's not to make any special trips. it's too much $$ in travel (she's in san francisco), all i want is for her to be there on the big day. we will try to coordinate the 'bridal brunch' on a weekend she is in town, but if we can't coordinate it around her schedule, i don't expect her to be there...
tourist
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Re: How would you feel if one of your BMs wasn't coming to your Bachelorette Party?
i wouldn't be offened. in your position I might be offended that they didn't try & workit around all teh Bms schedules, but sometimes that doesn't work out. If I have one at all, my BMs won't be at mine. My MOH is in San Diego & my Bm is only 16.
PrincessRose
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Re: How would you feel if one of your BMs wasn't coming to your Bachelorette Party?
Three of my BMs won't make it to my Shower or Bachelorette party because they live too far out of town (Florida, Arizona, and one is moving to California). To tell the truth, I'm feeling pretty bummed about it.
Thing is, I feel like I'm the one being selfish about it. How could I Possibly expect them to fly here TWICE?!
Re: How would you feel if one of your BMs wasn't coming to your Bachelorette Party?
I would be sad if my good friend wasnt there but I would also understand if there was a reason she wasnt. One of my BMs isnt going to be at my bachlorette party because she will be only 20 years old. Now I guess thats a good reason.
Dont feel too bad, make it up to her by having a special girls night out with the 2 of you or something.
may04bride
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Re: How would you feel if one of your BMs wasn't coming to your Bachelorette Party?
I just had one of my bachlorette parties this past weekend. We all went to Florida for the weekend. It was great. 2 of my BM's couldn't go. I was fine with this. They felt bad but I completely understood why they couldn't be there. We are all going to go out in the city one night and they will be there for that.
Jordan
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Re: How would you feel if one of your BMs wasn't coming to your Bachelorette Party?
My Matron and one of my BM's will most likely miss the bach party and the rehearsal & dinner...since they're both OOT. I'm not upset about it - I know if they COULD be there, they would and that's what matters.
Maribelle7777
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Re: How would you feel if one of your BMs wasn't coming to your Bachelorette Party?
I think 2 of mine arent going to be at mine.
One BM cannot comebecause of $ (which I know is the truth but to be honest I am still a bit hurt by it, even though I pretended I wasn't).
The other one is pregnant, in the process of moving from one building at work to another, has relatives' birthdays all this month etc. That leaves my MOH and some other girls.
Yeah - not too happy about all this. What can I do force them to go? I don't want to be mad at them but I am a bit resentful. Especially since FH's bach. party - 25 guys are going. I don't even think I have 10 coming to mine.
With that said, you have a viable excuse. If you cannot make it to the BP, take her out another time, even if it's after her wedding. That way she knows you didn't mean to miss it because you dind't care but you really did have something else going on.
Edited - I was venting too much.
EvenEdan
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Re: How would you feel if one of your BMs wasn't coming to your Bachelorette Party?
Maribelle vent away! I don't blame you, I would be upset too.
Thanks everyone for your kind words and advice, I think I will plan a spa day or something special for the two of us. That makes me feel better.
violet
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Re: How would you feel if one of your BMs wasn't coming to your Bachelorette Party?
Hey, you have a good reason for it, what can you do?
For my one friend's B-party a couple weeks ago, none of her bridal party was there. Her father wanted her to put her 3 cousins as her bridal party. Well, one was away with her boyfriend and two couldn't come because they didn't want to leave their babies, like they never heard of babysitters, and that was including MOH. I wouldn't feel bad about your situation.
Scoop
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Re: How would you feel if one of your BMs wasn't coming to your Bachelorette Party?
You definitely have legitimate reasons for not being at these special events, so I wouldn't worry about it. Maybe you can take her out yourself one day...to dinner or somewhere fun.
