I am drawing a blank

KatieJ Posted: Dec 05, 2005 02:31 PM

I am drawing a blank

We're really trying to keep the guest list down...how important is it to invite single friends with a guest? Obviously everyone that has a significant other will be invited to bring them, but what about the single people? I hate the thought of trying to have a small wedding and having strangers there - is that rude??

mtdr1106 Posted: Dec 05, 2005 02:37 PM

Re: I am drawing a blank

Posted by KatieJ

We're really trying to keep the guest list down...how important is it to invite single friends with a guest? Obviously everyone that has a significant other will be invited to bring them, but what about the single people? I hate the thought of trying to have a small wedding and having strangers there - is that rude??

i've seen it done before. its not terrible - but it is against proper etiquette. i think it is your call to make.

iffer042373 Posted: Dec 05, 2005 02:37 PM

Re: I am drawing a blank

no not at all I have friends that are single they are not in any type of serious relationship so they will be invited alone

tracy2246 Posted: Dec 05, 2005 02:45 PM

Re: I am drawing a blank

I think it is up to you and what you want-but keep in mind a wedding usually is not a place you want to be alone unless it is a close friend.

October Bliss Posted: Dec 05, 2005 02:45 PM

Re: I am drawing a blank

The reality of getting married in years beginning with 20_ _ is that costs are skyrocketing, and the bride and groom often pay for the wedding themselves. While there was a time when all people invited to a wedding with a guest this is no longer the case (just run a search on google and you will see the question answered by almost every wedding site out there). Now most couples go by the rule of thumb that the 'guest' of the named invited guest must be either a fiance, a live-in lover, or other serious relationship partner, not some person that neither the bride or groom has ever met.

There will be no invites with 'and guest' printed on the inner envelope. If I know the name of the SO and I've met them, then their name will appear on the inner envelope. No one will be permitted to just bring a guest to my wedding. I can't afford it, and space is limited.

hmpena Posted: Dec 05, 2005 02:49 PM

Re: I am drawing a blank

We ended up inviting many single friends with guest to the wedding by word of mouth. I let many know after the invites went out that if they were dating someone they could bring them. None of our single friends wanted to bring dates. We lucked out.

STBH Posted: Dec 05, 2005 04:47 PM

Re: I am drawing a blank

i am not having my single friends invite dates only if they have a significant other that is special to them. We are paying for the wedding and all our friends are real cool about it

AlliNMatt06 Posted: Dec 05, 2005 05:17 PM

Re: I am drawing a blank

IMO I would always invite a single guest above the age of 18 with a guest. It is always nice to have someone there to dance with and not feel so lonely.

stephanielyse Posted: Dec 05, 2005 05:40 PM

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Goldi1021 Posted: Dec 05, 2005 05:52 PM

Re: I am drawing a blank

All of the etiquette books I have ever read state that it is not a requirement of a host/hostess to invite someone with a guest unless they are living with, engaged to or are in a significant relationship with someone. the ONLY time I would break this rule (for myself) is if the single person knows absolutely NOBODY else at the function.

beautyq115 Posted: Dec 05, 2005 05:53 PM

Re: I am drawing a blank

I have had it done to me and it really s u c k s!!

The first wedding there was no excuse I was in the BP..her parents were paying for the whole thing which was a HUGE wedding! I wasn't allowed to have a date because I wasn't dating anyone seriously.

The second wedding was my cousin's I was with my FI (boyfriend at the time) and they were paying for it themselves...I asked if I could bring my FI and they waited until their RSVP to see how many people they had and I they ended up letting my bring him..I totally understood this situation.

JCam695 Posted: Dec 05, 2005 07:18 PM

Re: I am drawing a blank

I am also struggling with this because I know how it feels to be an adult and get invited to a wedding without a guest, and it stinks.

But at the same time, I hate the idea of paying for people I've never met.

I think in the end we may invite people with guests but hope hope hope that they choose to come alone.

sk1nny27 Posted: Dec 05, 2005 07:20 PM

Re: I am drawing a blank

we are having a small wedding too. i did not invite any guestd of anyone. if people had mates who i have met i invited them by name on the invites. i do not think its rude at all. it is so hard to keep weddings small. you gotta do what you gotta do.

roxyspark Posted: Dec 05, 2005 07:36 PM

Re: I am drawing a blank

We are inviting most of the single people with a date.
It is annoying because it adds around 45 extra people, but FH and I decided to give our single friends the option to bring someone.

MrsD06 Posted: Dec 05, 2005 10:46 PM

Re: I am drawing a blank

We weren't going to invite people with guests unless they had a SO but then we felt weird b/c we ended up including all of our cousins with dates (b/c some have SOs, a few don't) but they are all the same age and would def. be hanging out as a group so it would possibly have been akward if a few didn't have dates..so then how could we not invite like 3 people without a date (non family) ya know? I know it's up to us but it just seemed to work better this way for us.