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I cannot believe what is happening to me (LONG)

HelpMePlease Posted:

I cannot believe what is happening to me (LONG)

leafgirl Posted:

Re: I cannot believe what is happening to me (LONG)

Oh I am sorry to hear that, at least he wants to get help. I know it may be close to the wedding, but just hang in there. Part of marriage is standing side by side. Did you not know that he was addicted? Was he in the past?

MikeandLisa Posted:

Re: I cannot believe what is happening to me (LONG)

it will be better once you get out of work and can speak to him in person. im sorry you are dealing with this....
diva7531 Posted:

Re: I cannot believe what is happening to me (LONG)

Get him into rehab NOW, he doesn't neccesarily have to do 28 days, but make sure he see's a counseler. Just because he made a mistake doesn't mean you shoudl rethink marrying him. Marriage is for better or worse and drugs, alcohol, death included. His health comes first, get him help, standby him. Men get stressed about weddings too and deal with it differently. I have heard of many grooms who needed a therapist, prescription drugs to get thru the wedding process because of the stresses involved. I pray that you an FH can make it thru this.
kahlua716 Posted:

Re: I cannot believe what is happening to me (LONG)

The positive thing is that he WANTS to get help....you never could've forced him to do it.(well, you could've but it wouldn't work if he didn't want it)

You have every right to be hurt and angry. . .and I don't know if it is possible, but if it were me, I would postpone the wedding until he is better. AND he certainly owes you an apology.

Definitely stick by him- maybe attend some alanon meetings...(I think thats what its called....the AA type meetings for family and friends of those who are substance abusers.)

I wish you all the best and hope everything works out....

Here's some and to get you through it!
SN2BMRSBURTE Posted:

Re: I cannot believe what is happening to me (LONG)


I hope everything works out.
soon2bmrsdunn Posted:

Re: I cannot believe what is happening to me (LONG)

Good luck sweetie

monelwookie Posted:

Re: I cannot believe what is happening to me (LONG)

B22 Posted:

Re: I cannot believe what is happening to me (LONG)

he wants to get help. That takes a LOT of strength..

You will both get through this.. The fact that he wants to better himself is what is truly important. If he was addicted and did nothing about it, then you should rethink the marriage.

My best to all of you <333
shopaholic07 Posted:

Re: I cannot believe what is happening to me (LONG)

I am so sorry you are going through this.......try to stay calm, maybe take a walk during lunch to try to clear your head a little.......but definitely talk to him face-to-face about this. At least he came clean with you and now the both of you can try to help him.....
nycerika318 Posted:

Re: I cannot believe what is happening to me (LONG)

MJDoc12 Posted:

Re: I cannot believe what is happening to me (LONG)

i'm sorry this is happening to you---but keep in mind that he is ASKING for the help now--and that is something that is a HUGE step......most addicts can't even get to that point.

if you want this to work and stay by him---get him into rehab NOW. if it means postponing the wedding--do it. you may not have another chance to get him in....and he needs to detox and get it out of his system and professional help. this is much more important than any wedding day---if this is the man you wish to spend the rest of your life with. he needs you now more than ever!

together you can get thru this!
HeatherRose Posted:

Re: I cannot believe what is happening to me (LONG)

I hope you make it through this. Its a hard thing, I once dated someone addicited to pain pills and alcohol, as long as he wants help, he's doing the right thing and that's the love of your life, so stick by his side, and you will get through this. Good luck!!
enjft Posted:

Re: I cannot believe what is happening to me (LONG)

SusiBtoM Posted:

Re: I cannot believe what is happening to me (LONG)

Addiction is a powerful thing, and I have to give kudos for your FH to coming clean to you about it.
It's a great thing that he can admit his addiction and to want to seek treatment for it.

Yes, you are going to be angry at him and feeling hurt for hiding this, but rethink your postion to one of support. He told you this because he needs your help.
It's going to be tough, which is why he needs your support. Is this really worth thinking about not marrying him ? Can you give up so easily on him ?

Good luck to the both of you.
LuckiestGirl Posted:

Re: I cannot believe what is happening to me (LONG)

I am so sorry that this is happening to you so close to your wedding. But at least he came out and told you which means he truely does want help and just by knowing that he reached out to you and knows he has a problem should make you feel better. I know he lied to you but it wasnt him lying it was the addiction taking over and now that he was able to tell you it means he realized that and he wants control of himself again. Get him the help and all will be fine. Show him love and that you care and be by his side as a cheerleader and you will see things will be great.

hunnybunnyxoxo Posted:

Re: I cannot believe what is happening to me (LONG)

i am so sorry this is happening!! i know the timing couldnt be worse!
i know you feel like he dropped a bomb on you - which he did, but the best thing you can do is be there for him.
You need to help him get through this!!
try to be strong. im so sorry!
i hope all is well!! and that your fh gets the help he needs
bellaro782 Posted:

Re: I cannot believe what is happening to me (LONG)

Awww im sooo SOrry that you are going threw this
This is a Hurddle you both have to deal with .. Dealing with an Addiction is hard & people hide it But when they are coming out asking for help you just have to try and Help as much as you can...

you know that saying threw good times & Bad well i think this is a bad moment and you have to just try & Help...

I wish you the strength and courage to be there to support him.. Its going to be hard but I wish you the best of Luck...
kitty1224 Posted:

Re: I cannot believe what is happening to me (LONG)

Send him to rehab, it will be the best thing for both of you. Good Luck
JMM7876 Posted:

Re: I cannot believe what is happening to me (LONG)

awww...I am so sorry!!

I understand you feel hurt and betrayed but he needs your help right now. If I were you I would ignore the negative comments...

Good Luck to both of you!!!

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