I do not know.......

Sometimes I just do not know.... You know I am a controlling person... I need to know what is going on.. If everything is going to be OK.. Me and my FH are paying for everything. I work a bullish job. 20hrs a week... He works as a construction worker in the city... He was laid off for 3 weeks just went back to work this week...
But for sometime now I have been trying to talk to him about me getting a second job. Just for the wedding.. just in case.. you neva know what is in store. He wont let me... He got it Don't worry. I complain to much etc...... All what he says.... I just rather be prepared... I just want 2 cry.. I am so done.... He makes me so mad...

If you want a second job then go for it!! He should 'let' you make your own choice. I know he probably wants to handle this himself to be the man of the household. But seriously, it will help you both save more. Another job will equal less stress. for both of you. You can take that extra money and use it for Payments on your vendors or even for gas and food. You can quit the job before your wedding. I would talk to him and explain why it is important to both of you for you to work a second job. Its better to be prepared and have that extra cash. god forbid he lost his job again. HTH

I work two jobs. My second (part time) job is something that doesn't pay much but I LOVE it. And it pays enough for say gas and food. At first FH was concerned that I'd be taking on too much, but now he sees that every dollar counts.

And let's just say THANK GOD I have it because FH got laid off in November and is still looking for a new job.

If you want u should def. get a job. You will feel better and he will appreciate in the long run.

Good Luck

I know how you feel. I am unemployed right now and my DH is not concerned, always tells me, don't worry, it will be fine, I'm not worried, I got this under countrol, we're ok. But he won't really SHOW me how ok we are, and I am like you - I like to be in control, like to see what's happening. I am thinking about getting a part time waitressing job but then I won't get unemployment, and it may not make sense if I can't make as much as unemployment is giving me. I feel you!

I work 2 jobs, a full time 9-5 and I waitress on some evenings and some weekends.
The restaurant I work at lets me do a per diem shift. I do not have a schedule when they need me they call me and if I can do it I will. It's a great way to not get burned out by the stress of 2 jobs, but it also gives me the opportunity to make some extra money for the wedding. mybe you could find a shift like that somewhere.
My FI is unemployed right now. I know he doesn't want me working extra and when he is back to work I can give up the second. Maybe remind him you are a 'team'... there may come a point where he will be pulling the weight ,and for you to step up now shows your really committed. I think that is a great thing. For right now you have to do what makes you happy and will help the BOTH of you. I say go for it!

Good Luck

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Posted by soontobecruz

Maybe remind him you are a 'team'... there may come a point where he will be pulling the weight ,and for you to step up now shows your really committed.

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I completely agree. Right now I'm pulling the weight at home but one day I may want to go back to school again for a doctorate, and then it's FH's turn to work two jobs if necessary.

Aww.. that's so frustrating. I'm sorry. Every situation is different, but I will pass on the one piece of advice my FMIL gave my FH. 'Don't pressure her to work if she doesn't want to; let her work if she wants to.' I always thought it was curious that she choose that as her 1 piece of advice, but maybe it made the world of difference to her.
If you feel the same way, then you should really talk to your FH. Just remember to be gentle and take his feelings into consideration too. You're his princess and he wants to take care of you. He may be afraid that you taking a second job means he's failing... Try reassuring him that he isn't and that you are in this together. I hope this helps.