I don't even care anymore...thanks FILs
So the most recent issue they had was food. They wanted upgrades, my dad didn't want to spend any more $$$, I told them that if they want more upgrades they can pay for them. Well...the sh_t hit the fan with that one. And I don't get it...if its SOOOO important to have cavier and what not, why wouldn't you just pay for it? Whatever.
It caused such turmole that my father decided that if the upgrades were around $500, he'd pay it (they're splitting the cost of everything) but if its like $5K, he will not. He says it will be worth it to keep his sanity and stress level down. So I tell FIL's to figure out which upgrades they want, figure out a cost, present it to me, and we'll go from there. I had a feeling they wouldn't do it because that involves doing some research/work and they've done NONE (though they had no problem complaining about all of the work I've done.) But whatever. Apparently, they weren't pleased with that answer either and went back to FH and complained. FH can't take this crap anymore (like I can!) So he says to me last night 'there will be no upgrades, but when you get to fox hollow to finalize the menu (we have a few cocktail hour choices to make), keep quiet. You have no say in what is selected.' (Yes, you read that correctly....and he's saying that to keep his parents off our backs.)
Now, my first reaction was like 'excuse me? this is MY wedding and I have no say in what food I want? That's B.S' But, after giving it a lot of thought, I decided it wasn't worth fighting over something like a pan asian station when I know I'm not going to be able to eat it anyway. Mind you, FFIL already said he wants to eliminate the one thing that I insisted on having (b/c its not messy) and I don't even care about that anymore. Isn't that pathetic? They've made me so miserable that I don't even care anymore....
And, I called my BM to tell them of the problems we'll probably have when we get there. She told me I could always come back and make changes on my own, that ppl do that all the time and nobody notices. But my FILs are so concerned with impressing people, I quote from FFIL: 'I can't embarrass myself or FMIL when there are people there who have thrown lavish affairs. I just want that extra flair.' So....knowing that, I can't make changes behind their back because they will notice and then there will be a fight on my wedding day!
It's not supposed to be like this. But after all, they ARE paying half - and I'm reminded of it all the time - so they feel it is just cause for them to do whatever they want.![]()
It caused such turmole that my father decided that if the upgrades were around $500, he'd pay it (they're splitting the cost of everything) but if its like $5K, he will not. He says it will be worth it to keep his sanity and stress level down. So I tell FIL's to figure out which upgrades they want, figure out a cost, present it to me, and we'll go from there. I had a feeling they wouldn't do it because that involves doing some research/work and they've done NONE (though they had no problem complaining about all of the work I've done.) But whatever. Apparently, they weren't pleased with that answer either and went back to FH and complained. FH can't take this crap anymore (like I can!) So he says to me last night 'there will be no upgrades, but when you get to fox hollow to finalize the menu (we have a few cocktail hour choices to make), keep quiet. You have no say in what is selected.' (Yes, you read that correctly....and he's saying that to keep his parents off our backs.)
Now, my first reaction was like 'excuse me? this is MY wedding and I have no say in what food I want? That's B.S' But, after giving it a lot of thought, I decided it wasn't worth fighting over something like a pan asian station when I know I'm not going to be able to eat it anyway. Mind you, FFIL already said he wants to eliminate the one thing that I insisted on having (b/c its not messy) and I don't even care about that anymore. Isn't that pathetic? They've made me so miserable that I don't even care anymore....
And, I called my BM to tell them of the problems we'll probably have when we get there. She told me I could always come back and make changes on my own, that ppl do that all the time and nobody notices. But my FILs are so concerned with impressing people, I quote from FFIL: 'I can't embarrass myself or FMIL when there are people there who have thrown lavish affairs. I just want that extra flair.' So....knowing that, I can't make changes behind their back because they will notice and then there will be a fight on my wedding day!
It's not supposed to be like this. But after all, they ARE paying half - and I'm reminded of it all the time - so they feel it is just cause for them to do whatever they want.
