I have a situation- LONG

Okay my mother wants my brother to come to our wedding- the problem is that my brother stopped talking to me3 years ago because of something real trivial-IMO- anyway my mom walks into my house and says' your not going to like this but I do' your brother said he is coming to the wedding- my brother and I have never been close and i can take him or leave him but I am limited to the # of guest that I can invite. I have not included him because there are so many others that I share my life with that I would pick over him- I just dont know how to tell my mother because it is gonna lead to a big arguement or my mother crying or something- she wants all her children at the wedding but I dont feel that she should be using my wedding as a reunion- I told her on many occasions that my brother needs to come out and mend fences with his siblings-(he isnt talking to any of us) BEFORE my wedding and he isnt invited unless he comes and we reconcile before hand. what do you guyss think?- by the way he hasnt even met my FH and when my mother asked my brother to talk to my FH on the phone- he hung up- so I just dont want no bad vibes for the wedding

I don't know the specific siuation...but my take is that if your brother already told your mom that he wants to come...he is making a first step...

its gotta be hard to come if all your siblings don't get a long with him...

why not make the first step and call him or email him...I know you may not want to...but know that you are the better person...

meet half way...

I agree with Erica but I also agree with the other girls that you should have afamily GTG before your wedding so the wedding is not the first time you are all together. You will have enough stress without this added

I just spoke to my mother and I told her that he is welcome to come to my wedding on the condition that we meet prior to my wedding- I told her that Im willing to meet him half way even though he stopped talking to me but its not gonna be at my wedding- and i was firm on that- my brother is that in name only- so she said that she feels that he should be there because its a family occasion- fine with me as long as we get together before march 21th 2004-im cool- thanks ladies

I think that sounds like a good plan...maybe you can have a sibling brunch?

good luck

Sounds like a good idea. Good for you for taking the high road!
If he is not speaking with any of his siblings, I would be concerned about his motive for wanting to come to your wedding. A gtg before hand may help ensure he is not just looking to cause drama.

Tough situation, good luck

I dont think that my brother had anything to do with it- its all my mothers doing- when my mom first came to me about this it was early on and i didnt want to deal with it- but i really think that she is coaxing him into coming- we will see- i told her to make the arrangements to meet up- my mother has always thought that if she kisses my brother butt that he would not be any less of a jerk- and my brother has a history of alcoholism and violence and because he and i dont talk its hard to tell whether thats in the past because i dont want the bad vibes- thats why i have excluded a few people from my reception- they dont know how to act when they drink-

I agree with everyone else on having something BEFORE hand..a wedding isnt the place for bad blood and bad vibes!!! It sounds as if he may be making the effort though./so hopefully he will mak ethe effort to meet up ahead of time!