I need to vent....Sorry if it's long....

Ok, so FH has the sweetest friend in the world, and has been dating this wretched thing for a while and they recently got engaged...This girl is awful in all senses of the word, she keeps him on such a leash, that he can no longer think for himself....Anyhoo, everything is a competition for her, she is a pahtological liar and tries to one up everyone, but is lying most of the way.....I am one that does not care how much money you have, and how much you don't have, she on the other hand, the FIRST time I met her asked me how much FH makes...is it any of your business, I think NOT.....She proceeds to ask inappropriate questions to me about money throughout this entire wedding planning thing, well the other day she called me to let me know she's engaged....She tells me for years now that she wants a solitaire engagement ring, all of the sudden she is explaining her ring to me, and it SOUNDS LIKE MINE!!!!!! She told her FH that she wanted my ring, he coulndn't find it of course, bc my ring was freaking hand made and custom made by the head designer of Cartier (my dad is in the diamond business we aren't millionaires)...so there is really nothing out there like it....anyway...fine, i get over that little thing and have yet to see this imitation . So the other day she is calling me and mentioning places that she's looked at and clearly inflating the prices ridiculously, WHY THE HELL WOULD YOU DO THAT...I DON'T CARE, IT'S NOT A COMPETITION.... Anyway, I bite my tounge, bc I know how much these places go for....and she is literally trippling the prices....THEN she proceeds to say how cheap my place is....I dont' think what my pp is cheap, and I know for a fact that one of her places is that she is leaning towards, is very much under 100 p/p which no one cares about, it's the way you do your wedding that counts not the price you pay!!!!! But she is making the price out to be 300 p/p and then tell me my place is cheap....I mean really...so I lose it on her, and give it to her, the date that she is looking at is a HIGHLY discounted date, bc not many ppl want that date (you can figure it out for yourself) and i told it to her, I also told her, acting all stupid, like, really, they are charging that much for you, I know someone that got married there and paid 1/3 of what they are charging...SHE HAD NOTHING TO SAY, SHE WAS CAUGHT IN A LIE....she really brings out the worst in me...A WEDDING IS NOT A COMPETITION, everyone does the BEST they can..and I always feel like this girl is competing to do better than me...FH despises her as well...but we can't do that to his friend....I just don't know what to do...We have to go out to dinner with them tomorrow night to celebrate the engagement, and I might lunge at her, seriously...she is soooo jealous, but don't TRY to put me down...I'm not trying to compete with me..maybe I should jsut keep my mouth full of food so I can't say anything to her......

Sorry for this being so long.....and really this isn't really me, she brings out the worst in ppl

So sorry! She sounds like a total nightmare. I get so angry that I get so angry with certain people. I swear it's some sort of sick gift these people have for just getting under your skin. I hate that somehow, even if we don't like or care about the other person, they can still get us so angry! I was getting angry for you just reading your post!

I'm so sorry you have to deal with her at all. Just keep reminding yourself how screwed up she truly must be.

She's jealous. - Period.
Just call her on all of her bullSh*t very sweetly. 'oh my GOD ? 'recepion hall' is charging $300 pp now ? When FH and I were there 3 months ago it was a 1/4 of the price !!'
'you gown was HOW much ? Are you sure ? I triend on the same one for 1/2 the price'
blah blah.
It's aggravating and frustrating to deal with. Believe me, I have a cousin who flat out asks the price of EVERYTHING. and she's one of those 'well when I GOT MARRIED......' ugh !!
Good Luck w/ your dinner !
Have a bottle of wine !!

This person sounds like she has many personal issues. Maybe get her a gift certificate for a few therapy sessions as an engagement gift...haha kidding. There are people like that all over the place. I am sure we all know someone like that. Dinner will be tough. But you will get through it. Here is a hug

Kim

She would get to ANYONE. -
There's no way you could ignore her or not let her aggravate you !!

And as for her announcing (and inflating) price tags. - That is a sign of someone who:
A - Has NO clue
B - Doesn't HAVE the money to be spending the way she WISHES she could.......

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Posted by Marisa M

She would get to ANYONE. -
There's no way you could ignore her or not let her aggravate you !!

And as for her announcing (and inflating) price tags. - That is a sign of someone who:
A - Has NO clue
B - Doesn't HAVE the money to be spending the way she WISHES she could.......

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B is exactly true!!!!! She makes her poor FH get her all these expensive gifts when he's not making a million dollars...on the other hand, she hates the fact that FH and I both have very nice jobs (knock on wood) and I don't MAKE FH get me anything expensive or take me to expensive restaurants, when we can afford them, once in a while it's nice, this girl wants it day and night, bc she knows she can't have it..her poor FH doesn't have a penny to his name

I know you are mad about this but that just sounds so funny her yelling at the top of her lungs 'You spent $1000 on me.' I would laugh right in her face. I know you have no choice because it is FH's friend. But you are a good FW by going to dinner and supporting FH. Don't worry take deep breaths and think happy thoughts. Oh and add a few martinis to that...haha.

Kim

totally agree about having a few martinis...!

i'd kill HER with kindness! sooth your inner fury with being overly kind to her BS ways. she's looking for that satisfaction that YOU'RE jealous of her-her inner envious self would just LOVE to see your rage and emotion. so i would simply just go with it! whatever to her! smile and say how wonderful it all sounds! she'll die trying to upset you, but don't let her do it. you've got the right attitude about material things, let her sweat trying to make you jealous.

The saddest part is, I really really genuinely like FH's friend, they have been together for somethinglike 7 years, so I think he just got comfortable with her, and was scared to leave, but he deserves sooo much better, FH and all his friends think this as well....The martinis might not be such a good idea, I have a mouth on me, and am not afraid to use it, and it tends to be louder when I have a few drinks in me

she sounds like a real ding dong!

I wouldn't let her get to you, just throw things back in her face about her stupid comments....


but seriously what a dingdong

Ugh!!!! She sounds like my FSIL!!!

If she gets to you that much, you may want to get 'sick' before dinner. FSIL is like that and FI told her off a few weeks ago. I'm not one for the killing with kindness so she is no longer invited to the wedding.

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Posted by bluesashbride

totally agree about having a few martinis...!

i'd kill HER with kindness! sooth your inner fury with being overly kind to her BS ways. she's looking for that satisfaction that YOU'RE jealous of her-her inner envious self would just LOVE to see your rage and emotion. so i would simply just go with it! whatever to her! smile and say how wonderful it all sounds! she'll die trying to upset you, but don't let her do it. you've got the right attitude about material things, let her sweat trying to make you jealous.

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I like that idea! She sounds like someone who is jellous of EVERYONE, and tries to compensate. Give her no reason to be jellous of you, just shower her w/ complements and she'll go away.
Personally, I hate when people are jellous of me, I always think they'll put an 'evil eye' on me or something... So.. I try to 'minimize' everything I am doing.. so that they'll get bored and be jellous of someone else. If you have nothing to prove, and it sounds like you really don't, just indulge her... and tell her how everything is SO much more expensive than you.. and she is so lucky !

The best antidote is to say nothing as hard as that may be. SHe is getting a reaction from you and that keeps her going. After a while she will stop if you stop reacting. Let it go over you and tune her out.

She is insecure and that's why she treats her FI that way also. She will eventually crash and burn. It's only a matter of time.

The only wise a$$ thing I may say is 'you're paying how much? I think you are seriously getting ripped off and you have sucker written all over your face!'

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OMG Good Luck I would be dreading the dinner.