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Wedding Forums > Brides Helping Brides ™ > I think I am probably being a little sensitive...
I think I am probably being a little sensitive...
JojoBride
Posted: Nov 10, 2012 09:45 PM+

Posted: Nov 10, 2012 09:45 PM
I think I am probably being a little sensitive...
Please be honest with me all...I've been an emotional rollercoaster lately and this is just bothering me...My mom today mentioned it is tradition that the Bride and Groom give each other a gift on their wedding day...
I started thinking about it and realized my cousin who got married this past July received flowers and other surprises on their first night as husband and wife...my other cousin who was married 3 years ago ALSO got a nice necklace and flowers the day of her wedding from her husband...
SO I started thinking about what I could get my FH...couldn't come up with anything so I decided to ask my fiance when he got home today what kind of gift he may like (besides intimate apparel winkwink)...
He looked at me with this blank expression and said 'I'm supposed to get you something?'
As I'm typing this it seems kinda stupid because he legitimately probably didn't realize he was supposed to get me a gift but I was a little upset at the fact that he wasn't even thinking about surprising me with anything? He is not a very good actor, I could tell he wasn't planning on getting me a thing on our wedding day.
Again, please be honest with me...am I being overly sensitive?
fdnybride163
Posted: Nov 10, 2012 09:57 PM+

Posted: Nov 10, 2012 09:57 PM
Re: I think I am probably being a little sensitive...
I'm in the same situation. My fh is so clueless to traditions like that it wouldn't even cross his mind.We did talk about it and he said the same exact thing. So we both agreed to do something very small. He needs to send me something sweet and I will send them a 'cake' made of stacked beer and a pint of strawberry cheesecake Ben and Jerry's (it's his fav).
We have spent so much money on this wedding that we both agreed not to spend more $$
Don't take it personal, boys are slow :)
Kristin31613
Posted: Nov 10, 2012 11:44 PM+

Posted: Nov 10, 2012 11:44 PM
I think I am probably being a little sensitive...
I don't think it's a big deal, but that's just me. With all the money being spent on wedding and honeymoon, I don't need anything else.
katnwill
Posted: Nov 11, 2012 12:20 AM+

Posted: Nov 11, 2012 12:20 AM
I think I am probably being a little sensitive...
I agree don't take it personal. I told my FH last week about that tradition; he too knows nothing about wedding traditions. He seemed a little upset (lol); by the look on his face I could tell he was thinking about having to spend money on something else wedding related. I told him he didn't have to be anything big; it could be something sentimental. I already know what I'm getting him - music note cuff links from an etsy vendor. He is a dj and music is his life. I'm not expecting anything big.
mattandjess2013
Posted: Nov 11, 2012 12:34 AM+

Posted: Nov 11, 2012 12:34 AM
I think I am probably being a little sensitive...
Most men don't know this at all. FH didn't have a clue when I spoke to him about it.
jamester116
Posted: Nov 11, 2012 07:14 AM+

Posted: Nov 11, 2012 07:14 AM
I think I am probably being a little sensitive...
FH doesn't know a lot of the 'norms' for wedding etiquette. Yesterday was my bridal shower. I told FH when you pick me up you should bring me flowers. Everyone thought he was so sweet, but really he was just doing what i told him to do. haha
JojoBride
Posted: Nov 11, 2012 09:49 AM+

Posted: Nov 11, 2012 09:49 AM
I think I am probably being a little sensitive...
Ok so I was being sensitive...I'm surprised all these guys had no clue about this wedding detail...could it be something the mother-of-the-bride made up? LOL
Shanti12
Posted: Nov 11, 2012 10:57 AM+

Posted: Nov 11, 2012 10:57 AM
Re: I think I am probably being a little sensitive...
Yeah mine didn't know this at all! He'll probably forget or something too haha... For some reason it isn't bothering me. He's being really helpful and excited about the wedding and it's super sweet. I think I'm only going to give him a card and the boudoir pics (which he may suspect he's getting but I've been not saying anything about that).Neither of us also wants to spent a ton more money than we already are so I'm not stressing about it.
scottsbride
Posted: Nov 11, 2012 01:51 PM+

Posted: Nov 11, 2012 01:51 PM
I think I am probably being a little sensitive...
My FH had no idea about it either till my BM and friend said something to him and he was like ummmmm deer in headlights and she just shook her head and said Ill take you lol It doesnt bother me personally because most guys dont know about this stuff and I would honestly have been surprised if he knew. We are jut going to give each other a card because we are spending all this money on the wedding.
BrideToB
Posted: Nov 11, 2012 04:31 PM+

Posted: Nov 11, 2012 04:31 PM
I think I am probably being a little sensitive...
I'm sorry, but yes I think you're being a little sensitive. But that's OK planning a wedding is stressful!! Some men aren't very detail oriented so they don't think about these little details. Unless they're very into the wedding, they probably aren't aware of many of these traditions. I have to drop hints to my FH all the time. :)
prettylillizzy
Posted: Nov 11, 2012 05:07 PM+

Posted: Nov 11, 2012 05:07 PM
Re: I think I am probably being a little sensitive...
I wouldn't give it a second thought. In fact, it's a good thing you said something because you would've given him a gift and he, not knowing, would have given you a big ol' goose egg on your wedding day.Guys don't keep track of these types of things, so it doesn't surprise me he didn't know. I'm still explaining the concept of a bridal shower to FH.
DB2013
Posted: Nov 11, 2012 06:10 PM+

Posted: Nov 11, 2012 06:10 PM
I think I am probably being a little sensitive...
FH has no idea what should be done!
2013Bride
Posted: Nov 11, 2012 07:44 PM+

Posted: Nov 11, 2012 07:44 PM
I think I am probably being a little sensitive...
I had no idea about it myself, until I signed up for LIW.... I wouldn't take it personally!
Bride2013
Posted: Nov 11, 2012 10:57 PM+

Posted: Nov 11, 2012 10:57 PM
Re: I think I am probably being a little sensitive...
My FH said the same exact thing!! lol Clueless!! He's even watched wedding videos with me in where the bride reads off the card attached to the gift the groom gives her the day of.Apparently he missed that part! lol I was sensitive at first because i thought he was being unthoughtful but the truth is men don't know much and most times they have to be reminded what to do!!
Sugaplum111905
Posted: Nov 11, 2012 11:47 PM+

Posted: Nov 11, 2012 11:47 PM
Re: I think I am probably being a little sensitive...
Posted by fdnybride163
Don't take it personal, boys are slow :)
This! I totally agree. Even though we know so many people close to us get married the past few years, FH doesn't know anything about planning a wedding.
Karin
Posted: Nov 12, 2012 06:45 AM+

Posted: Nov 12, 2012 06:45 AM
I think I am probably being a little sensitive...
My FH is very good with gifts and surprises which makes me feel so lucky be with him but I don't think he knows that we exchange gifts on the wedding day! Guys just don't think things thru.Welcome New Vendors
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