if you remember, My BP dilemma (sp) (need advice)

JZNCK Posted: May 24, 2004 12:49 PM

if you remember, My BP dilemma (sp) (need advice)

ETA: I changed the title, it sounded rude

Here is the story: my fiance didn't want to do groomsman, just a best man, so I didn't want to do bm's but I already asked them, so I felt bad 'un-asking' them, but Now I don't at all

My MOH called me today (my birthday) but nobody else did.. and I concidered them good friends, i always call them on their birthdays.. So now I feel that it would be easier to tell them we're not having bridal parties.. just moh and bm. also, we never talk anymore.. I haven't talked to 2 of them in months, and when we do talk it's through e-mail.. i just feel like we've grown apart.. I would much rather honor my BEST FRIEND as my one and only bridal party attenden.. What do you ladies think? am I being retarded??

I would just tell them that FI didn't want to have GM so I don't want to have girls, I just want them to be at the wedding though.. maybe they can pass out programs, or do a reading or something.

Monkeybride Posted: May 24, 2004 12:52 PM

Re: if you remember, I wanted to do away with my bridal party (long need advice)

As long as they haven't made any purchases I think it's fine.
Just explain the situation with FH just wanting a best man and that you didn't know that at the time you asked them.
If you still want them in your wedding then your ideas are good but they don't sound like great friends anyway.
It's hard getting older and realizing that friendships grow apart. I have gone through the same thing.

CaCRmr Posted: May 24, 2004 12:54 PM

Re: if you remember, I wanted to do away with my bridal party (long need advice)

Yea, I agree, if they didn't buy anything then it's ok. I only have a MOH and a BM it's not a horrible thing! Good luck telling them the news.

JZNCK Posted: May 24, 2004 12:55 PM

Re: if you remember, I wanted to do away with my bridal party (long need advice)

It's true!! We have grown apart!!! It's like we have memories now and that's all, we have nothing in common, they haven't tried to contact me here in Georgia.. I get junk e-mail from them and that's it.. It's really up setting but I'm glad I found out before we did all of the dress shopping and stuff

THANK YOU

holly231 Posted: May 24, 2004 01:00 PM

Re: if you remember, I wanted to do away with my bridal party (long need advice)

Crystal,

I think your thoughts are 100% fine. If you have changed to only want a MOH and a BM, than that is your decision. With your wedding being so far off, and dresses not ordered, I think this is 1000% acceptable! Its your day...do as you please...don't look back on hard feelings....do what makes you happy!

AND....HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!

smitten Posted: May 24, 2004 01:05 PM

Re: if you remember, My BP dilemma (sp) (need advice)

I don't think you're being rude...if you feel you've grown apart and they haven't purchased anyting for your wedding yet...who knows maybe they will be relieved too.

Happy Birthday!

JZNCK Posted: May 24, 2004 02:05 PM

Re: if you remember, My BP dilemma (sp) (need advice)

Thank you so much girls!!!!!!!!!

FeliciaDA Posted: May 24, 2004 02:10 PM

Re: if you remember, My BP dilemma (sp) (need advice)

you aren't being rude at all. I entirely understand what you are going thru. Its certainly not too close to your wedding to tell them your decision, and I'm sure they will understand. The entire purpose of a wedding party is to include the people you truly care about .. not just have a big wedding party for 'pictures sake'! I cannot tell you how many people's wedding albums I look through, and the bride and groom tell me they don't even talk to their wedding party any longer!!

After starting out with a wedding party of 5 initially, but after too much 'agita' I am now only having two girls .. my MOH and one BM (who are family and future-family). FH is having 3, but only because they are his brothers and my brother. THESE are the people who really matter to us, and I will not regret having in the BP in the long run

Good Luck! And HAPPY BIRTHDAY

JimmysBride Posted: May 24, 2004 02:13 PM

Re: if you remember, My BP dilemma (sp) (need advice)

I don't think you are being rude and it's perfectly understandable for you to shrink your BP. It's funny how people just *drop* out of your life when you get engaged, isn't it? Well, at least it happened to me. Good luck and DO IT already so you don't have to keep stressing yourself about it!! (I'm the same way...I sit on it and stew for days before I get around to it and sometimes I need that push)

JZNCK Posted: May 24, 2004 02:19 PM

Re: if you remember, My BP dilemma (sp) (need advice)

I don't think you are being rude and it's perfectly understandable for you to shrink your BP. It's funny how people just *drop* out of your life when you get engaged, isn't it? Well, at least it happened to me. Good luck and DO IT already so you don't have to keep stressing yourself about it!! (I'm the same way...I sit on it and stew for days before I get around to it and sometimes I need that push)

THANK YOU

Maybe I'll just send them an e-mail concidering it's the only means of communication they seem to use

jennelishal Posted: May 24, 2004 04:19 PM

Re: if you remember, My BP dilemma (sp) (need advice)

Posted by Monkeybride

As long as they haven't made any purchases I think it's fine.
Just explain the situation with FH just wanting a best man and that you didn't know that at the time you asked them.
If you still want them in your wedding then your ideas are good but they don't sound like great friends anyway.
It's hard getting older and realizing that friendships grow apart. I have gone through the same thing.

I agree!!