Im not very happy w/ my church right now (vent)

OK the priest we originally met with almost 2 years ago, told us he was retiring about a year before our wedding but that he 'might' be around to perform our ceremony.

After pre cana we thought that another priest that worked with us would be great to marry us. So 2 months ago we go to the rectory and ask the secretary, she took our info and said the father would call us back.... nothing!

OK yeaterday i called the music director because i will be having a guest singer perform at the ceremony and to see what type of songs she could or could not sing. Wedding is in Just about a month so she would like to practice. He says it depends on the priest. SO I call the rectory and explain, she said they never switched the priest to the one we requested, and she would talk to him to see if he could do it.

I just get a call and the secretary tells me, he said he couldnt do it because he is too busy at this time, because another priest is leaving the parish and everything is just too confusing. SO basically they have no idea who will be marrying us, but as she said 'dont worry someone will be there that day!' YA THINK!

Im just annoyed because i want to know who will definitely be marrying us so i can pick my music out. I dont know about other parishes but we have to make a mandatory 'Donation' of $500 to get married there as well another $180 for the church musicians, they're not really doing us a favor. Give me a break i dont care who the heck marries us I just want to know who for definite

They said to call 2 weeks before my wedding, i would think all these details should be settled way before 2 weeks before the wedding dont you!

Please help if you have any advice im not very happy with my church right now and if the invites didnt already go out i seriously think i would get married at FH church and not mine

Thank you for listening ladies...as always
Vanessa

Awww! I can see how you feel.

At my FH's cousin's wedding they didn't know who would be marrying them until the night of the rehearsal. Turns out it was someone with a very thick accent. During the ceremony, a few times they ended up just standing there because they didn't understand what the priest said. Including the time when he said you may now kiss the bride.

Why not check out the options at your FH's church. Then you can make a list of the pros and cons to help you make your final decision.

Good luck!

Here is a brief nightmare that I encountered 30 years ago at my wedding.

We had a meeting 1 year before the wedding, set of the date, etc. A week or so before our wedding, we call the church to set up the rehearsal time and day. We all get to the church, only to find out that there was graduation going on and we had to wait. So we waited 2 hours.

The wedding day:
Guests and family arrives for our 3pm ceremony. I get to the church at 3, an on time bride.

We all get out of the limos, get lined up in the back of the church. We were instructed the night before that when we hear the wedding march, the first couple is to start and so on and so forth. The wedding march begins to play. The first couple goes, the next, etc, then comes my dad and I. We get up to the alter, he lifts my veil, kisses me, shakes my (then) fh's hand, and up the steps to the alter.

We get all settled and I whisper in my fh's ear 'wheres the priest'? He whispers back to me 'I'll tell you later' Yep, you got it, he was not there. We stood on the alter for 15 minutes before he came out. He was outside playing basket ball and forgot all about the wedding.

After our honeymoon, I went back to the church still flipping out with not only to the fact of the priest not being there, we didn't have the white runner which we paid for, we had no orgainist, (the limo driver played), no alter boys AND we didn't recite our chosen vows that we wrote ourselves.

The moral of this church story: Check EVERYTHING and make sure the everyone at the church is on the same page.

You have to go there in person, that is what I have learned. Nothing gets done otherwise. I waited weeks to get a call back from the church. Finally I went down there and settled everything in person because they will usually get a priest to talk to you, especially if you explain the situation. My church was $500 also, which I thought was ridiculous and my priest had business cards. I thought that was weird. If you go to your FH's church you have the chance of the date being taken already as well as the time.