Im so aaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhh

imyurfavgirl Posted: Nov 29, 2005 03:22 PM

Im so aaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhh

My 'MOH' who does absolutely does nothing has the nerve to tell me 'If you dont want me to be your moh Im with that'. How do i respond to that?

jellybean1420 Posted: Nov 29, 2005 03:24 PM

Re: Im so aaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhh

What is it with these MOH's backing out lately....you are like the 5th person who has been I have read about the past couple of days.

I would tell her that you would love her to be a part of your wedding, obviously that is why you asked her in the first place. See what she says. Did you two have an argument or something?

ChrissynRicky Posted: Nov 29, 2005 03:37 PM

Re: Im so aaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhh

Posted by imyurfavgirl

My 'MOH' who does absolutely does nothing has the nerve to tell me 'If you dont want me to be your moh Im with that'. How do i respond to that?

How did it come to that? Were you discussing her 'duties' (or lack there of?)

imyurfavgirl Posted: Nov 29, 2005 03:41 PM

Re: Im so aaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhh

yes and she came off with a attitude for no reason. If anyone should have one it should be me.

Laura&Phil Posted: Nov 29, 2005 03:46 PM

Re: Im so aaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhh

Wow, it would have been nice if she just didn't accept in the first place. Some people don't want to do the work. Did something happen?

I'd ask her to step down, nothing is worse than a BM who doesn't want to be there- esp if she's the MOH.

Talk to her before hand to see if it's financial or if she's going through something. Either way, sorry to hear it!

idovig Posted: Nov 29, 2005 03:50 PM

Re: Im so aaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhh

what kind of attitude is that

imyurfavgirl Posted: Nov 29, 2005 03:56 PM

Re: Im so aaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhh

I have no idea. I picked her because she was there since the beginning. When me and my fh became a couple and througout it all, she was even there even when he proposed to me. Now with the stress of this wedding, school and looking for a house, the person who is like a sister to me is going to treat me like this. Im so mad and disappointed i dont know what to do.

ChrissynRicky Posted: Nov 29, 2005 04:00 PM

Re: Im so aaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhh

Posted by imyurfavgirl

I have no idea. I picked her because she was there since the beginning. When me and my fh became a couple and througout it all, she was even there even when he proposed to me. Now with the stress of this wedding, school and looking for a house, the person who is like a sister to me is going to treat me like this. Im so mad and disappointed i dont know what to do.

What were the two of you talking about when she said that? Did she just come out of nowhere?

imyurfavgirl Posted: Nov 29, 2005 04:04 PM

Re: Im so aaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhh

We were talking about my veil. She wanted to see pics of it and i told her that they didnt come out good and after that this all started.

smurray Posted: Nov 29, 2005 04:43 PM

Re: Im so aaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhh

Posted by jellybean1420

What is it with these MOH's backing out lately....you are like the 5th person who has been I have read about the past couple of days.

I agree. Personally this is why I have a very small party. My MOH's are my sister(only), and my bestfriend since 3rd grade (and we are now 25) My BM's are FH's sister, and my close friend in which we lived across the street from each other for over 10yrs.

I just feel like if your not someone that I keep in contact w/, or that I don't speak to at least once everytwo weeks, I have no need for you in my wedding. If we can't keep in contact on a regular basis, how can I expect to keep up w/ you, or you to keep up w/ me when it comes to my planning.

It's a very big responsibility to take on when consenting to being in a wedding especially being a MOH. I'm sorry for your situation but if it doesn't work out, make sure you, and the next MOH have a real good understanding as far as what you need from her. Money isn't everything for that matter, but at least you need their support.

Good Luck

Goldi1021 Posted: Nov 29, 2005 04:46 PM

Re: Im so aaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhh

Posted by jellybean1420

What is it with these MOH's backing out lately....you are like the 5th person who has been I have read about the past couple of days.

I think people get caught up in a moment and then when they realize they actually have to DO something they realize they aren't prepared.

natiepie1028 Posted: Nov 29, 2005 04:49 PM

Re: Im so aaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhh

I hear you on that one. My MOH does absolutely nothing and to be honest i reget asking her. I also feel like it is ruining our once close relationship. She could care less about anything when it comes to my wedding.

Laura&Phil Posted: Nov 29, 2005 05:15 PM

Re: Im so aaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhh

Posted by imyurfavgirl

We were talking about my veil. She wanted to see pics of it and i told her that they didnt come out good and after that this all started.

Sounds like something is going on with her personally. Esp if she's been a good friend before this.

I know why one of my MOH was acting weird-I confronted her before her wedding about what she was doing wrong, etc and she was still a little mad-it's better now tho- almost normal. I didn't let my temporary issues with the way she was treating her in-laws change the way I apporoached her day and I'm glad I did it that way!

Maybe she's jealous? Going through a tough time? I know that our MOH and BM don't care as much about our weddings as we do but they should care a little!

One last thing, and I've had to watch myself with this one- make sure that you aren't always talking wedding stuff...even if they ask- sometimes I'll give details and sometimes I'll give a short answer and say something like 'don't want to think about the wedding right now'....I was going on and on with it all and that turns people off!! Even MOH!

MrsStefan Posted: Nov 29, 2005 05:39 PM

Re: Im so aaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhh

I had a BM do something similar. I called her out on it. To me, it was her way of asking for a way out. So I addressed the issue with her and it turned out that she didnt want to be in the wedding. I'd talk to her about it and let her know that your wedding is very important to you and that you only want people in the wedding who WANT to be there to share in your day with you.

MrsH1156 Posted: Nov 29, 2005 05:40 PM

Re: Im so aaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhh

Posted by Goldi1021

Posted by jellybean1420

What is it with these MOH's backing out lately....you are like the 5th person who has been I have read about the past couple of days.

I think people get caught up in a moment and then when they realize they actually have to DO something they realize they aren't prepared.

My thoughts exactly.

jellybean1420 Posted: Nov 29, 2005 11:57 PM

Re: Im so aaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhh

Well, what are they really supposed to do anyway???? Of course they need to take an interest and not leave you stranded like your MOH did.

My MOH is my cousin. She is 22 and still in college. She really hasn't helped me make any choices, I usually tell her what I decided after, the same as with my BM's. She e-mails me once in awhile and I see her on holidays to find out what's going on, but that's it. I guess I never had high expectations or really expected her to do much knowing she and all my BM's were still in school. My mom is planning my bridal shower b/c she knows that neither my MOH or BM's have the $$$ being they are all in school. I even offered to help my MOH and BM's plan my bachelorette party b/c they are busy.

I don't know....I guess it depends what your expectations of a MOH is. I would definetely be pissed though if she changed her mind and said she didn't want to be in my bridal party.