I'm sorry but I need to vent

a few months ago I was asked to be in a bridal party. The girl who asked me and I aren't close but I've known her FI for most of my life-I was genuinly excited to be asked, even though I was a bit surprised. We had never really hung out before then without our FI's, but I figured it would give us a good reason to get closer.

So now fast forward to now--this girl will call me repeatedly leave me vm's saying we should get together and when I call her back she NEVER picks up her phone...NEVER....she will then call me back a few days later with some lame excuse--i.e. she got sick, she fell asleep, she left her phone somewhere, her phone was on silent etc. This is each and everytime. I know that we are all busy and sometimes I ignore my friends phone calls too, but not each time-if she has a problem with me then why does she call me??? and if she doesn't have a problem then why isn't she honest with me????

Then the other day we had plans-actual plans to get together---I called her 5 TIMES I have yet to hear back from her!!!! It makes me so angry b/c she always complains about not having close friends yet here I am, making an attempt and she is completly blowing me off!!
Now I really don't want to be in this wedding-I'm poor as it is and I feel like I was only asked to make her BP look larger (or more even). I know that I can't back out now, and I would love to discuss this with her, but I don't want to make that big of a deal out of it, b/c I know that I will not be seeing this girl after her wedding--but you'd think she'd make somewhat of an attempt since I'm spending all this $$$$!

Sorry I needed to vent-thanks for listening

Honestly, I would just leave her a voicemail and politely say that you don't feel you have a relationship with her & being that the bridal party represents the bride, you don't feel comfortable fulfilling such an important role for her (or better yet, you don't feel worthy of this honor).
Then when she calls you to discuss, just don't answer the phone. I know it sounds very immature, but it's very rude on her part to be treating you like this. It's not like you'll be losing a great friend over this, JMO.

Sorry to hear about that. Although, you must understand for the future brides perspective too. Sometimes things in life come up and people get busy, afterall she is planning the most important day of her life. She obviously wants you in her bridal party for some reason...the bride has more expenses the more bridesmaids she has, so I don't think anyone in her right mind would ask someone to be part of her special day just to make the bridal party 'look bigger' when they have a problem with or dislike the person.

Not to say that your feelings are invalid, but maybe you are over reacting a bit. Are you absolutely sure she is screening for YOUR phone call? I know personally, I don't always have my phone w/ me and I use my cell as a primary #...sometimes I don't even hear it ring! I would say that you should sit and talk w/ her. If you don't want to be in her bridal party, you should just tell her. I just know as a bride to be, a student, and w/ everything else that's going on it's hard to keep my own head on straight. I think you should give her on opportunity to at least explain herself.

The reason I am writing so extensively on this is because I have an issue like this w/ a friend of mine...and she is always assuming if I don't pick up my phone everytime she calls that I am mad at her or something.

One thing that I will say, if you are not financially able to participate in a wedding, than you should tell the bride...the sooner, the better. There is nothing worse than finding out last minute...like I said, the bride does incure expenses for her bridesmaids. But I would at least talk to her and tell her how you feel.