I'm stressed need to vent

ok heres the story I got engaged back in March I was very surprised and excited since I wouldve started hinting in June when we were together 2 yr's. anyway 2 days later my fiance get's laid off from work
we werent going to be able to set the date right away due to financial situation's pretty much till he found a job So 1 month goes by 2 month's go by and now I'm getting because everyone is asking me did I set the date and I have to keep saying no.So finally un-employment put's him through training for him to get hi CDL license to drive 18 wheeler trucks and he's guranteed a job right after the class is over
so we set the date for Nov 5 th 2005 and I'm all excited
But then I find out in order for him to make good money he will have to out on the road for at least 1 yr to get experience before anyone will hire him local which means he will be gone at least 2 wk's for training and then when he starts working he will be gone 5-10days at a time with 1-2 days with home time
I'm so scared that we will grow apart for being seperated for days and the other thing is that I just started a new job and my hours are 9-530pm m-f hopefully he will get home on the weekends.
Has anyone else gone through this an anyone help me deal with this?

I have not been thru this so all i have to offer is a

Well, JT and I got engaged a year and a half ago, and when we lived in Boston. He was there to finish his degree and I went to be with him. I had a really great job there that paid REALLY well, but I was miserable without my family, so I moved home last July, while he stayed to finish his degree. For Almost 7 months we were separated. I only got to see him twice a month, and most of the time he was at work while I sat in our apartment. It was so hard and, as you can see by the amount of posts I have, I had a lot of alone time, but it honestly made our relationship stronger and the time we spent together more special. If this is what your FH needs to do to secure your future together, and he is willing to do it for the sake of the two of you, then you have to just know it will be ok in the end. Have faith in your relationship and the fact that it's only a year. I know it's tough, but hell, he is the one who will have to be away so much, he must be miserable over that, too. Remember, a year of inconvenience for an indefinite future with more stability. Good luck!

My FH travels a great deal for his job- not as much as yours will but at least two weeks every month. It actually makes it more exciting when we are together, I don't take him for granted ever and I look forward to the time alone to spend with friends and do girl stuff.

My brother and his wife were seperated for more than six months when they were planning their wedding and they are happily married for five years now! You just have to make the most of the time when you are together. Think of all those military wives, like my SIL who manage to make it work!

I hope that helps-share your fears with your FH and I'm sure he will reassure you!

Good luck and FM me if you need to talk!

I know how you feel! I got engaged on 01/08/03. It was a complete surprise. Three days later he got into a really bad car accident. He wasn't really hurt bad but he is a truck driver & they couldn't figure out why he blacked out. He was in and out of the hospital for over a year. So he lost his job, his license revoked so it was really hard to find a new job because he had no transportation. I know had to pay two people's bills on one salary. We went through a lot. He worked many $8.00/hour jobs in delis & pizza parlors. There were hard times but now our relationship is a lot stronger.

I just finally set my wedding date, over 1 year after I got engaged because I didn't want to set it if he wasn't working. Take your time & set it when you feel comfortable. When people ask because they always do & it becomes so frustrating say you both want a long engagement & are trying save money.

I still haven't really planned anything because we are not in a good money situation but slowly everything improving & it will for you Too!

thanks it helps to know people understand

Honestly, tough times are neccesary and good and destined to hit. FI and I have struggled through some serious external difficulties that had nothing to do with 'us' just what life was throwing at us. Our love is stronger for it.

It will be a difficult time, but it will bring you closer together if you choose to work through it and not let the challenges outweigh your love and commitment to one another.

Challenges are inevitable, and IMO will get even more frequent with marriage, parenthood, etc. FI and I always say 'Bring it on! We can handle anything at this point!' Learn from it, and think of all the crazy stories you will have for your kids!

i have been dating Fh husband for 4 and half years and only have lied in the same city let alone the same state for about 6 months of the time. He is military -and i am a bit head strong and had to get my career going and finish school. We learned to talk on the phone lots - you learn a lot about each other when you talk - With all the competition for phone companies you could find a good phone plan for both of you that you can talk when you want to after work - it is hard and a bit of a roller coaster ride- but that was when i saw him one weekend a month - now we see each other almost every weekend- it works out well - it allows you to become more independent - good advice - start a new activity beside wedding planning one day a week - it will make it easier

Good luck