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Improper e-gift???

tracyg Posted:

Improper e-gift???

Am i being oversensitive?? FH is Jewish, i am Protestant. His aunt and uncle sent us a menorah for an e-gift. I am very offended by this. They know i am not Jewish. Its one thing to give it as a Hanukkah gift, but its not a proper e-gift. Its a gift for HIM not ME!!! I think it was very insensitive to do that!!!
I have no problem with celebrating Hanukkah and we even light a menorah, but its just a thoughtless engagement gift!
I don't know why, but it just bothers me a lot!!!
Misty Posted:

Re: Improper e-gift???

I had a very similar experience. I am jewish, fh is catholic...and someone gave us a Rosary for an e-gift.

Some people just don't get it. I doubt it was a personal thing, it was probably more of just the person's mindset.....
nrvbrd Posted:

Re: Improper e-gift???

Tracy, unfortunately people DO NOT think sometimes. This is one of those times.

HillandRon Posted:

Re: Improper e-gift???

When Jewish people get engaged, It is customary to gifts that are jewish related.
Unfortunately they probably didn't think that it would offend you.

I don't think it was intentional.



alina Posted:

Re: Improper e-gift???

Tracy, is it possible that the gifter thought of Menorah as one of those household things that you may need, same as say a bedspread.
I understand you may be upset, but it may just be a lack of thoughfulness or a misunderstanding.

tracyg Posted:

Re: Improper e-gift???

I know it wasn't intentional, i guess its just me. Just like I would never think of getting a couple a rosary (even if they were both catholic) or a cross to hang. I just think denominational gifts aren't the best to give. I think im also oversensitive since his grandmother on his other side is very Anti- Christmas and Christian, and we can't let her know we have a Christmas tree or let her know FH went to church (even when it was to see my dad preach). Don't get me wrong, she loves me and i like her, but it bothers me that she can be so judgemental.

Lisa Rose Posted:

Re: Improper e-gift???

Maybe they thought they would give you a gift of something that you would never buy for yourself. You did say that you light the candles, so just think of this as you one and only Menorah that you will ever have to own!
tracyg Posted:

Re: Improper e-gift???

We have a nice menorah already... I even bought it. We really didn't need a second one.

Jess2 Posted:

Re: Improper e-gift???

I don't think they did it to be insulting, they just didn't think. I'm with Hillary that sometimes people give gifts like that on special occasions, especially if they are somewhat religious themselves.

maysie18 Posted:

Re: Improper e-gift???

I doubt they were trying to be insensitive towards you. I'm sure you'll get some gifts that are non-Jewish as well & they shouldn't get offended either. Better get used to it I'm sure this kind of thing will happen for the rest of your life!

kmcwed Posted:

Re: Improper e-gift???

Sorry about your gift. On a lighter note.... My FI's best friend gave us a gift certificate to the Ground Round as an engagement gift!!! What the heck is THAT??

I would have rather had a menorah!! And we're both Catholic!

I wrote a very gracious 'Thank You' note anyway, and told them we could use it for a quiet evening out. FI and I are still tyring to figure out what the heck he was thinking....

KarenM

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