Brides Helping Brides ™ - In lieu of Stephanie's post about the Makeup Artist...

FutureJOC Posted: Dec 17, 2009 03:40 PM

In lieu of Stephanie's post about the Makeup Artist...

I'm starting to get really nervous about the fact that I only have the RH booked. People say it's too early but when stuff like what happened to Stephanie happens and a vendor you really want is already booked for more than 19 months in advance, it makes you wonder 'Is it really too early?'.

FH doesn't want to book things so early, but I am becoming more and more uneasy as we draw nearer to the 1 year mark. In 5 months we will have 1 year until the wedding and in my mind, I want to have all vendors booked before th 1 year mark. He doesn't see it as something to worry about but honestly, he's never the one worrying about anything WR. I'm the one doing all the research, finding photographers and florist and DJs, trying to get us the best deals and save $$ where we can, and all he ever does is just say 'Well I don't want to book now because what if they are not in business by the time our wedding roles around?' Seriously, there is so many times you can say that to me before it just becomes ridiculous and you are just trying to find excuses not to go meet with vendors or make decisions. Even my mother and some of my other family members are wondering why we haven't gone to meet with vendors yet.

My plan that I have is to make an appt. with the church the first week in January to meet with the priest we want and to book our date. After that is done than I want to start setting up appts to go meet with the photographers, DJs, and Florists. I would really like to have at least those vendors booked before the one year mark.

I just really wish he would stop making this so difficult. It's not like I haven't already expressed my feelings about this to him. He's just so damn stubborn sometimes.

Sorry for the vent but you ladies are the only ones that would understand!

WeezyGirl2354 Posted: Dec 17, 2009 03:52 PM

Re: In lieu of Stephanie's post about the Makeup Artist...

Jessie - girrrl, I totally hear you!

I think last night at the DJ meeting FH might have had a green light go off. Reason being one item we want from them is already booked for our wedding day and FH was like 'this early?' Finally the guy we were talking with talked to FH directly and said you need to book stuff ASAP!!! Right now is the best time b/c vendors are looking to make deals in the month of December. B/c they know come the new year brides will be out the door - you have the holidays, the new year and then Valentine's Day - all PRIME times for engagements.

Right now we have RH and the church booked and hoping to have a DJ by the end of the month - but I too share your fear. The church is making me SUPER anxious b/c of all the crap that needs to be done for the catholic church in order to get married there.

I don't have much advice for you - since I know you have voiced this to your FH, but all I can say is you are not alone in this. I almost feel like you wrote what I was thinking down for me.

FutureJOC Posted: Dec 17, 2009 04:00 PM

Re: In lieu of Stephanie's post about the Makeup Artist...

glad I'm not in this alone. He really just doesn't understand how quickly things get book when weddings are involved.

FutureMrsCarvell Posted: Dec 17, 2009 04:17 PM

Re: In lieu of Stephanie's post about the Makeup Artist...

Thanks for elaborating on my personal feelings Jessie....were all in the same boat......:( I'm getting nervous....since I only booked RH too

BellaBride27 Posted: Dec 17, 2009 04:21 PM

Re: In lieu of Stephanie's post about the Makeup Artist...

you are not alone at all...all we have booked is the RH too

JessNicole7EM Posted: Dec 17, 2009 04:35 PM

Re: In lieu of Stephanie's post about the Makeup Artist...

Jessie - would FH get mad if you went ahead and made a bunch of appointments on your own (on a day you know you're both free) and just tell him when he needs to come?

I kinda did this with a few things - I narrowed it down to who I wanted to see, made the appointments on days I know FH and I both have off - and just told him where to show up and he was fine with it for the most part.

Maybe you can start booking appts - sometimes it took me a month or two to even get an appt with some vendors because of scheduling conflicts so def try to convince him to start looking soon.

Sorry you're going through this.

dCa51899 Posted: Dec 17, 2009 04:42 PM

Re: In lieu of Stephanie's post about the Makeup Artist...

same here girls (as far as only booking the RH/church)!!!!! The only thing I can think of is to just make appointments and tell ur FH that you made an appt just to get some ideas and tell him that if he'd like to join you, then come! Guys don't understand these things...I feel like they lack the ability to see in the future and to get excited about things, then at the wedding they'll be like 'o wow, that was awesome!' but in the meantime, their excitement is lacking (or at least in my case sometimes)

FutureJOC Posted: Dec 17, 2009 04:46 PM

Re: In lieu of Stephanie's post about the Makeup Artist...

Posted by JessNicole7EM

Jessie - would FH get mad if you went ahead and made a bunch of appointments on your own (on a day you know you're both free) and just tell him when he needs to come?

I kinda did this with a few things - I narrowed it down to who I wanted to see, made the appointments on days I know FH and I both have off - and just told him where to show up and he was fine with it for the most part.

Maybe you can start booking appts - sometimes it took me a month or two to even get an appt with some vendors because of scheduling conflicts so def try to convince him to start looking soon.

Sorry you're going through this.

I am seriously considering doing just that. Weekends for the most part for him are completely free - he may occasionally have to work on a Saturday. For me I work every Saturday and every other Sunday until around 2 but I personally have no problem with meeting vendors after I get out of work. What I would ideally love to do is plan out 1 day where we both have off and meet with 3 photograpghers I am interested in who all work out of the NYC area. Then the other photogs I am interested in and the DJ are all in LI so I would try and schedule multiple appts. in one day for those. Florist I am not concerned about bringing FH along with - seriously, it's not his area of expertise so I would rather bring my mom or my MOH with me for that appt.

I'm just going to have to make him sit down with me, get out my calendar and plot out when we are going to do this and just try and make him understand how important this actually is.

WeezyGirl2354 Posted: Dec 17, 2009 04:56 PM

Re: In lieu of Stephanie's post about the Makeup Artist...

I'm just going to have to make him sit down with me, get out my calendar and plot out when we are going to do this and just try and make him understand how important this actually is.

That is what I had to do - we both brought our planners put them together and figured when it would be a good time to meet.

He gave me days and I just went ahead and booked the places - told him what date and time and we went together. I did the leg work - unfortunately they/men are the type that needs things spoon fed to them lol. I agree that doing so might be your best bet in getting things done.

And - I think it will help make you feel better and less stressed. Just knowing I have another DJ and photo appointment has made me feel a bit more at ease.

HoopsnYoyo Posted: Dec 17, 2009 05:29 PM

Re: In lieu of Stephanie's post about the Makeup Artist...

Dont worry.

I only have my RH and photographer booked. Im waiting until the holidays are over to book the rest of my vendors.

Dont be nervous about it!!!

FutureJOC Posted: Dec 17, 2009 08:07 PM

Re: In lieu of Stephanie's post about the Makeup Artist...

Little Update:

So since posting this earlier I got in a really anxious, almost depressed sort of mood. I said to myself as soon as I get home I am just going to come right out and tell him exactly what the deal is and I need him to just understand me. And that exactly what I did. I explained my reasonings fully to him and made it known that his reluctance to want to go visit and book at least the Photog and DJ as soon as possible was making me feel very uneasy and nervous that we are going to wind up with vendors we don't want.

FH actually understood how I felt and said although he's probably still going to ***** about it, he told me to go ahead and start making appts for early next year. I guess that's the best I could ask for.

ellie424 Posted: Dec 17, 2009 10:12 PM

Re: In lieu of Stephanie's post about the Makeup Artist...

Jessie..I'm so happy that you discussed this with your FH. Honestly, you are at an advantage right now because you still have a lot of time and can have your choice of vendors. In my opinion I think it's better to book earlier than later to ensure that a vendor will be available (especially for vendors that you're picky about). I'm really happy to hear that your FH was understanding and is okay with you making appointments after the new year!

dCa51899 Posted: Dec 17, 2009 10:34 PM

Re: In lieu of Stephanie's post about the Makeup Artist...

I'm so glad you talked to him and that he agreed to the appointments for the beginning of the year! That will make you feel a lot better! I agree with Alicia, I think its good to book early to ensure you get your pick of who you want. I couldn't imagine going to a vendor and worrying if they were available (but I guess it could happen as it did with Stephanie's MU artist), although I do understand where your FH is coming from with worrying if the vendor will go out of business. I think as long as you do your research and it is an established company, it should be fine.

Danielle41209 Posted: Dec 17, 2009 10:49 PM

Re: In lieu of Stephanie's post about the Makeup Artist...

Posted by BellaBride27

you are not alone at all...all we have booked is the RH too

IA

I'm afraid to look in person because I'll want to book things and I don't have the funds...

MikesBride2B Posted: Dec 17, 2009 11:11 PM

Re: In lieu of Stephanie's post about the Makeup Artist...

When all is said and done we'll have a 15 month engagement...by the time the 1 year mark rolled around, we had all our major vendors except for a videographer and an officiant (we're not doing limos). I don't think its too early for you to start booking...its almost 2010 after all. If you were over 2 years away I'd say wait, because you might regret a decision you make so far out...but I think now is the right time for you to book those things.

Also, you are not alone...I do ALLLLLL the research and price comparison for the wedding...FH has basically just come to some vendor appts with me and then mostly said 'whatever you want'. So I know how you feel

I HTH!

netsirk10 Posted: Dec 17, 2009 11:51 PM

Re: In lieu of Stephanie's post about the Makeup Artist...

honestly i had most of my vendors booked within the first 6 months of my 2 year engagement. what i would suggest is sticking with companies that are well known and well established so that you do not have to concern yourself with them going out of business. also, i would try selling your fh with booking early based on the idea that prices could increase and you want to lock in the lower prices now. hth!

heathery72 Posted: Dec 18, 2009 07:19 AM

Re: In lieu of Stephanie's post about the Makeup Artist...

My Fh has given me some issues about booking things too early.. (arg). I think you need to point out to him that your wedding is is in one of the most popular months to get married. I would hate to fall in love with a vendor and have them be booked already. (we haven't had to deal with that yet but we are in the off season.) You can save money by booking early and deposits can be less. Sorry this is long

FutureJOC Posted: Dec 18, 2009 07:30 AM

Re: In lieu of Stephanie's post about the Makeup Artist...

Thank you girls for all the advice!!

WeezyGirl2354 Posted: Dec 18, 2009 09:05 AM

Re: In lieu of Stephanie's post about the Makeup Artist...

Posted by FutureJOC

Little Update:

So since posting this earlier I got in a really anxious, almost depressed sort of mood. I said to myself as soon as I get home I am just going to come right out and tell him exactly what the deal is and I need him to just understand me. And that exactly what I did. I explained my reasonings fully to him and made it known that his reluctance to want to go visit and book at least the Photog and DJ as soon as possible was making me feel very uneasy and nervous that we are going to wind up with vendors we don't want.

FH actually understood how I felt and said although he's probably still going to ***** about it, he told me to go ahead and start making appts for early next year. I guess that's the best I could ask for.

Jessie - this is great! I am glad you dished all the details to him and he is some what on board. That's all you can really ask for - its a great first step!