I've lost quite a few loved ones, including my dad and my FH has lost his mother. We are doing things to incorporate them into our wedding day like using a rememberance unity candle and posting pics of them around the reception. I would like to do more though - does anyone have any ideas what else I could do?
EJSD2006
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Re: In rememberance...
Both sets of our grandparents are deceased and we are going to miss them on our day. We want to leave 2 seats empty on each side and have the Priest do a special blessing for them in heaven to let them know we miss them and wish they could be with us to celebrate.
Boop2704
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Re: In rememberance...
Please don't take this the wrong way, but I think that a memorial candle and maybe a pic or two is enough. I am not saying this to be mean, but I know how important these people are to you and they would want you to celebrate the day, not have a ton of reminders that they are gone that will sadden you.
My brother passed away and in our ceremony we started off with, as soon as I walked down the isle, the priest announced we were going to light a candle to signify my brother being there with us. They played Ave Maria and DH and I walked up together and lit the candle in his memory. We also included a poem in the last page of our program and a memorian to my brother. We didn't have a dry eye at the ceremony when we lit that candle.
I am very sorry for your losses!!
Mrs. dleeny
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Re: In rememberance...
we're doing a 'memorial table' for FH's dad. we're putting an 8x10 picture on it and a pillar candle with a candle ring on the table.
the table will be set up at the reception behind the sweetheart table.
prinses777
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Re: In rememberance...
In addition to doing what you are doing, I am also going to make a donation in my father's honor. I am pretty sure this will be in addition to a favor. And a passage in my programs.
Good luck!
Goldi1021
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Re: In rememberance...
Posted by Boop2704
Please don't take this the wrong way, but I think that a memorial candle and maybe a pic or two is enough. I am not saying this to be mean, but I know how important these people are to you and they would want you to celebrate the day, not have a ton of reminders that they are gone that will sadden you.
I agree.
I just lost my father this past July. My mother requested not to make much mention of his recent passing at the wedding. She does not want the joy and celebration to be mixed with sadness. His name will be in the program. My parents and FH's parents wedding photos will be on the cake table but thats it. It was very hard and (still is hard) to plan our wedding while I am still grieving. If my father knew that my sadness over his death preceded my joy, he would be quite upset.
EmberLynn
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Re: In rememberance...
Well my FH lost his dog of 13 yrs a few years ago. I made a small statue of the dog, (girls the statue is only six inches and made of plaster) and the bestman is going to carry it to the alter and put it on the floor on the grooms side of the alter.
toddlerteacher
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Re: In rememberance...
awe i am sooo sorry for your loss and your FH loss. I went to a wedding where the bride had lost her father and she had made a video of her father (in memory of him) like when she was growing up and stuff like that...it was so sad there was not a dry eye at the wedding..you could do something like that..HTH
MrsH1156
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Re: In rememberance...
I lost my Mom a few years ago. At the ceremony, I am going to have a small bouquet of white roses which will be placed on the seat where she would have been sitting. At the reception, I am going to have a floating candle with a small poem. I am so sorry for your losses.
janwinterbridejoy
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Re: In rememberance...
i lost my dad and he was a huge part of my life so anyone at the wedding knew this and just how hard not having him there was going to be for me. i wrote a short letter to him and put it in the church program and had the priest mention him in the homily. but the nicest thing i did was have my videographer make a tribute with video and pictures that we played after my brother my man of honor made his toast which mentioned how much my dad was missed at the wedding and it made a nice segway into the tribute., it was sad and yes i did cry so did a lot of people even ones that never knew him but still to this day when i see people that were at the wedding i get compliments about of moving and lovely the tribute was. it was sad for a few mins at the reception but it boucnces back and i truly felt he was there with me
Elysedara
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Re: In rememberance...
I, too, lost my father several years ago. We displayed some pictures. The hard part for me was deciding what to do about the father-daughter dance. I didn't want to omit it, since I felt like that didn't honor him. In the end, I decided to dance with my brother, and my mother joined us. I then had the DJ invite everyone with fond memories of my father to join us on the dance floor. It was a lot easier to miss my father knowing all of our old friends and family were there, supporting me, and missing him too. I know some people thought that on a happy day like a wedding you shouldn't spend time thinking of loss. But even at our happiest days, we remember those who are no longer with us. I'm sorry for all of you who have suffered the loss of a close family member.
DayBeforeThanksgiving
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Re: In rememberance...
Posted by Boop2704
Please don't take this the wrong way, but I think that a memorial candle and maybe a pic or two is enough. I am not saying this to be mean, but I know how important these people are to you and they would want you to celebrate the day, not have a ton of reminders that they are gone that will sadden you.
My brother passed away and in our ceremony we started off with, as soon as I walked down the isle, the priest announced we were going to light a candle to signify my brother being there with us. They played Ave Maria and DH and I walked up together and lit the candle in his memory. We also included a poem in the last page of our program and a memorian to my brother. We didn't have a dry eye at the ceremony when we lit that candle.
I am very sorry for your losses!!
I couldn't agree more with this. I lost my Dad 5 years ago, and I'm doing a candle at the church and a poem in the program. I will then bring the candle to the reception and let it burn there as well, with the poem in a frame next to it.
You don't want to overdue it or else you will be too sad to enjoy your happy day.
m&m2005
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Re: In rememberance...
I wanted to include certain family members in our mass but kinda in the background, so I had their names mentioned during the Prayer of the Faithful and in the program. For my DH's father and our grandparents I had 2 vases of red roses used on either side of the the altar and 2 memorial candles place in front of each of them - my DH father and his grandparents on one side and both sets of my grandparents on the other. The vases were taken to the hall and used on a table on each side of the hall. I had the memorial candles placed with the wedding pictures of our parents and grandparents (I also made candles for other family members who were important to my parents and some of the widows were taken back by it, they love it because we remembered them). I used antique frames since the pictures were black and white which gave it a warm feeling. The candles were lit before everyone came into the hall and it had such a glow to it. It actually took my breath away when I saw my table with my grandparents photos and my parents wedding photo in the center with the candles and rose petals staggered inbetween.... for me it reinforced the feeling that they were there with me. At the end of the reception DH's mother was given the roses from his table and my mom should have gotten our vase to take to the cemetery (I wanted it place on my grandma's site - I missed her so much that day) but someone on my DH side took it without asking. Each candle was given to a family member to take home. I actually found my FIL's candle in my MIL kitchen (spends alot of time in there) which surprised me.
I have seen donations in there memory to a favorite charity. My FH father passed away. We where close and I will carry a small picture of him with my Bo-K. How ever you do it its you special day with special memories.
Beth1210
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Re: In rememberance...
Posted by Goldi1021
Posted by Boop2704
Please don't take this the wrong way, but I think that a memorial candle and maybe a pic or two is enough. I am not saying this to be mean, but I know how important these people are to you and they would want you to celebrate the day, not have a ton of reminders that they are gone that will sadden you.
I agree.
I just lost my father this past July. My mother requested not to make much mention of his recent passing at the wedding. She does not want the joy and celebration to be mixed with sadness. His name will be in the program. My parents and FH's parents wedding photos will be on the cake table but thats it. It was very hard and (still is hard) to plan our wedding while I am still grieving. If my father knew that my sadness over his death preceded my joy, he would be quite upset.
I agree also- I lost my Mom 14 months ago
All I am doing is a donation in her honor- I really am not into all of this memeorial stuff and I know she wouldn't have liked it
happytobeabride
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Re: In rememberance...
Both of my FH's parents have passed and I am wondering how other groom's in the same situation handled the mother/son dance? Was it eliminated? or did another family member stand in i.e. older sister? I want to be as sensitive as I can to him and his family. On another note, it is nice to hear the different ways that people are expressing honor to their loved ones that passed.
diluvchu
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Re: In rememberance...
Posted by happytobeabride
Both of my FH's parents have passed and I am wondering how other groom's in the same situation handled the mother/son dance? Was it eliminated? or did another family member stand in i.e. older sister? I want to be as sensitive as I can to him and his family. On another note, it is nice to hear the different ways that people are expressing honor to their loved ones that passed.
Both of my FH's parents are deceased as well. He asked his Godmother to dance with him (His mother's sister). At first he wasn't going to do anything, but now with all the wedding planning I see that it is really starting to bother him not having his mother there. His father's gone too, but that affects him less. We aren't doing any memorials, no candles, no nothing. Everyone knows they have passed, it doesn't need to be mentioned.
mtdr1106
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Re: In rememberance...
Posted by prinses777
In addition to doing what you are doing, I am also going to make a donation in my father's honor. I am pretty sure this will be in addition to a favor. And a passage in my programs.
Good luck!
this is a beautiful way to keep someones memory alive. i am very sorry for your loss.
atlast62506
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Re: In rememberance...
i am def doing something for those that have passed on.....one thing we thought of is there is a specific reading that can be done during the mass which is really nice
