FMIL knows a Jeweler that hooks her up. They're old friends and he gives her things at cost.
She said she bought a few things from them for FH and I to possibly give our Koumbara and her mother and father.
Couple problems here:
1- I told FMIL that I wanted to get Koumbara a nice bag
2- I told FMIL that we'd get her parents a nice bottle of something
I also told her that I think it's inappropriate for a younger person to give an older person something like jewelry and that SHE should give it all to them, not me.
She seemed slightly perplexed by this. I know I shouldn't look a gift horse in the mouth and save all the money I can by using what she got at the jewelry store, but those gifts won't mean anything coming from me and FH... Am I wrong? Am I the one being inappropriate?
PS: I never saw the jewelry, but she doesn't have the greatest taste
GiannisWifey
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Re: Inappropriate of FMIL? or me?
ummm well i would be annoyed. You are old enough to make your own decisions and choose/purchase a gift that you want to give. The saving $ part is great, but she should have let you and FH pick the jewlery, not her.
AwaitingAugust
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Re: Inappropriate of FMIL? or me?
i see nothing wrong with a younger person giving an older person jewelry ... i don't think i'd have a problem with it (unless the jewelry she got is butt-ugly )
Becca2010
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Re: Inappropriate of FMIL? or me?
She kept telling us to go, but we never did because we didn't want to do it. I was about to say maybe it's my fault for not telling her we didn't want to do that, but I DID tell her I wanted to get Koumbara a bag and a bottle for her parents. I feel bad because I know she's trying to help, but we never asked her to do these things... ugh!
NanandEric08
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Re: Inappropriate of FMIL? or me?
I agree with you. Being that you chose this person for a reason, YOU should be the one to think about what you want to give that person. If you give her a gift that you didn't even pick out, it has less meaning. I personally love putting thought into gifts that I give to people, so I wouldn't like giving her something that was picked out for me.
On the flip side, maybe she was just doing it to be nice and save you guys some cash but she should have asked you to atleast come with her and look at the stuff before purchasing it.
FutureCap
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Re: Inappropriate of FMIL? or me?
it would bother me..... if its a gift coming from you and FH i think it is presumptuous for her to go and pick something out if you did not ask her to or agree to it.
GiannisWifey
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Re: Inappropriate of FMIL? or me?
Yeah it is supposed to be a gift of meaning coming from you and FH that you picked out knowing/hoping she will like it and with your tastes in mind. The fact that she tried to save you $$ is great, but its the fact that she took it upon herself to purchase something, then sprining it on you, is what makes it annoying and rude.
AwaitingAugust
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Re: Inappropriate of FMIL? or me?
i do agree that she shouldn't have bought the jewelry if she knew that you wanted to buy her a nice bag .... that part is annoying ... but she was trying to help so don't get too mad at it.
Jna2010
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Re: Inappropriate of FMIL? or me?
Posted by GiannisWifey
ummm well i would be annoyed. You are old enough to make your own decisions and choose/purchase a gift that you want to give. The saving $ part is great, but she should have let you and FH pick the jewlery, not her.
i agree with not having a say in gifts, i dont see anything wrong with a younger person giving jewelry to an older person though, maybe you can give her money and this way its a gift from all of you?
Becca2010
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Re: Inappropriate of FMIL? or me?
Posted by AwaitingAugust
i do agree that she shouldn't have bought the jewelry if she knew that you wanted to buy her a nice bag .... that part is annoying ... but she was trying to help so don't get too mad at it.
I know, I'm not really angry about it because her heart was in the right place, just not so much her head
lela7378
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Re: Inappropriate of FMIL? or me?
I think that you have a right to your own opinion. I dont see a problem with giving an older person jewelry.
The only think I find innapropriate is that you told pushy FMIL that you HAVE PICKED OUT GIFTS!
Why don't people LISTEN?
grkbarbie
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let her give it to the..but also give the the gifts u originally were going to
Becca2010
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Yeah that's what I told her to do anyway.
GR2010
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I would be annoyed. Even if it is going to save me money I would rather buy them something that meant something coming from me. I completely agree with you.
cleokizzy
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Re: Inappropriate of FMIL? or me?
i'd def be annoyed if i were in your shoes... you'd want to give something thats coming from you & FI to make it more personal.
