Inserts for people bringing children...what do you think? Too mean or to the point?(REWRITTEN)
We would like for your children to come and be a part of our special day. If you choose to bring your children a babysitter will be provided to help watch over them. The children will be seated with thier parents during mealtime . The venue is on the water so for the safety of the children they will not be allowed outside the banquet room without being accompanied by a parent or adult.
THE ABOVE IS THE EDITED VERSION. WHAT IS YOUR OPINION? Thank you!
bettybcafe
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Re: Inserts for people bringing children...what do you think? Too mean or to the point?
I think its perfect. Straight to the point and not at all offensive.
EastEndBride
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Re: Inserts for people bringing children...what do you think? Too mean or to the point?
I think you might want to spread this by word of mouth so nobody gets the wrong tone. I would like to think that people are smart enough to know that they should watch their own children at a formal event...but maybe just a gentle verbal reminder would do the trick. jmo.
EverlovingEv
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Re: Inserts for people bringing children...what do you think? Too mean or to the point?
I think the babysitter is comment is necessary b/c I don't think it's common sense to everyone invited. But I'd verbally tell my guests the other stuff.
heatherandrichie
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Re: Inserts for people bringing children...what do you think? Too mean or to the point?
I agree on the tone. I have a problem upsetting people wiht the verbiage I choose. Maybe you could start it off by 'For your childrens safety, we ask that you...' Blah blah blah. Something like that?
Re: Inserts for people bringing children...what do you think? Too mean or to the point?
See, I thought it sounded harsh and I don't mean it in a harsh way at all. Honestly, my main concern is that I don't want them outside bc of the water. It's the only thing i'm really worried about.
milana
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Re: Inserts for people bringing children...what do you think? Too mean or to the point?
Yea i agree i would start it off in stead with 'For your childrens safety please'....blah blah blah
soon2bmrsVPT
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Re: Inserts for people bringing children...what do you think? Too mean or to the point?(REWRITTEN)
I think the edited version is PERFECT!
EverlovingEv
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Re: Inserts for people bringing children...what do you think? Too mean or to the point?(REWRITTEN)
Edited version is much better
PegaLega
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Re: Inserts for people bringing children...what do you think? Too mean or to the point?(REWRITTEN)
I think the edited version is perfect.
Snowflake08
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Re: Inserts for people bringing children...what do you think? Too mean or to the point?(REWRITTEN)
Posted by bettybcafe
I think its perfect. Straight to the point and not at all offensive.
ditto
butapecan3
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Re: Inserts for people bringing children...what do you think? Too mean or to the point?(REWRITTEN)
that sounds good
snydl40
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Re: Inserts for people bringing children...what do you think? Too mean or to the point?(REWRITTEN)
What a great idea! Not rude at all.
mskittynj
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Re: Inserts for people bringing children...what do you think? Too mean or to the point?(REWRITTEN)
Not offensive at all! Direct and to the point!!! XOXOXO Kitty
sugarkube4
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Re: Inserts for people bringing children...what do you think? Too mean or to the point?(REWRITTEN)
I didn't see the first version, but I think this one is good!!!
