I'm nowhere near ready to send out invitations but I'm pretty sure my boss is expecting one and I'm really anxious about it. Very few people like her and last year's holiday party was canceled because over 50% of the staff said that they would not attend if she did!!! I get along with her (for the most part) but I'm not inviting her because we are not that close. I will however invite most of the office staff and a few co-workers. I think she will be hurt by this and I'm really worried that work will become impossible for after that. It's childish but it's reality.
I was thinking about saying, 'I wish I could invite everyone but it's just not possible. ' Any suggestions? Please help!!!!!
Butterfly123
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Re: Invitation nightmare!
Ooh thats tough. So youre not inviting her cause no one else likes her?
MissMath
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Re: Invitation nightmare!
Its a hard call. I would never be offended if i wasn't invited to a coworkers wedding. But unfortunately I know people will be. There is nothing I can do about it. If I could invite everyone I would. Jsut invite those you are truly close with and everyone else will understand (hoepfully).
GinaZ
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Re: Invitation nightmare!
Hmmm this is totally a hard one since you are inviting other people in the office. If you wern't inviting any of them or like only one of them, then you can just say it is a small wedding. Do you think there is anyway people won't say anything so she finds out they are all invited?
kimnsteve
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Re: Invitation nightmare!
im sorry but i have to say its either all of them or none ....you dont wanna hurt anyones feelng especially a boss ...im in the same boat and i havent decided if i am inviting anyone yet
FutureMrsCarrieri
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Re: Invitation nightmare!
I'm not inviting her because we're not that close and, honestly, I'm afraid she'll ruin my co-workers good time because they all hate her.
I'm pretty sure she'll find out -- someone will mention something about it and then I'll be on her s#$% list...
JoesFutureWife
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Re: Invitation nightmare!
I would definitely mention that you would love to invite everyone however with you are unable to because of either budget or guest list....something along those lines.
NC1011
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Re: Invitation nightmare!
I think that if you dont invite her, and you do invite a significant amount of co-workers, she will most likely find out and depending on her personality, it may make things very awkward at work. I would say that it's not worth it to NOT invite her only b/c it could end up bad and who wants that kind of work environment. As for the others, they really shouldnt be telling you that they wont come to your wedding based on one other person. IMO, people who are asked to be a guest at someones affair, and then start dictating their demands are pretty nervy. That's jut my opinion thought. I say just invite her and sit her at a different table or split up your co-workers and seat her with the ones who you know will be tolerant for the evening.
FutureMrsCarrieri
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Re: Invitation nightmare!
Posted by NC1011
I think that if you dont invite her, and you do invite a significant amount of co-workers, she will most likely find out and depending on her personality, it may make things very awkward at work. I would say that it's not worth it to NOT invite her only b/c it could end up bad and who wants that kind of work environment. As for the others, they really shouldnt be telling you that they wont come to your wedding based on one other person. IMO, people who are asked to be a guest at someones affair, and then start dictating their demands are pretty nervy. That's jut my opinion thought. I say just invite her and sit her at a different table or split up your co-workers and seat her with the ones who you know will be tolerant for the evening.
No one has actually told me that they won't come if she's invited. I just hate being put in this position!!!! Part of me feels like, 'This is my freakin wedding and I'll invite who I want' and the other part realizes that I have to return to that place after the wedding and I have tread lightly.
Thanks for all of your suggestions and input!!! I feel better just talking about it
NC1011
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Re: Invitation nightmare!
Posted by FutureMrsCarrieri
Posted by NC1011
I think that if you dont invite her, and you do invite a significant amount of co-workers, she will most likely find out and depending on her personality, it may make things very awkward at work. I would say that it's not worth it to NOT invite her only b/c it could end up bad and who wants that kind of work environment. As for the others, they really shouldnt be telling you that they wont come to your wedding based on one other person. IMO, people who are asked to be a guest at someones affair, and then start dictating their demands are pretty nervy. That's jut my opinion thought. I say just invite her and sit her at a different table or split up your co-workers and seat her with the ones who you know will be tolerant for the evening.
No one has actually told me that they won't come if she's invited. I just hate being put in this position!!!! Part of me feels like, 'This is my freakin wedding and I'll invite who I want' and the other part realizes that I have to return to that place after the wedding and I have tread lightly.
Thanks for all of your suggestions and input!!! I feel better just talking about it
I know what you mean. My friend who is also getting married was talking with me earlier today about how annoying it is that it's supposed to be your day and yet somehow you end up feeling like you have to please everyone else.
It's tough. Lots of luck and maybe it's a good idea to just feel it out as the time gets closer.
FutureMrsCarrieri
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Re: Invitation nightmare!
That's exactly how I feel!!!! Like I have to please everyone! It's very annoying!!!!!
Lately, when I'm stressed, I imagine myself walking down the aisle toward him.... I imagine the look on his face.
I know at that moment I'll feel like it was all worth it.
bemyyoko
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Re: Invitation nightmare!
unfortunately, if you are inviting a lot of the staff I'd say you have to invite her. Which goes against my normal reply of 'it's YOUR wedding, do what YOU want'
In this case... it's a little tougher to say that. A lot of people invite their boss out of courtesy. We are inviting FH's bosses(husband and wife team type deal)
We are not inviting the rest of the staff. We just can't afford it.
However, I personally would never be able to invite the rest of the staff and not them. it just seems rude to me especially if you get along with her.
You can't really use the 'we couldn't afford it' excuse if you're inviting a large majority of your coworkers. You could always invite her, but tell her to keep it on the downlow b/c you couldn't afford to invite everyone else. That way they won't all know ahead of time that she was invited.
Your wedding is a lot different than a company party where she'd be in charge and what not.
