I never would have guessed how much of a problem invitations would be...
I am having a somewhat small wedding with a min of 85. We wanted to keep it as close to the min as possible. (my parents are paying that part and have been real strict. I also want to respect them and their contribution)
On the RSVP we chose to do the '____ seats have been reserved in your honour' thing. We wrote how many seats in the blank the were getting.
Why are people changing that number or telling me they haven't RSVP cause they don't know the number yet and mention larger numbers than what was written for them??? It drives my mom nuts when she sees the RSVP like that cause she wants to try and stick to her budget.
I personally have received wedding invitations with it and never even thought to question or change that number.
Is anyone else doing this?
If so, do you have the same prob?
what should i do???? How do you politely handle that??
msj288
Posted:
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Invitation problem
I've done the same since I've had family members mention to my mom 'so and so are coming too' when I only addressed the save the date to them. On the RSVP we have the exact same wording as you, to avoid any confusion as to who is invited. I would call whoever it is that isn't respecting that number and politely tell them that the number written is the amount allocated to them, and you're firm on this to keep within your budget. I know its frustrating, but i'm sure if you explain that to them, they'll be understanding.
QueensNYC
Posted:
Member since
Invitation problem
Chels, I have the same wording as you do to get the point across to invitees. I have had only one person call and ask if s/he can bring another person. I was a bit annoyed in the first instance but she has done a lot for me as I was growing up so I gave her a courtesy since we already had some invitees decline our invitation. If faced with the situation again I would probably do what msj288 suggested- stand firm. I twill be awkward but do what is best for your bottom line.
MissToMrs
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Invitation problem
This oh I can bring whoever with no regard to cost absolutely flores me. My cousin said oh my bf & I booked our flights for your wedding I said oh didn't know you were dating anyone and no where in my save the date did it include a guest for you. She is mad at me and says she isnt coming but i told her what makes you think you have the right to just add someone on because that's MY money I would have to spend I can't believe people. put the kibosh on that asap and have no problem saying something they don't like it find then don't come talk to me when you pay for a wedding!!!!! This is one thing that absolutely flores me
Chels
Posted:
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Invitation problem
I dont understand people?!
I had the same situation @MissToMrs.
You ladies are right you just gotta put your foot down. They dont like it... they dont have to come
It's just so fustrating when people have no consideration for the wedding and cost of it!
killerqueen
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Invitation problem
I agree with everyone else. As annoying as it can be to put your foot down with something like that, you have to. It's rude of them to assume that you'll just be okay with paying for their plates as well. Plainly explain to them that you have a budget to keep to and unfortunately that means only allowing a limited number of people to attend. If they don't understand that's on them, not you.
Star625
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Invitation problem
Definitely put your foot down. I didn't with my Step Father's family and I wish I had. I addressed the invite to his sister and niece. They replied back with 4 to include their boyfriends. I let it slide because they are 'family' and I had met the boyfriends before. The day of the wedding only 3 showed up because the niece broke up with her boyfriend and they only gave $50 for the 3 of them. Now I actually didn't expect any cash from them at all, but they had the nerve to be extremely demanding and rude as if they'd contributed anything at all. I really would have been fine if they didn't come because I didn't allow the 2 add ons. I would have invited better people.
Chels
Posted:
Member since
Re: Invitation problem
Posted by Star625
Definitely put your foot down. I didn't with my Step Father's family and I wish I had. I addressed the invite to his sister and niece. They replied back with 4 to include their boyfriends. I let it slide because they are 'family' and I had met the boyfriends before. The day of the wedding only 3 showed up because the niece broke up with her boyfriend and they only gave $50 for the 3 of them. Now I actually didn't expect any cash from them at all, but they had the nerve to be extremely demanding and rude as if they'd contributed anything at all. I really would have been fine if they didn't come because I didn't allow the 2 add ons. I would have invited better people.
