Is anyone else...

FH moved to North Carolina last August and we picked the place out together. He's still renting, and I'm going to move into his place there when I move down there after the wedding.

Those of you who live together already... is this going to be a total shock to me once I move in? I'm a little nervous because we've never lived together (but we do spend a week at a time together when he's in NY or I'm there, so it's like living together...)

Just curious what you all think...

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Posted by springsandra

Those of you who live together already... is this going to be a total shock to me once I move in? I'm a little nervous because we've never lived together (but we do spend a week at a time together when he's in NY or I'm there, so it's like living together...)

Just curious what you all think...

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it may or may not be.... i assure you will see that your fh has little quirks about him that you've never seen before... how you handle those depends on what type of person you are... lol

for instance, fh will not completely scrape off food into garbage before putting dish in sink... thats something that annoys me... lol ... he also gets up in the middle of the night to snack on something... another quirk that i dont get at all.. its things like that that you will learn to adjust to... im sure theres things my fh doesnt like about my living habits too...

essentially, you will prob be just fine living together... at first its like the HM phase... you just love that you 2 always get to sleep next to one another each night... no fights... everything is great... then of course that wears off... like everything else that becomes old...

We're looking, but FH also thinks it's completely appropriate to continue living at home, separately, after we are married if we cannot find a house because he really doesn't want to 'waste money on an apartment'.

I really wake up every morning wanting to hang myself. I'm not even kidding anymore.

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Posted by FuTuRe MrS MaZz

it may or may not be.... i assure you will see that your fh has little quirks about him that you've never seen before... how you handle those depends on what type of person you are... lol

for instance, fh will not completely scrape off food into garbage before putting dish in sink... thats something that annoys me... lol ... he also gets up in the middle of the night to snack on something... another quirk that i dont get at all.. its things like that that you will learn to adjust to... im sure theres things my fh doesnt like about my living habits too...

essentially, you will prob be just fine living together... at first its like the HM phase... you just love that you 2 always get to sleep next to one another each night... no fights... everything is great... then of course that wears off... like everything else that becomes old...

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Lol, that's funny!

Thanks for the great advice! I figure in the 'old days' people never used to live together before so I'm not in completely foreign territory. It's exciting to have that to look forward to after we're married, too.

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Posted by coldasice217

We're looking, but FH also thinks it's completely appropriate to continue living at home, separately, after we are married if we cannot find a house because he really doesn't want to 'waste money on an apartment'.

I really wake up every morning wanting to hang myself. I'm not even kidding anymore.

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Maybe you can find a place you can rent short term while you look for a house...maybe after the wedding night FH will change his mind

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Posted by springsandra

FH moved to North Carolina last August and we picked the place out together. He's still renting, and I'm going to move into his place there when I move down there after the wedding.

Those of you who live together already... is this going to be a total shock to me once I move in? I'm a little nervous because we've never lived together (but we do spend a week at a time together when he's in NY or I'm there, so it's like living together...)

Just curious what you all think...

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FH and I had a hard time when we first moved in together BUT I am a neat freak and he is a total mess so most of our arguements were about house keeping issues.

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Posted by FutureMrsG

FH and I had a hard time when we first moved in together BUT I am a neat freak and he is a total mess so most of our arguements were about house keeping issues.

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I'm a bit worried he's going to make me do everything around the house, like cooking and cleaning and stuff, the way his mom does at his parents' home. But she never worked when he was growing up, and I'm a 30 y/o attorney who works 10-12 hour days (at least in NY I do). the idea of coming home every night to cook and clean worries me.

So far it seems like I can get him to take out the garbage when it comes up. He's good at straightening up around the house, but doesn't vacuum or anything. I guess we'll see how it works out. I'm the kind of girl who will put my foot down and just refuse to keep doing everything myself if it comes to that, but I'm not making plans to be stubborn. I know this is going to be a lot about compromise.

I also told him I'll continue to do the dishes if he'll cook.

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Posted by lady_movements

the trick is the first few weeks of living together... get him into the habit of doing certain chores and those will remain him... if you end up doing it yourself, their yours...

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Great advice! FH and I are moving in together next week. We had wanted to wait until after the wedding but didn't want to let summer in the City pass us by while living separately. We had been house hunting but decided to enjoy a year of marriage in a luxury apartment- I only bring that up because we've heard it said that it's 'wasting money' since the rent is more that lots of mortgages.

Honestly.....it's a lifestyle choice. You only get this phase once in your life. We want some time before we have to worry about repairs/taxes/upgrades...and we want the city at our feet and a concierge.

My advice is for you guys to decide what you want to do and where you see yourselves in a year- as most leases are 1 year. The year will fly, enjoy it!

Things definitly change when you move in together.. FH and I have lived together for a while!! Sometimes you still have to remind them to pick up and cook or do things to compromise!!

Regardless I think we have learned a lot from eachother!! Its been a great experience..

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Posted by coldasice217

We're looking, but FH also thinks it's completely appropriate to continue living at home, separately, after we are married if we cannot find a house because he really doesn't want to 'waste money on an apartment'.

I really wake up every morning wanting to hang myself. I'm not even kidding anymore.

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I feel ya!

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Posted by jlt2010

FH and I are looking for a house. he's currently staying with me at my mom's.

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I wish we were even looking. FH is out of work and no one is calling him back! It's so frustrating.