My Mom is my best friend, I talk to her everyday. After i met my fh but before we got engaged all she told me was how happy she was for me and how much she liked him, now that I am engaged she wants nothing to do with anything. She has been telling me for months she would help me finish registering, but shes always 'too busy' even though she only works two afternoons a week. And my fiance and I are paying for this wedding, she offered to pay for my dress and the flowers, but now all of a sudden shes pretending like she never said it, is telling me how shes so broke and has no money, but since then has had a new bathroom put in, and is now ripping down and rebuilding the back room of the house. I feel like shes rubbing it in my face. If she didnt want to pay for the flowers she never should have said it and waited a few months until after the wedding to do all this work. My feelings are very hurt, and I dont know what to do. At this point I dont even want her money, but i dont want this ruining my relationship with her. Sorry its so long, hoping someone has some advice. Thanks!
Boop2704
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Re: Is anyone else having a problem with there moms?
Sounds like she is in denial of losing her little girl. Have a serious heart to heart soon.
smooch
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Re: Is anyone else having a problem with there moms?
I'd have a chat with her and ask her what's going on. The only way to know for sure is to ask. Ask her what's going on with her, why she is withdrawing, because I think, like Boop said, that she is sad to lose her daughter.
kelly6273
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Re: Is anyone else having a problem with there moms?
Try to talk to her and tell her exactly how you are feeling! I hope everything works out!!!
Xelindrya
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Re: Is anyone else having a problem with there moms?
poor darling..
I hope everything works out for you.
it could be worse.. my stepmother and I barely talk and when we do it's always civil and cold. My real mother.. well ... lets just say she's not invited.
Good luck!
butterfly20
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Re: Is anyone else having a problem with there moms?
Definately have a talk with her, she might be feeling a little jealous and that you getting married means less time and priority to her.
Maribelle7777
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Re: Is anyone else having a problem with there moms?
I'm sorry this is happening to you. I think that maybe your mom is feeling sad that you are engaged and eventually 'leaving' her. Which is not true of course. Have a serious heart to heart with her about it and calm her fears taht you will still be around and always her best friend!
rasckulsbride
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Re: Is anyone else having a problem with there moms?
Your lucky to have a Mom who's your best friend. I agree with the other girls......she's probably upset about losing her 'little girl' and best friend at the same time. I would sit her down and have a heart to heart with her before it's too late. My Mom and I had a falling out and I haven't spoken to her in years. This situation also ruined my relationship with my Dad and brothers. I don't even think I'm inviting any of them to my wedding. Consider yourself lucky....I wish I could talk to my Mom about all this wedding stuff. Hang in there...I'm sure you'll work everything out!
korkev313
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Re: Is anyone else having a problem with there moms?
I just wanted to say thank you girls! This was my first post on this site, and you are all so nice! I know i have to talk to her, its just hard sometimes. You guys are great!
sept20yay!
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Re: Is anyone else having a problem with there moms?
My wedding experience has completely RUINED my relationship with my parents. This year was the best in my life- I am marrying my guardian angel- but the price I paid was heavy for it. It was the worst year in a lot of ways. My father, divorced from my mother, won't speak with me and has been unspeakably emotionally abusive. He is cruel and I'm sorry, an evil man. My mother has been so into herself throughout the planning that I have done everything myself! I'm 25 and I work a full time job. My parents through the 13 months have been unbareable and unforgivable in their selfish actions.
I understand and big HUGS.
jenny2penny
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Re: Is anyone else having a problem with there moms?
I am so sorry to hear you are not happy, and it's with your mother. If you are so close to her, talk to her and see why the sudden change in attitude. Maybe there is a reason for it.
Irishbride
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Re: Is anyone else having a problem with there moms?
to you. I know what you are going through. I have seen not to nice sides of my Mom since we got engaged. I finally had to tell her that she was really hurting me by the way she has been acting. It seems to have helped a lttle. My relationship will her will def not be the same.
LImom
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Re: Is anyone else having a problem with there moms?
If I may add my two cents here, I would say by all means talk to her and see if she was offended by something inadvertantly done. Is there a FMIL involved that she may feel is taking over her role? She may become defensive and just ask why you are asking. I would strongly advise not to mention the flowers or the money. Promised to you or not, money is always a sensitive subject and in my opinion, not something you should ask for. Her husband (is that your Dad?) may have told her she spoke without consulting him and he may not agree with it. Please do all you can to mend the fences. You will certainly be the winner if you do. Much good luck to you.
korkev313
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Re: Is anyone else having a problem with there moms?
I never asked her for any money, it was offered and i accepted...as for my step-father, as soon as i got engaged he sat down with my mom and said, ok lets figure out how we are going to pay for this, and my mom told him he was nuts, they werent paying for it. My FMIL doenst even live here, and hasnt put her 2 cents in for anything. I dont even want to talk to her about the money... my feelings are hurt, i already have one parent that not in my life, i dont want two. Thank you for your opinions and advice!
