Is it bad that I REALLY

Shorty McBride Posted: Aug 29, 2005 11:55 AM

Is it bad that I REALLY

don't want a wedding?!!?

I've realized that I want a MARRIAGE, but not a wedding. I couldn't care less about a dress or the flowers or bridesmaids...

My parents are looking into buying a house/condo in Myrtle Beach, and FH has said that he will do whatever I want.

We've looked at halls, but there's something 'wrong' with every one of them. If I have a wedding here, I'm forced to invite and pay for more than 50 guests that I don't even know/like!

There's already been a blowout with FSIL about us not wanting FBIL (grossness incarnate) in the wedding party...isn't this supposed to be about us?!?!?

Suzannebride Posted: Aug 29, 2005 11:59 AM

Re: Is it bad that I REALLY

If the two of you really don't want a wedding, why go through all the time, expense and trouble? It is definitely supposed to be about what you and FH want. How nice to be able to use the money towards something else!

kissy27 Posted: Aug 29, 2005 12:01 PM

Re: Is it bad that I REALLY

i don't see anything wrong with it! Having a wedding does not constitute a wedding. The most important thing about a wedding is the ceremony where you are declaring your wish for a marriage. The wedding is only the celebration & there is no saying on how big or small it can be! Remember what is important to you & go with that!

glinda_goodwitch Posted: Aug 29, 2005 12:01 PM

Re: Is it bad that I REALLY

No, there is nothing wrong with that. A big wedding isn't for everyone. But, you will want to look back on the day that you got married, so I would suggest a small intimate reception at a restaurant or something like that.

leese Posted: Aug 29, 2005 12:02 PM

Re: Is it bad that I REALLY

why don't you do it low-scale... have your ceremony and a really chic and intimate dinner for close friends and family. you could spend less or more depending on what you want...

but i think you have a good attitude about the wedding. it's taken me a while, but i am no longer as crazed as i was in the beginning...other things come into focus that are more important than 'the day'

cindyandkevin Posted: Aug 29, 2005 12:02 PM

Re: Is it bad that I REALLY

Nic, if you really feel that way then I would just nix the whole wedding plans idea!! You should be happy and def do what you want. You can surely have a beautiful ceremony and an initmate gathering of immediate family for a reception. And use the bulk of your $$ towards what you really want!!! Good luck in your decision!!!

DUCKS2001 Posted: Aug 29, 2005 12:08 PM

Re: Is it bad that I REALLY

DO WHAT YOU FEEL IS RIGHT. THIS IS YOUR UPCOMMING MARRIAGE AND YOU NEED TO MAKE IT AS SPECIAL AS THE DAY YOU GOT ENGAGED.

EmberLynn Posted: Aug 29, 2005 12:09 PM

Re: Is it bad that I REALLY

Hey I support Eloping! go for it! If you want after you get married throw an after wedding party.

marymoon Posted: Aug 29, 2005 12:12 PM

Re: Is it bad that I REALLY

I am so with you, which is why I'm considering just going to Disney with only the closest peole, sort of half eloping. But I just feel like maybe I'll regret it later. You have to put some thought into what you really want to do. If you just want to ave a really intimate wedding, that opens up a lot of possibilities, like a rockin party on a boat, or your parents' backyard, etc. Your -eparty was so great, just a few more elegant touches to differentiate it and voila..wedding!

stephanief Posted: Aug 29, 2005 12:13 PM

Re: Is it bad that I REALLY

I word for you....ELOPE

Beth1210 Posted: Aug 29, 2005 12:29 PM

Re: Is it bad that I REALLY

I was offered a wedding or a sum of money equal to a wedding for a house

I chose the wedding- but I can see where you are coming from-

but I am so excited about the day and about our marriage- I feel like it's memories that I would never want to trade-

Hallowedding Posted: Aug 29, 2005 02:22 PM

Re: Is it bad that I REALLY

I went back and forth with having a destination wedding for just my fiance and myself, and having a small wedding up here on the island. Honestly, having nightmares about missing out on a wedding and getting to be a bride for a day (even though I never fantasized about this as a kid) helped me realize that deep down, I did want a wedding.

At first, I wasn't comfortable taking the money we have in the bank that was supposed to be for a down payment on our future home and using it to pay for a five hour party. I was the anti-bride at first, mostly because I tend to hoard money, and I don't want to part with it. After a while though, I came around. We're only having 80 people at our wedding - because I will not pay for people I don't know to celebrate my marriage with me.