FH's Sister just got engaged last new years, and I got engaged this September. I wanted a November 2011 wedding which she knew but 2 weeks before I got engaged she went and booked her wedding for July 2011. I was a little upset because I knew I wanted a 2011 wedding, but since I wasnt engaged yet, I brushed it off... Then 2 weeks later I was engaged and because FH comes from an old school Italian family and it would be disrespectful to have 2 weddings so close to each other I had to push back my wedding to 2012!!! So now because of his sister booking her wedding 2 years away, I have to wait 3!!!
So I sort of know how you are feeling and it *****!!! I hope everything works out for you!!
AngnShaun
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JMO but, i would never tell someone when they can or cant get married, just because i was engaged and planning my own wedding...
laurendaqt
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Obviously I am NOT telling them when they can or cant get married. They are booking the date. I am only asking for honest opinions, if I should be upset or not. I am going to take that as not to. Thanks
Mommy2BeBride
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Sure it's ok to be upset, but don't take it to heart, too much! You have your own wedding to worry about!!
Good luck with everything!
summerbride20
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I am with you. I am worried about something similar. I waited for my brother to finalize his wedding plans before FH and I decided to pick dates and start looking at venues for our wedding. But now, FH's brother is talking about proposing to his GF. We have waited over seven years for this and by the time we will get married it'll be 8 years. It seems my brother, his brother, and us will probably end up getting married all within the same timeframe. I guess that means it's normal but it annoys and upsets me.
Mommy2BeBride
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wow this happens often I guess if three of us are already in similar situations!
Future Mrs P
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I am not in this situation as all our siblings are younger thank god, but I think its pretty inconsiderate on their part. I know a family who had the wedding of their daughter the last weekend in July and August first her older brother mailed out his invitations, which I thought was pretty lousy. He couldn't wait even a few days just to give her time to be the bride.
AngnShaun
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Posted by laurendaqt
Obviously I am NOT telling them when they can or cant get married. They are booking the date. I am only asking for honest opinions, if I should be upset or not. I am going to take that as not to. Thanks
sorry, i didnt mean for it to sound like you were telling them when to get married.... i cant tell you if its ok to be upset or not... i personally wouldnt but that doesnt mean that you dont have the right to feel upset about it
pjankowski
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ohhhhh I understand!
Fh and I waited.. his sister got married.. then mine.... we waited... we finally realized that someone besides us is always also going to be planning their wedding. If we waited we would be waiting forever.. and the bottom line is..no one is holding off for us. It just shows that noone will ever be close to how excited you are about your own wedding.
Keep your chin up and TRY not to be too pissed!
CappyGirl
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There is nothing you can do about the way you feel, unfortunately. And I don't think you are wrong. My sister is getting married just 6 months after us and, I don't think she'd be upset for me to share that I went through a wide range of emotions. Happy, shocked, excited, sometimes enraged . . . but now we are totally ok. We will be each others MOHs and I truly am happy for her. The thing is, no matter how you feel at this moment, maybe a little bit like your thunder is being stolen, in the future, when none of this really matters anymore, you'll regret it if you weren't happy for her and there to support her. You may look back with regret, which I would never want to do. I want to look back at my sister's wedding with as many fond memories as I have (hopefully) of my own. FM if you need to vent.
Alyssa79
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at least it's not 4 days before yours even though you were engaged for months before. don't even get me started
Mommy2BeBride
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Posted by Alyssa79
at least it's not 4 days before yours even though you were engaged for months before. don't even get me started
4 days?!?!?
Bee12
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Posted by FallBride2012
Posted by Alyssa79
at least it's not 4 days before yours even though you were engaged for months before. don't even get me started
4 days?!?!?
thats crazy!!!
no you have a right to be upset but dont let this minimize your engagement joy... unfortunately,everyone is looking out for themselves - even our lovely families... it sux but its true!
CarolAnn721
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Posted by Alyssa79
at least it's not 4 days before yours even though you were engaged for months before. don't even get me started
I am goign through something similar right now. I just try to smile and wish the best. What can I do?
Alyssa79
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Posted by FallBride2012
Posted by Alyssa79
at least it's not 4 days before yours even though you were engaged for months before. don't even get me started
4 days?!?!?
yup. and they are family AND they are in the bridal party and the family that is coming are all OOT so they're either taking 2 trips up in 1 week or making a really long NY vacation.
EVERYONE has a right to be mad at this or upset i believe. No you cannot ask someone to get married at a certain time or not at a certain time, but you can never say you can't be mad or upset at a person for doing this. i think it's a respect issue
Mommy2BeBride
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Posted by Alyssa79
Posted by FallBride2012
Posted by Alyssa79
at least it's not 4 days before yours even though you were engaged for months before. don't even get me started
4 days?!?!?
yup. and they are family AND they are in the bridal party and the family that is coming are all OOT so they're either taking 2 trips up in 1 week or making a really long NY vacation.
EVERYONE has a right to be mad at this or upset i believe. No you cannot ask someone to get married at a certain time or not at a certain time, but you can never say you can't be mad or upset at a person for doing this. i think it's a respect issue
WOW! I'm sorry you are going through this!! But it most definetly is a respect issue and it just shows how disrespectful people can be!
Im getting Married
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Look on the bright side at least it after and not before..a few girls on here were heated b/c people booked before them.
Unfortunately, others usually look at what they want.
Me personally, I could care less when someone else is getting married..except maybe if it was the same day as me
MikesBride2B
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Honestly...I think you are overreacting. 4 months after yours is a pretty long time, it gives people time to chill after your wedding before getting hyped up for hers. I think its unreasonable to be upset over the date that they chose, I'm sure they had a lot of reasons for choosing that particular one. You are entitled to your feelings, but at the same time I would just let it go. When you get married it is your DAY and your MONTH, sure...but not your YEAR.
Sorry if this comes off as harsh, but for very legit reasons FH and I planned our wedding 2 months after FSIL's and she has been giving us hell and really making our lives miserable over it...I guess I just don't want to see that happen to someone else. (Not saying you would do that...but just as an example).
JAAMS
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I don't think that I can tell you whether or not to be upset, but I really don't think that 4 months is a big deal. That's plenty of time for everyone to rest up for your big day!
